tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-57913157935745540032024-03-13T14:02:41.915-07:00The Sports Blog of Comissioner SliceThe Sports Blog for the rest of us.Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.comBlogger27125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-13528375773417812672012-02-05T18:55:00.000-08:002012-02-05T19:17:19.103-08:00The Super-Diary6:30 And the Super Bowl has begun!!! By the way, I promise to get back to regular columns soon, just been Super-busy lately.<br />
6:33 Just a sign of how extensive the pre-game coverage has been; my mom knows who Vince Wilfork is. My dad still does not know what color uniforms the Giants wear.<br />
6:35 Giants have 1st and 10 around the 35. This is the kind of start that you need to have against the Pats, otherwise you're going to get in the hole momentum-wise. By the way, these are my two least favorite teams.<br />
6:37 The drive stalls after two sacks of Manning. Pats start the next drive at their own 5.<br />
6:39 Audi went with a vampire theme for their Super Bowl Commercial. I blame Twilight. Then again, I blame Twilight for a lot of things.<br />
6:41 Safety! 2-0 Giants on intentional grounding in own end zone by Brady. Does not look like any kind of intentional grounding I've ever seen, but then again screw Brady<br />
6:44 You know how Super Bowl crowds are usually neutral? That's out the window in this one, they might as well be playing in the Meadowlands with how few Pats fans there are.<br />
6:46 Giants are already driving on to the Pats side of the field. Seeing as how the Giants shocked them in the 07 Super Bowl and they beat them earlier this year, the Pats don't look nearly as pissed as they should be. One of my sacred rules of predicting games is "pick the team that looks way more excited". Let's just say the Giants qualify.<br />
6:49 Potentially huge turnover gets nullified by 12 Men On the Field for the Pats. Giants now have Second and Goal at the two.<br />
6:51 Touchdown Giants! Eli Manning threw a two yard touchdown to Victor Cruz. Al Michaels described New England's performance as "un-Patriotlike". I would make a "that means they forgot to plant the cameras" joke before I remembered that I'm a Jets fan and can't make jokes like that until the season's over.<br />
6:54 We have our first Celebrity Apprentice commercial featuring Jon Gaudi's daughter and Adam Carolla. To say that Trump is scraping the bottom of the barrel is an understatement.<br />
6:56 Another great Super Bowl prop bet, is Smash or The Voice going to have more commercials? The line is Smash by 2.5.<br />
6:59 First down New England at the 32 after a 19 yard completion to Welker. The Pats are starting to get in to the Hurry-Up offense as Al Michaels reminds us how well they ran the hurry-up against the Jets. Lets just say that I didn't need the reminder. End of the first quarter Giants 9 Pats 0<br />
7:01 And we have a GoDaddy commercial with Danica Patrick! Remember back in 2003 when those commercials were considered inappropriate? Then Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction happened and those commercials didn't seem so bad by comparison.<br />
7:05 Pats convert a field goal to make it 9-3 Giants.<br />
7:07 Great Doritos commercial. If only life's problems could be solved by bribing people with Doritos.<br />
7:09 This year's Super Bowl commercials was everybody's worst kept secret, you could almost view the whole lineup online. In a semi-related story, it's one to one in the Smash vs Voice bowl.<br />
7:11 Someday, I would really like to pretend this Super Bowl never happened. Just putting that out there.<br />
7:13 Commercial for the new Disney movie the Lorax features this Lorax responding to the question of whether he would hit a woman with "That's a woman?". That's what I found myself saying so often at Cotillion last weekend.<br />
7:15 Howard Stern is joining America's Got Talent. The over/under on accidentally inappropriate jokes is at 9 in three episodes.<br />
7:17 After a 12 Men in the Huddle penalty, Tom Coughlin's face has a reddish hue. That's another interesting prop bet, what color will Tom Coughlin's face be for the majority of the night? I'm going to lay fifteen dollars on light violet.<br />
7:22 Brady's had two passes batted down so far. That's another thing that the Giants do really well, taking away some short routes by batting passes down.<br />
7:24 Travis Beckum is out of the game with an ACL tear, which is a much bigger deal than you'd think. Also, injury reports are really the only situation where sideline reporters are needed.<br />
7:25 As the Giants start their next drive, I really have to wonder where Rob Gronkowski has been. If the Pats lose this game, then Bernard Karmell Pollard will have murdered the 08,09,and 11 Patriots seasons. Unbelievable.<br />
7:27 NBC Broadcast team shows an offensive line graphic where all of the Giant O-Line has their hands out and looks like they're trying to catch and eat a mouse or something. Comedy galore. <br />
7:30 Steve Weatherford pins the Pats inside their own five yet again. Yet another punter that the Jets cut that turned out to be great. Hey, who needs that guy when you've got T.J. Conley and his 35 yard net punting average?<br />
7:33 The Giants are absolutely slaughtering the Pats in time of possession and total plays run. The Pats should really count themselves as lucky to only be down 9-3.<br />
7:34 Gronkowski finally shows up and catches a 20 yard completion for a first down. He's the X Factor in this game, if he can get rolling the Pats are unstoppable. If he's average, then the Pats are beatable. If he disappears, then the Giants have a huge advantage.<br />
7:35 We're hopelessly outgunned. Mankind is on the brink of extermination. The man we need..... is Robert Downey Jr.<br />
7:37 I'm all for battling childhood obesity, but I'm not sure I'd qualify my Kinect as exercise.<br />
7:38 This is really a no-win situation for Peton Manning, he's 37 and coming off neck surgery and now has to watch either his biggest rival or his much less cool brother win a Super Bowl on his home field. Meanwhile, if he even decides to play next year, he'll be banished to football hell in Jacksonville or Buffalo. I almost feel sorry for the guy. You know, as much as you can feel sorry for a guy who has made hundreds of millions of dollars over fifteen years.<br />
7:41 Brady is doing a fantastic job running the two-minute offense. When he's on, he's the most terrifying QB in the league. As a Jet fan, I will never be happier to see a player retire.<br />
7:45 Pats are just outside the Giants 10 and I think I'm in hell right now.<br />
7:47 Touchdown Patriots. Pats 10 Giants 9. I would be depressed before I realized that I'm ending up depressed no matter who wins this.<br />
7:50 And the half is over. I am going to go eat dinner and skip the soul-sucking Madonna performance. Be back in a few.<br />
8:22 And we're back as the Pats have the ball at the 20 to start the half.<br />
8:23 First play is a 20 yard completion to Ocho. That's another thing that I hate about the Pats, the fact that they can practically start the stadium janitor at wide receiver and he'd get six catches for seventy yards and a touchdown.<br />
8:25 Even though we just came from halftime, you can see the Giant defense tiring. The most sickening part about this offense is that you can see everything that's about to happen before it happens. You can see the defense tiring, you can see the offensive line generating more and more push at the line of scrimmage, you can predict everything before it happens. I've mentioned the fact that I hate these guys, right?<br />
8:28 Touchdown Pats. Brady to Hernandez 12 yards. This is truly the Super Bowl From Hell<br />
8:29 We're up to three Smash commercials and one The Voice commercial. The Voice might be able to pull off a backdoor cover.<br />
8:33 Big third down conversion from Manning to Nicks. That's the great part about having two elite receivers, you'll usually have one of them open because the defense rolls all their coverage to the other one.<br />
8:35 Giants just outside the Pats red zone. I never realized how tiny the Patriots corners are, I feel like I'm almost taller than them. Then again, you could put in corners that aren't taller than Earl Boykins when you have Tom Brady on offense.<br />
8:37 Lawrence Tynes kicks a field goal to make the score Pats 17 Giants 12. Whatever happens, the Giants can't afford to let the Pats go up by more than ten points.<br />
8:39 To be honest, I never really think about hot women when I see a Fiat. But if Fiat says that's what I should be thinking about.....<br />
8:42 Coca-Cola's really going all-in with those old school polar bear commercials. It's getting to the point where I would like to have the polar bear in my living room just so I could tell him to shut up. If you couldn't tell, the Super Bowl from Hell is making me bitter and sarcastic about everything.<br />
8:46 Pierre-Paul looks shaken up, uh-oh.<br />
8:47 The Giant pass rush so far has been underwhelming to say the least. You always get trouble when you give Brady more than about two and a half seconds to throw. Of course, Brady got sacked to end a Pats drive as soon as I finished typing that.<br />
8:50 Yep, The Voice just logged its second commercial of the Night. Vegas just begged you to lay money on Smash. Also, the announcers are now talking about how great of a job Shaun Ellis is doing. I was wondering if this night could get more depressing.<br />
8:51 Lucky break for the Giants as Hynoski reocvers a Nicks fumble. I'm not saying that this is a sure sign that the Giants are going to win, but this stuff always happens to teams that are about to win the Super Bowl. Don't take that comment at face value because I'm trying to convince myself of every reason why the Pats can't win. I've mentioned that I hate them, right?<br />
8:55 Tynes drills a field goal to make it Pats 17 Giants 15. Even that makes me uncomfortable because all the Pats need is one touchdown plus extra point to make it a two score game again. At least the momentum is no longer solidly on the Pats side, no team in the league takes advantage of momentum quite like New England.<br />
8:59 In to the fourth we go with the Pats up by two.<br />
9:02 If Manning wins this game, he surpasses Roethlisberger and takes the number four spot behind Rodgers, Brees, and Brady. If Brady wins, that puts him past Brees as the best QB in the league in my mind.<br />
9:03 Brady is picked down the field by Chase Blackburn. That was a very smart throw by Brady, it worked out like a punt. <br />
9:05 Yet another lucky break as a Bradshaw fumble is recovered by the Giants, after which Manning calls timeout. Tom Coughlin's face is now a strong shade of violet.<br />
9:07 Loved the Ferris Beuhler style commercial for the CRV. Might be my favorite one of the night.<br />
9:08 And another one for Smash! It's got The Voice on the ropes, it just needs to run out the clock.<br />
9:09 Big third down conversion from Manning to Nicks. It's unbelievable how lucky the Giants have gotten. Two fumble recoveries, five Pats penalties, and a couple bad Brady passes despite a complete lack of pass rush. Wait, why am I complaining about this?<br />
9:14 Giants are across midfield on a Manning to Manningham connection. This is pretty much the only time in life where I'll ever root for the Giants.<br />
9:16 Al Michaels has done a fantastic job so far. He's pointed out that Maninngham has a tendency to fade his deep routes, which leads to incompletions. Those are the pieces of info that I'm looking for from announcers.<br />
9:18 Eli burns another time out to avoid a five yard penalty, and then the Giants get a false start on the next play anyways. Jake Ballard ends up falling as he tries to tell Tom Coughlin that the clock is running out. Only twenty to thirty minutes before the Super Bowl from Hell is over.<br />
9:21 New England starts this drive from the eight. The Giants have been fantastic on special teams today, it feels like the Pats haven't been starting drives on their own 35 and 40 like they usually do. <br />
9:23 Huge conversion to Danny Woodhead for a first down at the 34. Hey, it's not like the Jets could have used him. Who needs that guy when you can have Joe McKnight?<br />
9:26 Uh-oh, The Voice is staging a comeback, it's within one with half of the fourth quarter over.<br />
9:28 Third and three at midfield with five and a half minutes left to go, this is a big one.<br />
9:29 And they got it. It's not that big of a deal, the Giants still have three timeouts left. Hey wait a second, why is there only one dash under the Giants logo? Oh crap....<br />
9:30 The Giants catch another huge break as Welker drops a deep ball from Brady. I would be shocked if the Pats win at this point. I've watched the last seven or eight Super Bowls, and it always comes down to missed opportunities and lucky breaks. I can't remember a team that won the Super Bowl that has been as unlucky as the Pats have tonight.<br />
9:32 Manning completes a huge pass to Manningham that is currently under review. I almost feel sorry for the Pats, this will have been two Stomach Punch Super Bowls against the Giants in a row. For any Pats fans who are depressed about this (assuming that they lose), remember that you aren't the Jets.<br />
9:36 Play stands as called. Unbelievable.<br />
9:37 Manning to Manningham puts the Giants inside the 40 yard line. I suddenly have heartburn.<br />
9:38 We are at the two minute warning as the Giants are inside the Patriot red zone. This has been such a good game that I'm almost forgetting how much I hate the Giants. I'll promptly remember after seeing the Lombardi Trophy being presented to somebody.<br />
9:39 I can't tell you how much of a buzzkill it is to see a commercial for Swamp People during the Super Bowl.<br />
9:40 Our second Danica/Go Daddy commercial made up for the previous Buzzkill Swamp People commercial.<br />
9:41 Nicks gets the first down inside the Pats 10 and goes out of bounds. Not a smart move. By the way, I know Markau is having a coronary right now. I still can't decide whether this is fantastic or terrible.<br />
9:44 Touchdown New York Giants. Bradshaw was about to take a knee at the one, yet his momentum carried him in to the end zone. The two point conversion is no good. Giants 21 Pats 17.<br />
9:45 I can't imagine what was going through Ahmad Bradshaw's mind there. If I were him, I would absolutely fake trying to take a knee and go in to the end zone so I could tell people I scored in the Super Bowl. That's reason number 3,657 I couldn't be a football player. You know, other than a lack of talent and endurance. That too.<br />
9:47 The Pats have to drive the length of the field in under a minute, and yet I don't think it's impossible. That's how terrifying Tom Brady is.<br />
9:48 Two straight drops by Pats receivers brings up third and ten. Wow.<br />
9:49 Fourth and forever with 39 seconds to go. I'm not so sure I like Brady's chances here.<br />
9:50 He converts it! Pats are on their own 42 with seventeen seconds left. <br />
9:52 Brady and the Pats are just short of midfield with five seconds left. I can't even come up with interesting things to say anymore. I've almost whited out.<br />
9:53 Game over. Giants 21 Patriots 17.<br />
And thus the 2011 NFL Season comes to an end. Congratulations to the New York Giants. We'll revisit my preseason predictions to wrap up my NFL columns until the Draft. Hasta la Vista.Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-12905099625468417712012-01-15T16:53:00.000-08:002012-01-15T16:53:50.219-08:00The Divisional Diaries: Giants-Packers4:32 It's the Giants and Packers with everybody's favorite monotone announcer, Joe Buck!!<br />
4:34 Again, I really don't get why everybody is saying that the Giants are playing better than the first meeting. The first victory against Dallas was the only win post Week 13 where the opposing team showed up, and they should have lost that game too. They got embarassed by Washington and beat three "records are better than they actually are" teams in a row to get here. They played well in the Packers game, but don't tell me that the Giants are coming in to this game on fire.<br />
4:40 This game continues my streak of 350 football games where I don't care what the sideline reporter is saying.<br />
4:42 A one yard gain by Bradshaw on the first play leads to another thing that I really hate to see, defensive linemen avidly celebrating after tackling the running back for a short gain. It's almost as bad as the "I'm on TV!!!!!" idiots from the Niners-Saints diary.<br />
4:44 Manning completes to Manningham for a 19 yard gain after avoiding the rush. That's another thing that nobody ever talks about with Manning and Rodgers, they can move around in the pocket and make blitzers miss.<br />
4:47 Giants are on the Packers 32 with an eleven yard catch by Victor Cruz. Of course, Joe Buck just said "Manning has been so good on third down these past three games" without mentioning that the Jets, Cowboys, and Falcons have all been found to be frauds. That said, Manning has been great so far, they're inside the Packer red zone. Also, Tom Coughlin's face is bright red. I want to see what it would take to turn Coughlin's face purple, although any chance of that probably died when Burress was traded.<br />
4:51 3-0 Giants after a Lawrence Tynes field goal. I also just saw that annoying Southwest Airlines commercial again. Not only am I weeping, I think Deion Sanders might have just killed his vocal chords yelling at the TV.<br />
4:53 Another beauty of a commercial with the snowboarding Ford. Or Nissan. Or whatever. I want to see somebody try crossing car commercials. For instance, start playing the classy luxury car music over a Ford commercial or have the Ford announcer with the really deep voice do a Toyota Camry commercial. These are the things that you start thinking about after dissecting playoff games for two days and writing mega diaries about them.<br />
4:59 Rodgers moving his offense down the field just as quickly as Manning did. Rodgers might be a superhuman, the location of every single one of his passes is absolutely perfect. You don't get any free incompletions with Rodgers, either his receivers have to make a bad play or the defense has to force it. Tom Brady is pretty much the only other QB in the league that I can say that about. Mark Sanchez would rank last in this category for the season and Jake Delhomme would rank last in this category for a career.<br />
5:02 3-3 tie after Mason Crosby hits a 47 yard field goal. Of course, after I finished typing that last post, Rodgers missed a wide open Greg Jennings for a touchdown. <br />
5:08 Manning drops back to pass.<br />
5:09 He's still back there...<br />
5:10 11 yard completion for a first down!<br />
5:10 Touchdown New York Giants!!! Manning to Nicks 66 yard touchdown. That was helped by a failed shoulder tackle by Charlie Pepprah. That's the one thing I hate most about the crazy quarterback/flag football era, very few defenders really execute the proper way to tackle anymore.<br />
5:13 Kickoff goes out of bounds to set the Pack up at the 40. Of course, Joe Buck commented on Tom Coughlin's face, which is currently turning various shades of maroon. I was about to make a "leave it to the Giants to shoot themselves in the leg" joke before I remembered that Plaxico plays for the Jets now.<br />
5:27 Kuhn?<br />
5:27 KUUUUUUHHHHHHNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!! 10-10 Tie, although the Giants absolutely got hosed by the refs on that no fumble call. <br />
5:28 The Packers try an onside kick that doesn't work, giving Eli a short field. Every single sports talk radio person is going to be talking about that one tomorrow if the Giants win. Also, since most of them say the same thing, I'm just going to refer to every sports talk radio host as Boomer and Coach, since Boomer is the most common sports talk nickname and it seems that it's illegal to have a sports talk radio station without someone having the nickname Coach.<br />
5:32 The Packers block a Lawrence Tynes field goal to keep the score at 10-10. I can't wait for Boomer and Coach to break that one down on 95.6 Superfan tomorrow morning.<br />
5:35 Is it just me, or is the referee even more monotone than Joe Buck?<br />
5:37 Rodgers evades a Giant blitz and rushes for a first down to the Giants 40 with 11 minutes left in the second. Nobody ever talks about Rodgers' scrambling ability and you never notice it until he makes 12 yards out of nothing for a first down.<br />
5:43 Joe Buck just had to advertise the new Napoleon Dynamite cartoon and his voice was a mix of horrified and disgusted. That was fantastic.<br />
5:45 Now that I think about it, the whole "Wierd things always happen on the Sunday Night Game of Round Two" is definitely working in the Giants favor.<br />
5:48 Interception! Morgan Burnett picks off Manning with 5 and a half minutes left in the second quarter. That was the first time that the Packers got any kind of pressure on Manning and it made him overthrow that pass in to double coverage. Great defensive play by Green Bay. Also, after three quarters of the diary done, I'm running on fumes. I have to go eat dinner right now, so I'll be back after halftime.<br />
6:13 Of course, I come back downstairs just in time to see a replay of the Hail Mary touchdown. I think Joe Buck might have even raised his voice a little. It's 20-10 Giants at halftime and that Hail Mary switched the whole game in the Giants favor. The Hail Mary combined with all of the drops from Green Bay has just sucked all the momentum from the Packers. <br />
6:18 For such an improbable moment in a game that at least 40 people on my friends list are watching, I'm disappointed by the facebook reaction, only one post. If I could give my friends a "Come on, Man", I absolutely would. The Hail Mary is going to overshadow all of the reasons why the Packers are down right now, drops, no pressure on Manning, and sloppy route execution. These are not the Packers that showed up in Week 13, that's for sure.<br />
6:23 Arsenal! Manchester United! It's the English Premier League next Sunday on FOX!!!<br />
6:27 Is Chris Myers our first male sideline reporter since the 70s? Did they even have sideline reporters in the 70s? Were they as bad as they were today?<br />
6:28 Speaking of bad sideline reporters, Pam Oliver's talking.<br />
6:30 Something's off with Rodgers' coordination with his receivers today, it seems like they're three or four yards out of sync.<br />
6:33 Just as Rodgers is threatening to take it in, the Giants recover a Rodgers fumble. It's almost scripted at this point, every time the Packers look like they might have something going, the Giants kill it.<br />
6:37 I'm running out of witty and insightful things to say. My sugar rush is collapsing and I've seen the same set of about 25 commercials to comment on all weekend. I need something along the lines of the Teleflora commercial from last year's super bowl to turn this entry around.<br />
7:00 Sorry about the 23 minute hiatus, just finishing up putting away the Christmas stuff. The score is 20-13 Giants. I just sat down in time to see Rodgers scramble for a first down at the end of the thid quarter. The Giants defense has been doing an amazing job on the Packers offense so far, I haven't seen Rodgers this flustered since his last press conference.<br />
7:04 Mark Sanchez and Eli Manning used to do those Toyota commercials. Now it's been reduced to just Manning. If that's not a sign to at least think about a quarterback change soon, I really don't know what it will take short of running on to the field in a tuxedo or becoming a Ben Roethlisberger style seedy bar regular.<br />
7:06 Pam Oliver's talking again.<br />
7:07 The Giants stop the Packers on fourth down from their own 40. This game is following the trend of Sunday Night home teams laying an egg (2011 Packers, 2010 Pats, 2009 Chargers, 2007 Cowboys, etc)<br />
7:11 If somebody would have told me before this that the Giants would be beating the Packers despite having exactly one first down by 11 minutes in the fourth quarter, I would never have talked to them about football again.This is unbelievable.<br />
7:17 I think that any and all advertisements for Glee or other dramas of sort should be illegal during football games. Of course, I think that Glee and all other dramas should be illegal.<br />
7:18 Quote from broadcasting buddy Gavin Schall "If David Tyree and Superman had a baby, he would look like Hakeem Nicks" Uh, thanks Gavin.<br />
7:19 Tynes nails a field goal to put the Giants ahead 23-13. You know the Packers are in trouble when Tom Coughlin's face is only a light shade of red.<br />
7:23 What an enlightening report from Chris Myers! So Rodgers said to somebody "We've gotta score"? We're sure about this? Riveting stuff.<br />
7:24 That's a fumble recovery by the Giants returned to the Packers four yard line. The Pack are on the ropes.<br />
7:25 And that's the Knockout Punch! Giants are up 30-13 with a 4 yard pass to Mario Manningham. Stick a fork in the Packers, they're done.<br />
7:26 I realize that this is a depressing day for Packers fans, but at least the State Farm commercial starring Rodgers and Matthews was likeable. Sadly, I think every State Farm commercial has been the highlight of the game for the Packers.<em>Hey Rodgers!! Rodgers!!! DISCOUNT DOUBLE CHECK!!!!</em><br />
7:28 My prediction that the Pack would destroy the Giants was not one of my better ones to say the least. I'm just going to pretend that prediction never happened. I would like to point out that I'm doing OK these playoffs, this is my only loss against the spread so far (I picked the Steelers to beat the Broncos, but not by double digits, and I picked the Ravens to beat the Texans, but not by the spread).<br />
7:33 The Packers are driving inside the Giant red zone while Joe Buck pretends that he's still really interested in the last five minutes of this game.<br />
7:36 Joe Buck raised his voice! That means the Packers scored!!! 30-20 New York as Rodgers fires a bullet to Donald Driver for the touchdown.<br />
7:39 The Giants recover the onside kick. Of course, this is the Giants so anything can happen.<br />
7:42 After the Packers force a third and eleven, they generate no pass rush on Eli, who zips it over the middle to a wide open Victor Cruz for 17 yards. That's really the game in a nutshell for the Packers.<br />
7:43 Bradshaw runs for 24 yards, that just about wraps things up.<br />
7:45 Touchdown Brandon Jacobs! That should pretty much wrap the game up. Not only is the fat lady singing, but Tom Coughlin's face has turned completely normal.<br />
Now that this game is basically over, so is the mega-diary. We end the divisional diaries with a huge upset, the Giants beating the Packers. I guess that at the end of the day, the best teams won and we can look forward to a great conference championship weekend. I guess this diary is over because there is nothing more that anyone can say about the divisional weekend. Not me, not Ricky Gervais later tonight, and not Boomer and Coach on 95.7 Superfan.<br />
Score: Giants 37 Packers 20 <br />
Parts of the Mega-Diary done: 4 out of 4<br />
Hours spent on the Mega-Diary: 15 give or take a few.<br />
AFC Conference Championship: Patriots vs Ravens<br />
NFC Conference Championship Giants vs Packers<br />
Teams with Super Bowl Hopes Still Alive: FourCommish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-9502682666364751472012-01-15T12:50:00.000-08:002012-01-15T13:02:38.969-08:00The Divisional Diaries: Texans-Ravens1:00 Yates! Flacco!! It's the AFC Divisional Playoffs on CBS!<br />
1:05 After a huge kickoff return by Danieal, Yates completes a 10 yard pass to Andre Johnson to set the Texans up at the 30. It's scary to think what the Texans could have done if Schaub, Foster, Johnson, and the entire defense were healthy for the whole season instead of a few games. 14-2 definitely would not have been out of the question. Instead, we have T.J. Yates starting in Baltimore. This is not ending well for Houston.<br />
1:09 3-0 Texans on a Rackers field goal. I also got to see the stupid touchdown celebration Southwest Airlines commercial again. I might cry if I see that commercial one more time.<br />
1:12 The Ravens just dodged a bullet on a special teams fumble recovery. Take it from a Jets fan, nothing kills a team faster than turnovers, specifically special teams turnovers. Also, this game is the odds on favorite for least interesting of the weekend. It would have been a great game if Schaub were starting instead of Yates, but Schaub injured his Lisfranc in Week 12. I don't know what a Lisfranc is.<br />
1:14 Speaking of special teams turnovers, the Ravens just got a huge one as the spirit of Antonio Cromartie invaded Jacoby Jones and forced him to try and field a bouncing punt with two guys on him. I've seen a lot of dumb special teams plays, but that was the dumbest bar none. <br />
1:16 Touchdown Baltimore! Flacco to Kris Wilson on a one yard touchdown!! Don't worry, it's much less interesting than the exclamation points would suggest. Also, no matter what happens in this game, Ravens management should really send Jacoby Jones a gift basket.<br />
1:22 It's impossible for Gary Kubiak to look more confused than he is now. Oh, wait, that's how he always looks.<br />
1:24 Every time I see the Galaxy Nexus "organize your social life in to circles" commercial, I keep thinking about what it would be like if you accidentally posted something meant for friends to your ex-girlfriend circle. In ten years, that's going to replace clicking "send all" on an insulting email as the number one social/computer related mistake. <br />
1:28 Baltimore drive stalls in Houston territory after a sack-fumble was recovered by Baltimore. Cundiff just hit a field goal from 48 yards out to make it 10-3.<br />
1:33 Just found out that T.J. Yates' full name is Taylor Jonathan Yates. I'm pretty sure that there has never been a whiter name in the history of mankind.<br />
1:38 Flacco complained to media this week that he does not get enough respect (which I think is true), so he grew an intimidating playoff fu manchu. I'm still asking the PHS swimming team to grow sectionals goatees.<br />
1:40 That's turnover number 2 on the day for Houston, Baltimore gets the ball on the Houston 40. Is anyone else super excited for a Ravens blowout? No?<br />
1:44 Touchdown Baltimore! A 27 yard pass from Flacco to Rice on a blitz and then a 12 yard touchdown to Boldin put the Ravens up 17-3. We're one Yates pick and Baltimore touchdown away from me playing Skyrim. Nah, I've got to keep up with this at least until halftime.<br />
1:49 Cool, now it looks like both Ed Reed and Arian Foster got injured. I was wondering if this game could be less interesting. Although maybe that is a point of interest, seeing how not interesting it could be. I suddenly have a headache.<br />
1:54 The Texans are gunning for the end zone from the Ravens 10. Of course, Yates overthrows Andre Johnson in the end zone by a good four feet. <br />
1:58 17-6 Ravens on another Rackers field goal. Judging from the way that the Ravens defense has cooked Taylor Jonathan Yates III, the Texans could not be more done.<br />
2:01 Two random fans in Baltimore are dressed up as first down markers. This is the most exciting thing that's happened all game.<br />
2:07 Jon Harbaugh challenged an Arian Foster 25 yard run on the basis that he stepped out of bounds. It's OK, Marvin Lewis. You can step out of that Jon Harbaugh costume now, we know you're here.<br />
2:13 The Texans are inside the Ravens 30 on another Foster run. It looks like the Texans are starting to make a game of it.<br />
2:16 Texans on the one yard line after a one handed catch by Arian Foster. It's amazing to watch Foster, every game he plays with the same intensity and never stops running like a freight train. He never takes the easy way out, he never runs like he does not want to be tackled , basically he's the running back version of Santonio Holmes, only the exact opposite if that makes any sense.<br />
2:20 Touchdown Houston! Arian Foster took it in on a one yard touchdown dive to make it 17-13 Ravens. Foster already has 15 carries, 95 yards, and a touchdown (not including receiving yards) I mentioned that we haven't hit halftime yet, right?<br />
2:26 Flacco just completed a long pass to Boldin that was so technically perfect that Dan Dierdorff woke up from his nap. Perfect location from Flacco and an amazing catch by Boldin put the Ravens inside Texan territory. Anquan Boldin looks like the favorite for MVP of this game so far, he's bailed Flacco out a couple times with some big catches.<br />
2:30 The Ravens drive stalls after J.J. Watt sacks Flacco. That should take us to halftime and me to the freezer for an ice cream sandwich.<br />
2:39 We go to the CBS halftime crew with special guest Ndamukong Suh! I've gotta say, Ndamukong has been pretty enlightening, I could absolutely see him as a broadcaster in ten or fifteen years. I thought he was going to suffer from a Strahan style lisp or something like that, but he's been great so far.<br />
2:48 The second half starts with a shout-out to the punt/pass/kick competition. I remember when I used to want to do that before I realized that I don't have the slighest bit of talent for it. I also wanted to be in the NFL when I was six but was stymied by the whole lack of talent/lack of any pain tolerance combination. Although I suppose I might get Carpal Tunnel by 2015 if I keep writing these diaries.<br />
2:58 ESPN reports that Jeff Fisher and Brian Schottenheimer are talking about Schotty going to the Rams. If you use Bill Simmons' coach hiring method (float their name out as a possibility and then check the previous teams message boards), this is about the most obvious no hire ever.<br />
3:00 The Texans defense is starting to come on, they're teeing off on Flacco right now. He looks more confused than Gary Kubiak trying to decide a fourth and two play.<br />
3:06 The Texans are at the Ravens 33 as Joe Flacco still looks like a Karate Kid villian in his awesome Fu Manchu.<br />
3:09 Rackers misses on a field goal to keep the score 17-13. Besides turnovers, nothing kills a team faster than missed field goals. Again, take it from a Jets fan.<br />
3:12 Flacco is inside the Houston red zone as Lee Evans makes a tremendous one handed back shoulder catch over Kareem Jackson. That's the third or fourth amazing catch over Kareem Jackson today. I almost feel bad for him because it's been great coverage every time, he's just been victimized by Anquan Boldin.<br />
3:15 It's fourth and goal on the one for Baltimore. I'd say go for it, you've gotta have faith in Ray Rice and your offfensive line. If you don't get it, you leave Yates throwing in to the wind on the one yard line.<br />
3:16 The Ravens went for it and didn't get it. Still, I like the decision by Harbaugh, there's really no downside to going for it at the one. Bill Belichick would smile approvingly at that past sentence. You know, if Bill Belichick weren't an emotionless robot.<br />
3:20 And the Texans can't get it back to the five yard line before they're forced to punt. The Ravens will get it at the 50 yard line. That's the best thing about going for it inside two yards, if you don't make it, you're guarunteed good field position on your next drive as long as you can hold them to under 15 or 20 yards.<br />
3:26 Couldn't help but notice that the punt/pass/kick championships in the 14-15 year old division was won by two Vikings fans. Besides nearly making the Super Bowl in 2009, this is the best thing that's happened for the Vikes in the last decade or so.<br />
3:32 At this point, the Texans are not even bothering trying to hide the fact that Arian Foster is their whole offense at this point. They're either riding Foster to a victory in the fourth quarter (with 11 minutes left) or going home. <br />
3:37 And Joe Flacco goes down again!! I've got to give credit to this Texans defense, they've completely disrupted Joe Flacco and Ray Rice all day, especially J.J. Watt. Watt is going to take Jared Allen's place as the best defensive end in football in four or five years. Just watch.<br />
3:42 After getting a lucky bounce on a Foster fumble, Yates throws another pick to Lardarius Webb. I have to give Yates credit, he's been pretty good considering the circumstances. However, considering it's an unproven rookie and he's on the road in Baltimore, you knew this had to happen at some point, right?<br />
3:45 The Ravens have the ball across midfield with 4 minutes left in the fourth. They just need two or three more first downs and this game is over.<br />
3:50 Two straight incomplete passes stop the clock at 2:50. Here comes Cundiff.<br />
3:52 And Cundiff nails it! 20-13 Baltimore with three minutes left in the game. This is pretty much the best situation that the Texans could have hoped for. I use the word "best" in perspective because there really is no best case scenario with T.J. Yates on the road in Baltimore for a playoff game.<br />
3:56 Uh-oh, I definitely spoke too soon on T.J. Yates. He just connected with Andre Johnson on two long passes to get inside the Ravens' 40. This game has come a long way from its not interesting beginnings.<br />
3:58 Yates just got picked by Ed Reed and it looks like this game is over.<br />
4:01 First down Baltimore. Ravens 20 Texans 13 Ravens Turnovers 0 Texans Turnovers 4. Parts of the Mega-Diary completed 3Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-90660252250230943182012-01-14T19:52:00.000-08:002012-01-14T19:57:27.539-08:00The Divisional Diaries: Patriots-Broncos8:30 Sadly, I thought that game time was at 8:30 instead of 8 so I missed the first thirty minutes of the game. Those thirty minutes will have to be lost to history. Pats are up 7-0 on the Broncos halfway through the first and are driving again. This does not look good.<br />
8:31 Pats are now in the red zone with a Brady to Gronkowski connection. The Hernandez-Gronkowski tandem are definitely on the cover of Guys That Murder You in the Playoffs. <br />
8:34 A seven yard run by Woodhead puts the Pats inside the ten. That's the annoying thing about the Patriots, each play goes for at least five yards when they're on.<br />
8:38 14-0 Pats on a Gronkowski touchdown. We're starting to move in to blowout range. This seems as good a time as any to mention that I hate the Patriots.<br />
8:42 It looks like Tebow time is just about up. Of course, never bet against God or puppies. Also, if the NFL were to ever fix a game for someone, wouldn't this game be it? <br />
8:45 Broncos pick up a first after a huge break on a near fumble that would hve put the game away for the Pats. I'm pretty sure that would have been called as a fumble if Kyle Orton were the quarterback.<br />
8:48 CBS just ran another ad for Person of Interest (two in the last few minutes). Person of Interest is going to take the place of Blue Bloods as the show that CBS will try to ram down your throat with advertising. Good times!<br />
8:50 Interception!!! The return puts the Broncos inside the Patriot 30 yard line. Perhaps Tebow time isn't quite through....<br />
8:55 Even though I usually don't watch David Letterman, that Ricky Gervais appearance looks pretty interesting...<br />
8:56 TOUCHDOWN DENVER BRONCOS!!! Afterwards, there's a fight and an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty on the Broncos' Zane Beadles. I think that he might end up being a tragic figure later in this game. If he is, I can't think of an actor that's ugly enough to play him in the movie. That brings up a good point, why doesn't Hollywood have actors on retainer to play homeless people, desert island survivors, and Zane Beadles? 14-7 Pats.<br />
9:00 Woodhead returns the kick to the 40 as Jim Nantz pronounces Hawaii as Huh-wah-ey. Glad he's here. Nantz, not Woodhead.<br />
9:05 Broncos get the ball at their own five yard line following the commercial break.<br />
9:07 Tebow is starting on his own 5, in single digit temperatures, with the wind going against them. Let's just say I don't like his chances.<br />
9:14 Uh-oh, the Pats are driving and in their unstoppale hurry-up offense. This is not ending well for Denver.<br />
9:16 Touchdown Patriots. Brady to Gronkowski yet again. 21-7 Patriots. If Tebow can actually lead the Broncos back, I'll vote for him when he runs for president in 2036. Of course, a commercial for a Christian organization airs right after that touchdown. That's just brilliant advertising.<br />
9:21 Pats get the ball back at about midfield. The Patriots are obliterating the Broncos in the field position battle. I want the Patriots to lose, but if they have to win, at least Bill Simmons will keep his 11-0 picking streak alive and I can look forward to Friday mailbags for the next decade or so.<br />
9:44 Couldn't update the log for a while, but I'm sitting down to type this right after Brady''s fifth TD. Again, I really hate the Patriots. <br />
9:51 Just looked at the Celtics record and Bill Simmons' running diary of the last game of the MLB season to confirm that, yes, bad things can still happen to teams from Boston.<br />
9:53 I can't even express how awkward/unintentionally funny it is to see Kris Jenkins talk on live TV. He sounds like my friend Ray on the morning bus when he's dead tired and incapable of communication above mumbling stuff.<br />
10:01 Really, it's only my self-commitment to doing a complete diary and loyalty to my five readers that keeps me from clicking off the game and playing Skyrim instead. Actually, that's probably what I'm going to end up doing anyways. <br />
10:04 Just got treated to the same terrible Southwest Airlines commercial with the guy doing touchdown celebrations for the fifth time. Sadly, this has been one of the brighter moments of the game.<br />
10:07 Edelman returns it past midfield to the Denver side of the field. I've been looking at who would be a worse matchup for the Pats in the AFC Champioship game ever since the 9:44 entry. This is disgusting.<br />
10:09 CBS just showed a trailer for Journey 2: Mysterious Island. I've never heard of Journey 1 and its odds for a solid opening weekend has got to be worse than the Broncos coming back. I've now been reduced to commenting on random commercials to try and make this interesting. I think I might have to resort to Skyrim soon.<br />
!0:13 That's touchdown number six for Brady. My finger is moving over the mode button on my controller and I'm getting up to turn on my XBOX...<br />
10:19 I just saw the mini-Herman Edwards beer commercial back to back with a Blue Bloods promo. Our currently most overplayed commercial back to back with our former CBS most overplayed promo champ. This is what I've been reduced to commenting on.<br />
10:24 And it looks like Tebow might be hurt. That's just injury to insult.<br />
10:26 They were just talking about the Patriots' playoff drought and how the Jets beat them in their own stadium last year. Those were the days when the Jets were good and Rex Ryan had the pulse of the team.<br />
10:31 The 32nd,31st,20th, and 29th ranked pass defenses all made it to the divisional round. I'm not going to make the "are we going to start playing flag football next?" joke, but that's just depressing.<br />
10:36 If I had to pick the most demoralizing thing about this game, it's seeing Shawn Ellis playing in a Pats uniform. He was the only player left from my first season as a Jets fan. Now, he's a Patriot. Like I said, it's pretty sad.<br />
10:49 Alright, I'm giving up on this diary before Brady potentially throws his seventh touchdown. I can't think of anything interesting to say about this game anymore and I would much rather go play Skyrim then watch my least favorite team advance to the AFC Conference Championship. I'll be back tomorrow with my running diaries of the two other divisional round games. Good night and good luck everybody (and may I never use Keith Olbermann's closing line again).Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-58787593690458179312012-01-14T17:29:00.000-08:002012-01-14T17:29:07.256-08:00The Divisional Diaries:Saints-NinersTebow-Brady,Best offense-Best defense, Everybody believes in us-Nobody believes in us, and wishing Gus Johnson could announce the Pats-Broncos game are all major storylines on Divisional weekend in the NFL. I'm helping out with taking down Christmas decorations, but that's not stopping me from watching all four games and shirking all homework/end of Christmas related responsibilities.Here is exactly what happened between the days of 1/14/11 and 1/15/11.<br />
SAINTS VS 49ERS<br />
3:56 I flip to the NFL Pregame show just in time to see Don Rickles insult the entire FOX staff. Typical dentist joke for Strahan, typical hair insult for Jimmie Johnson, and an "I never heard of you and furthermore, I don't care" insult for Kirk Menaphee. Or is it Kurt? I really don't care either.<br />
4:02 I really don't understand why Packers-Giants and Pats-Broncos were that much more interesting to the public than Saints-Niners. I kinda get why Pats-Broncos would be more interesting, but everybody's gonna regret jumping on the Giants bandwagon once the Packers beat them down. Nobody's been paying attention to the Pack all week, everybody's been jumping on the Giants without mentioning that their secondary is overdue for a terrible game. Niners-Saints looks way more interesting, a great defense facing off against a historic offense. I'm going with the Niners in this game for the same reason, everybody's piling on the Saints and their offense without mentioning the Niners' equally great defense. I've seen the Saints D give up some long drives this year, and the Niners do the "get three-four yards per carry, milk the time of possession, always remember the field position battle" routine better than anyone. I like this matchup for San Fran.<br />
4:10 Just watched the "Sounds of the game" FOX and the Niners look 10 times more pumped up about this game than the Saints. Also, the first "Why aren't you helping Dad with the Christmas stuff?" question from Mom happened a few minutes ago. I'm setting the over-under for these questions at 15 for the weekend.<br />
4:21 Just got treated to a segment where Donald Trump picks football games and says that he unofficially bought Tebow Time. Is it any surprise that he picked all the favorites? I think he just pulled up a computer with all the lines, picked the favorites, and mixed in some of his typical Trump superlatives like "luxurious" and "amazing". It's pretty much impossible to be a bigger blowhard than Trump at this point.<br />
4:34 Brees! Smith! It's the NFC Divisional Playoffs on FOX!!!!<br />
4:38 Saints already at midfield on a Darren Sproles 10 yard run. If there's one player that I could see killing the Niners in this game, it's Sproles. In the playoffs, it's very rarely the star that kills you, it's always the secretly terrifying guy that gets overlooked because of the star. Sproles has the stats, skills, and height for the role. As I write this, the Saints are now in the red zone on a pass interference call. Uh-oh.<br />
4:43 Carlos Rogers just dropped an interception that could have killed the Saints' momentum. Instead, the Saints have 1st and goal. It bears mentioning that Jimmy Graham isn't in there anymore, the Niners can be very successful making the Saints match field goals with them.<br />
4:46 Donte Whitner causes a HUGE fumble that the announcers could not rally the proper enthusiasm for. The Niners need a couple of these plays to win considering the fact that they practically send Akers out on first and goal from the 5. <br />
4:52 Niners at midfield as Alex Smith whips a ball five yards behind Ted Ginn. That's really the strongest case for the Saints in a nutshell, the fact that they're going against Alex Smith. A big fumble that happened just now definitely did not help matters.<br />
4:58 The announcers just mentioned a play action pass, prompting dad to ask "What's a play action?" for about the millionth time in ten years. It's almost turned in to a running joke over the years. The Saints just punted after Aldon Smith sacked Drew Brees. Nobody's heard of this guy, but he's had 14 sacks over the course of the season. These are precisely the type of guys who kill you in the playoffs.<br />
5:02 TOUCHDOWN 49ers!!!! Alex Smith threw a 49 yard touchdown pass to Vernon Davis. Davis had the Saints beat roughly one second after he got off the line and ran through Malcolm Jenkins' half-hearted attempt at tackling him. 7-0 Niners.<br />
5:04 I forget which soda is running those"It's not for women" ads, but they're definitely getting sued over it. Martha Burke might be picketing their headquarters right now.<br />
5:09 Brees just threw a pick that the Niners returned to the 5. I've gotta say, the Niners defense has been fantastic at taking away the deep ball. It's first and goal at the four, is David Akers coming out yet?<br />
5:10 Second and goal, are we there yet?<br />
5:11 Third and goal, we just got a camera shot of Alex Smith making the Alex Smith face, Akers might as well start trotting out.<br />
5:12 OK never mind, the Niners just scored. 14-0 San Fran. The Saints have not shown up so far, they haven't looked remotely inspired since the goal line fumble. The Niners are playing like this game is roughly a million times more important to them. It's like Santonio Holmes has invaded the Saints.<br />
5:14 Niners just got the ball on a botched kickoff and several Niners and Saints get in to a scuffle at the end of the play. You might see someone on the Saints pull an Andrew Bynum style body slam on one of the Niners.<br />
5:19 FOX just showed a graphic that stated the Niners' average starting field position is at the Saints' 43. Also, here comes David Akers. Whew. Having Alex Smith throw three touchdowns before halftime in a playoff game would bring about the apocalypse. 17-0 Niners.<br />
5:27 Saints are currently challenging the ruling on the field of a fumble. They'd better, that would make four turnovers before the second quarter is half over. This is just a dominating performance by the Niners' defense, they're refusing to let Colston breathe and Brees has been forced to check it down more times than he had in the whole Detroit game. Also, I'm amazed that I've gone back and forth between the disassembled Christmas tree and the laptop a dozen times and only partially broke one ornament.<br />
5:31 Saints win the challenge. That could build a little momentum for a team that has less than none of it.<br />
5:33 Jimmy Graham is back and just made a catch that put the Saints inside the Niners 15 yard line.<br />
5:34 And the Saints finally get on the board with the Red Zone Target Jimmy Graham, although they were saved by a no challenge on a Chris Ivory fumble. If the Niners blow this game, that one's getting replayed on every postgame special for two days afterwards. 17-7 Saints.<br />
5:37 You know how when cutting away or to a game, the production crew always shows those view of random people and sights in whatever city they're in? Some idiot on a cable car was doing the whole "look at me, I'm on TV!!! No, seriously! I"M ON TV!!!!!" routine. I hate those people.<br />
5:40 Just checking facebook during a down moment during the game and I've already seen three "the Saints suck" style status updates. You know it's a big game when at least five non-avid football people comment on the game. The only thing that you need to know about the Tebow game is that over 25 people on my friends list commented immediately after Tebow's TD.<br />
5:51 Touchdown Saints! Brees just threw a 23 yard touchdown to Marques Colston. That was the first time we've seen the old Drew Brees, that was such perfect location that I think Kenny Albert might have cried. 17-14 Niners.<br />
6:03 Saints had the momentum until Brees threw his second pick of the day. As Rich Eisen would say, "Momentum just put on a gold dome". <br />
6:09 Niners have to punt it back to the Saints with a minute left. I like what the Niners did this half, they forced turnovers and took the Saints out of what they wanted to do. However, it's a little unsettling that the Candlestick Park JumboTron operator decided to play heavy rock music as Brees walked out on to the field; the "I'm going to kick everybody's butt" type of music that they play in action movies during the most awesome montage. <br />
6:12 Niners are about to get the ball back with thirty seconds left. I guess the montage music only works for Rambo, Chuck Norris, and Tim Tebow.<br />
6:15 IT"S A FUMBLE!!!! AND THE SAINTS HAVE IT!!!!<br />
6:20 17-14 Niners at the half.<br />
6:31 The second half comes back with FOX showing the obligatory highlight reel of the first half with Knigts of Cydonia blaring in the background. I'm pretty sure that there's a "you must play Knights of Cydonia at least once every two weeks" clause in FOX's contract with the NFL.<br />
6:34 Tony Siragusa took off an ugly pair of shades that he was wearing in the first half. Somehow, this made him look worse.<br />
6:38 After another turnover by the Saints (that makes 5), we have a bigger 30 second fight. It looks like some punches might have been thrown, but no unsportsmanlike conduct penalties were issued, although you could make the case that the entire Saints' special teams is unsportsmanlike.<br />
6:41 After Crabtree's third drop, here comes David Akers.<br />
6:42 Akers is good on the field goal, 20-14 Niners. I'm waiting for Brees to punish the Niners for all the wasted opportunities, but the Saints' offense has been largely unsportsmanlike today.<br />
6:47 Brees just connected with Colston for over thirty yards for his first long pass today. The Saints are now on the Niners' side of the field. Jim Harbaugh looks nervous.<br />
6:59 Just as I thought "I need something interesting to happen, nothing has happened in the last twelve minutes", Brees completes a 20 yard pass to kick off a Saints drive.<br />
7:05 It's been a defensive battle during the last eight minutes with nothing that interesting happening on either side. I'm hoping that this token "nothing is happening" comment does not have to persist the entire Ravens-Texans game.<br />
7:11 Ted Ginn is being helped off the field after being incidentally kicked in the behind by Jabari Greer; although when you consider the vicious pick that Ginn laid on him I'm not so sure it was "incidental".<br />
7:13 I've gotta hand it to the Niners, their coverage has been phenomenal. I've never seen so many checkdowns in any game, much less from Drew Brees. Unfortunately, the Niners' pass rush has apparently died since we last saw them in the third quarter. No, that's what happened! I saw them an hour ago and they were fine! We need to get them in the emergency room, quick!!!<br />
7:17 Cool, I was wondering when FOX was going to show the turnover margin graphic. Let me get this straight, teams with +4 turnover margins usually win? We're positive?<br />
7:20 The Saints tack on a Jon Kasay field goal after narrowly missing a big Colston touchdown. 20-17 Niners.<br />
7:25 Niners get a huge break after a dropped interception by the Saints. Each team is going to be kicking themselves after this game in some way or another.<br />
7:29 It's a miracle!! The Niners' pass rush, they're gonna make it!!! Vital signs looking good, they're in stable condition.<br />
7:33 Here comes Gore.... GET OFF ME!!! FRANK GORE! ONE OF THE HARDEST RUNNERS IN THE LEAGUE!!!!!! SHUT UP DREW BREES!!!!!!! Sorry, I was briefly possessed by the spirit of the Marshawn Lynch video guy.<br />
7:34 Third and six on the Saints' 18, is Akers coming out yet?<br />
7:35 And Akers knocks it through!! 23-17 Niners.<br />
7:38 The Niners' special teams has done a fantastic job, I'm pretty sure that the Saints have not started past the 20 yard line. Of course, just as I think that, Daryl Johnston chimes in "This coverage team has been fantastic today". Also, Tony Siragusa looks even worse than last time; he's got that "I wish this game would end, I'm late for dinner" look that Santonio Holmes had going all year.<br />
7:40 We're halfway through the fourth and the Saints are starting to drive down the field. There's nothing more agonizing than leading for the whole game only to lose it on a last minute drive. I think that's what we're heading towards.<br />
7:44 Not only is that what just happened, it was a Brees to Sproles 44 yard touchdown. If I call one more of these sneaky playoff killers, I'll be qualified to write a small book called "Guys who Murder You in the Playoffs". The unassuming co-star, the sneaky good/silently terrifying guy, the guy that's way better than everybody gives him credit for, the veteran that's overdue for a big game, and Tim Tebow are all subcategories.<br />
7:48 And then there's Alex Smith, who definitely falls in to the "none of the above" category, who is being called upon to save the Niners season.<br />
7:49 And Smith just completed a 37 yard perfectly thrown pass to Vernon Davis. Unbelievable. I think it's a given that, one way or another, this game is ending up in David Akers' hands.<br />
7:51 12 Men in the Huddle called on the Niners. Not only did things just become very difficult for the Niners, I think Jim Harbaugh just had a heart attack.<br />
7:53 Touchdown San Francisco!!! Alex Smith (no seriously, Alex Smith) just took it in on a QB rollout. If there is a playcall Hall of Fame, that QB rollout is right up there. The two point conversion is no good. 29-24 Niners.<br />
7:58 The Excellent Niners Coverage Team just stuck the Saints at the twelve yard line. Brees has just over two minutes left with one timeout. It's Here Goes Nothing time for the Saints. Also, it's probably going to be dinner time soon so I might have to start the Pats-Broncos diary a little bit late. Sorry about that. Also, Brees just attempted his 61st pass to get the Saints to their own 34 yard line.<br />
8:03 TOUCHDOWN SAINTS!! Brees threw a 66 yard touchdown pass to Jimmy Graham. Pending two point conversion. Now being asked to save the season yet again; Alex Smith.<br />
8:10 And Alex Smith just saved the season!!!!! Smith threw another huge long pass to Vernon Davis, and then yet another pass to Vernon Davis for the game-wining touchdown. I don't know if that's a sign of the apocalypse, but I'm moving down to the basement anyways for the next couple hours. Hey, you never know when Tebow's involved.<br />
Niners 36 Saints 32. Parts of the Mega-Diary completed: 1 out of 4. Number of times Mom told me to help with the Christmas stuff, 5.Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-44772733120735731172012-01-10T13:33:00.000-08:002012-01-10T13:33:12.467-08:00SorryHey guys! Sorry about not posting an update in awhile. I've had lots of homework and I've been writing for SIKIDS, so that has taken up a lot of time. I'll be coming out with a new post this weekend, I guarantee it (actual guarantee, not a Rex Ryan guarantee)Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-60938421865728443412011-12-16T08:56:00.000-08:002011-12-16T15:25:01.843-08:00Week 15 Picks<div style="text-align: center;">These are going to again be super quick picks because of the fact that I have both a mild cold and a severe case of writer's block. I wrote that past sentence on Wednesday and I'm writing this one Thursday Night. At the rate I was going, I wouldn't be finished with the column by the time Chris Paul decides to flee the Clippers next year. Anyways, here are the picks.</div><div style="text-align: center;">COWBOYS OVER BUCS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Despte my better judgement, I'm picking the Cowboys, even though this is usually the type of game that the Boys lose. I just don't see a way that the Bucs can win with all of the turnovers and poor defensive play we've seen lately. By the way, remember in my NFL Preview when I said that the Bucs might be ready to get in to the playoffs? Actually, no, you shouldn't remember that. Just forget that ever happened. Did I even write an NFL Preview this year? I don't remember anything like that ocurring.</div><div style="text-align: center;">DOLPHINS OVER BILLS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Over the last half of this season, the Dolphins have been the team that Vegas is just <em>begging </em>people to wager against. It's kinda funny that even though the Dolphins have easily covered against Buffalo, Oakland, and Dallas, over 60 percent of Pigskin Pick 'Em players still have Buffalo over Miami this week. Keep trying, Vegas oddsmakers, you're not getting me on this one. Dolphins 27 Bills 13.</div><div style="text-align: center;">SEAHAWKS OVER BEARS</div><div style="text-align: center;">I can't decide which is more depressing, the Bears' offense without Cutler and Forte or the Chiefs' offense without Cassel and Charles. I did point out that the Bears' good luck with injuries last year was bound to swing the other way sometime in my NFL Preview Column (Ohhhh, now I remember writing one! Don't worry, we're going over every major prediction in my NFL Postmortem Column. I feel obligated to defend these predictions to my 40 to 50 readers). Also, I'm still rooting for that far-fetched "Every wild card contender in the NFC is at 9-7" scenario, although the Falcons mauling the Jaguars as I write this isn't helping matters at all. Seahawks win big as Marshawn Lynch (really overused joke coming. wait for it...... wait for it..... just a little longer.......) PUTS THE TEAM ON HIS BACK!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry, I couldn't resist.</div><div style="text-align: center;">BENGALS OVER RAMS</div><div style="text-align: center;">How depressing does it have to be for Rams fans that just a few months ago, everybody was saying that there was no doubt that Bradford was going to be an elite QB, and now those chances have dropped from 95% to pretty close to 0%? The Sam Bradford era so far has pretty nicely summed up what it was probably like to be a Rams fan these past few years. Dalton connects with Green on three long touchdowns as the Bengals keep their playoff hopes alive for one more week before seeing them crushed in Baltimore.</div><div style="text-align: center;">PACKERS OVER CHIEFS</div><div style="text-align: center;"><em>Hi, Aaron! Can I have your autograph? Oh thanks, you're the greatest! Yeah, make that out to Tyler Palko. No, Palko P-A-L-K-O. Yeah, I was out there today. You didn't see me? (awkward pause) Okay bye Aaron.</em></div><div style="text-align: center;">TITANS OVER COLTS<br />
After the Colts inevitably lose this game, I'm pretty sure that the making of Anrew Luck Colts jerseys can begin. The Colts have neither the talent nor incentives to win this game, and I wouldn't be surprised if they started benching key players. I love it how all the Colts fans were in an uproar when Caldwell benched the starters in 09, but they're probably overjoyed that they're sitting when they know that it'll all be worth it when Andrew Luck starts to pull an 05 Roethlisberger at the beginning of next season. Titans win big.<br />
SAINTS OVER VIKINGS<br />
The Saints can lock up the division title with a win over possibly the most cursed team in the NFL. That's really all you need to know about this game.<br />
GIANTS OVER REDSKINS<br />
If you're looking for another game to take the points on (if you're betting the spread), then look no further! The Redskins continue to be undervalued and the Giants continue to be overvalued, so this is really the perfect storm of an underdog cover. I still think the Giants win (the Redskins' defense is the proverbial turd in the punchbowl in this bet. Eli should have over 300 yards and two TDs this week.), but the score is gonna be a lot closer than people think.<br />
TEXANS OVER PANTHERS<br />
By the way, this column has now started to bleed in to Friday. This is promising. I might even finish this column before Eddy Curry puts half the lockout weight back on. In a related story, I thought it was a good idea to pick Carolina over Houston in a huge upset. Not a good idea. Yates still has a good week or two left until the crap hits the fan.<br />
LIONS OVER RAIDERS<br />
We always have one of those games late in the season where two teams that did well earlier start to decline and then have to play each other to determine which one will stay alive. I never like picking these games because it's impossible to determine which one is free-falling faster. I'm placing my bets on the Lions because I'm pretty sure it would be a felony to place money on the Raiders after their last two games.<br />
CARDINALS OVER BROWNS<br />
I can't think of anything interesting to write about this game. Sorry. Just know that I tried for like twenty minutes.<br />
PATRIOTS OVER BRONCOS<br />
I love picking one team over another for stupid reasons, and Rick Perry just gave me a great one by comparing himself to Tim Tebow. Forget about the fact that I don't think the Broncos can keep up with the Pats scoring wise, it's pretty much the kiss of death when George Bush III compares himself to you. Sorry Tebow.<br />
JETS OVER EAGLES<br />
I'm legitimately terrified of this game. An Eagles team that still has last gasp playoff hopes facing a Jets team that's tricking everybody in to believing they're good again (three games against Buffalo, Washington, and Kansas City will do that) is a really scary proposition. In a related story, we saw the exact same scenario in 2009. If you take a look at that Jets season and this one, the parallels are pretty scary for Jets fans. However, the Jets are roping me in again and I can't help it. 27-23 Jets. I suddenly feel sick.<br />
CHARGERS OVER RAVENS<br />
My actual upset pick of the week! This seems like the type of game that the Ravens are due to lose. They are outplaying their talent level by a good win or two, so it's about time that the Chargers submit one of those "dominating performance when they've already either locked up a first round bye or have been eliminated" that we're accustomed to seeing. Chargers knock off the Ravens.<br />
STEELER OVER NINERS<br />
I think the defenses in this game are relatively equal. As long as the Steelers don't completely dominate the Niners' offense (which I don't think they will), expect a defensive and physical struggle. However, the Steelers offense is better than the Niners offense by a little bit, and the Niners' inability to generate touchdowns in the red zone will ultimately be their downfall. As long as the Steelers' offense does not turn the ball over (which they might, the Niners are first in the league in give/take ratio), the score will be 17-12 Steelers.<br />
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</div>Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-91531137550236893232011-12-14T18:18:00.000-08:002011-12-16T04:50:14.817-08:00ONE MAN'S THOUGHTS ON THE BOWL SEASON<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Ever since Weeks 11 and 12 of the college football season, we knew this would happen. LSU wasn’t losing a game, Alabama wasn’t going to lose again, and everybody else might as well have not played their last few games. No matter how many “statements” that teams like Oklahoma State made (I guess beating a top 10 team 44-10 on a neutral field doesn’t qualify as enough of a statement), we knew that this was going to be an LSU-Alabama Championship. I can’t speak for everybody, but I hate this rematch. It was a mind-numbingly boring game the first time, and it looks to be that way again. An LSU-Oklahoma State championship would have been one of the most entertaining championships in recent history, the best offense in college football going up against one of the best defenses in college football. Instead, we all get treated to SnoreFest Part 2. I want to argue. I want to shout that it isn’t fair. I want to force them to make every single change that I wrote about in my Manifesto of College Football Reform (on my blog sportsaccordingtoslice.blogspot.com. Check it out to see some of my earlier columns). But, deep down inside, I really can’t argue this pick. I might hate it, but I can’t argue it. Why?<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> Because these are the two best teams</i>. Those are just the facts of it. With that piece of info in mind, here are some other assorted thoughts on this year’s bowl season in no particular order.</span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Before we get to anything else, it’s time for my rant about Boise State. I’m naturally biased towards any non-BCS team that’s good enough to make a BCS bowl, and Boise State just happens to fit the bill. But you can’t tell me that what they did to Boise State isn’t ridiculous (You know I feel strongly about something when I use a double negative). Any system where a team goes 11-1, gets the number 7 ranking, and not only doesn’t get in to the BCS, but gets stuck playing in an insignificant bowl game with six million dollars less of a payout than the Outback Bowl is flawed. I mention the Outback Bowl because that’s where Georgia is playing. You know, the Georgia that Boise State beat 35-21 in their own stadium on opening weekend? Let’s move on before I start smashing my head against my keyboard.</span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Quick insignificant note: how embarrassed are Ohio State and Florida fans that their teams are playing in the Taxslayer Bowl? Three years ago, if anybody would even dare to say “In three years, Florida and Ohio State will be 6-6 and playing each other in the Taxslayer Bowl”, that person would have been declared insane. Also, is it just me or does Taxslayer sound like the main character from some kind of bad video game parody? You’re right, it’s just me.</span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I know that I’ve briefly touched on this, but I want to make one rule for the media discussing the LSU-Alabama rematch. Please don’t refer to the first game as a “classic SEC matchup” or a “hard-hitting defensive game”. Oftentimes, those are just euphemisms that hide the fact that the game was awful. I watched the whole thing and at no point whatsoever did I ever say to myself “Wow, this is a good game”. Last year’s national championship was a defensive struggle because both sides of the ball played well, it’s just that the defense played better. LSU-Alabama was a completely different story. A combined total of 8-24 on third downs and a combined thirteen penalties for 129 yards is not a defensive struggle, that’s just sloppy football. </span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Since Alabama-LSU is a somewhat boring game for the championship rematch, the most interesting and otherwise significant bowl game is Stanford-Oklahoma State. It’s the last chance we get to see Andrew Luck before the combine, as well as top flight receiver Justin Blackmon for OSU. It’ll be Stanford’s balanced attack against Oklahoma State’s punishing offense. I’ll take that game over SnoreFest 2 any day of the week.</span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> I</span> love college football. If the NFL Lockout had happened, would I gladly give up college football to get it back? In the interest of full honesty, yes. Why do I still love this game? This excerpt from my Manifesto column should give a shortened version of just why; “Nowhere else can a quarterback throw for nine touchdowns like Case Keenum did last week. Nowhere else can you show up at any given stadium, no matter how crappy the team, and be assured that at least 90 percent of the stadium are diehard fans. Nowhere else can more than forty teams enter the season as contenders for a National Championship.”</span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>On January 9<sup><span style="font-size: x-small;">th</span></sup>, millions of people across America will tune in to watch the National Championship Game between the Alabama Crimson Tide and the LSU Tigers. And even though I don’t like the matchup, I’ll still be one of them.</span></div>Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-55611592300045584702011-12-02T08:48:00.000-08:002011-12-02T08:48:21.998-08:00Week 13 Super Quick Picks<div style="text-align: center;">This is gonna be a really short column. Maybe a couple sentences for each game. Don't like doing these, but I've got stuff to do this weekend. Also, I'll begin writing for SIKIDS soon. The things that I write for SI will not appear on the blog and vice versa. I strongly encourage all of my 20-25 readers to check out the SIKIDS blog. Let's get to the picks.</div><div style="text-align: center;">TEXANS OVER FALCONS</div><div style="text-align: center;">I can't wait to pick against Jake Delhomme in the playoffs. That said, the Texans are finally a good team. Expect a sloppy game by both teams (the Falcons are waaaaaay overdue for one) that the Texans win.</div><div style="text-align: center;">BILLS OVER TITANS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Just when you think the Titans are out, they pull you back in. And just when you think they're in, they throw you back out.</div><div style="text-align: center;">BEARS OVER CHIEFS</div><div style="text-align: center;">I've gotta say, the Bears were surprisingly good last week. They'll get a chance to rest this week before playing The Polarizing Tim Tebow. Bears win big.</div><div style="text-align: center;">BRONCOS OVER VIKINGS</div><div style="text-align: center;">It's (wait for it)....... (wait for it)...... (here it comes)..... TEBOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For all the credit that Tebow's been getting, nobody has been giving much credit to the Denver defense. It rose from 27th to 12th over the last few weeks. Put it this way, I think that even the Vikings fans might be rooting for Tebow at the end of this game.</div><div style="text-align: center;">PATRIOTS OVER COLTS</div><div style="text-align: center;">If the Patriots lose this game, I'm pretty sure it would involve a conspiracy to keep the Colts from getting the number one pick. Actually, that wouldn't be a bad idea. Think about it: you have your division locked up, you have nothing much to play for, and your biggest rival is the worst it's been for ages and without its hall of fame QB. Or is this a terrible idea? You're right, it's a terrible idea.</div><div style="text-align: center;">DOLPHINS OVER RAIDERS</div><div style="text-align: center;">The Dolphins are the sneaky good team that nobody wants to play right now. Vegas is just begging you to put money on the Raiders. Sorry, not falling for that one. You know, if I were in Vegas and not writing this from my school's library.</div><div style="text-align: center;">JETS OVER REDSKINS</div><div style="text-align: center;">I'm legitimately terrified of this game because when you think about it, this is Dolphins-Raiders to a lesser extent. A playoff-caliber team playing its worst (the Jets) facing a team that has nothing to lose and has a quarterback that has performed way too well for no logical reason (Rex Grossman)? Uh, let's just stop talking about this game before I have a panic attack.</div><div style="text-align: center;">PANTHERS OVER BUCS</div><div style="text-align: center;">I always place way too much faith in the Panthers because I believe in Cam Newton. The Panthers' defense would usually make me lean the other way, but the Bucs' offense has been so mistake-prone that I honestly believe the Panthers can give up less than 30 points.</div><div style="text-align: center;">RAVENS OVER BROWNS</div><div style="text-align: center;">I'd watch out for this game. The Browns almost upset the Bengals last week, and they'll keep it close with Baltimore for awhile. I would even make this my upset pick of the week, before realizing that picking against the Ravens D against crappy quarterbacks would result in my arrest and eventual banning from picking a game ever again.</div><div style="text-align: center;">COWBOYS OVER CARDINALS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Kevin Kolb might return on Sunday to face the Cowboys...... and nobody cares. I think that Kolb vs Skelton might be a legitimate debate for Cardinals fans at this point. Hey, it's not like the Cardinals gave up a good corner and a second round pick for him.</div><div style="text-align: center;">PACKERS OVER GIANTS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Is it finally time for the Giants collapse to begin? Every year, it's either the Giants or the Cowboys that fall short of expectations. I have a lot less faith in the Giants than I do the Cowboys, so the Giants are my collapse pick for the end of the season. For everybody that has Aaron Rodgers as their fantasy football QB, enjoy a nice fillet of the Giants defense.</div><div style="text-align: center;">NINERS OVER RAMS</div><div style="text-align: center;">I don't actually have to talk about the NFC West, do I? Let me answer my own question: NO.</div><div style="text-align: center;">SAINTS OVER LIONS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Lions, Bills, and at least one NFC East team. They're the collapsing standbys ever year. If you see any of these teams doing well, don't believe they're in the playoffs even for a second until they clinch. They should be two games worse than they are, with miracle comebacks against Dallas and Minnesota (2-9) preventing them from being 5-6. Meanwhile, the Saints are playing their best football of the year. Lions D surrenders four Brees touchdowns as the Lions win.</div><div style="text-align: center;">CHARGERS OVER JAGUARS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Is anybody else excited for a game between sub .500 teams with no playoff implications and two inept offenses? Anyone? No? I'm shocked.</div><div style="text-align: center;">Stay tuned for Week 14 next week.</div>Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-81882009427799155342011-11-25T09:40:00.000-08:002011-11-25T09:40:35.714-08:00NFL Week 12 Picks<div style="text-align: center;">After a two week hiatus of picks, I'm back. I finished a huge column on the first week and had a lot to do, so I couldn't write picks that week. Last week, Tebow's drive destroyed me (I'm still not quite over it) and I didn't feel like writing them either. However, it's time to get back to the picks. Quick disclaimer before I start the column: I don't pick the Thursday games. If I pick one game, I feel like I have to pick them all, and I don't have the time/ lack of homework needed to do that. Now that we've established that, on to the picks.</div><div style="text-align: center;">FALCONS OVER VIKINGS</div><div style="text-align: center;">I like the Vikings as a sleeper pick for next year. The defense is coming on strong, Ponder is developing in to a good quarterback, and Adrian Peterson is still a veritable monster. They absolutely could have won that Raiders game last week, but a multitude of turnovers and dumb penalties killed their chances. Now those are the Vikings that I know. Meanwhile, Atlanta played a good three quarters against the Titans before almost blowing it at the end. Since they're my Super Bowl Pick (I'll explain why in my NFL Postmortem column at the end of the season), I've gotta have faith in their ability to take care of businuess in home games like this.Falcons win 24-13.</div><div style="text-align: center;">JETS OVER BILLS</div><div style="text-align: center;">The Jets have only lost twice when I've went (2007 against Buffalo and 2010 against the eventual champ Green Bay). Let's just say that I'm not worried about this being the third time. The Jets are beginning to fall apart, but Buffalo just exploded. They rope us in to thinking they're a decent team every few years (2008 for instance), and then they implode down the stretch. Blowouts at the hands of the Jets, Cowboys, and Dolphins in the past three weeks have exposed the Bills as a facade. They may be 5-5, but they're already dead from a playoff perspective in my mind. Then again, so would the Jets if they didn't have three pushovers (Buffalo,Washington, and Kansas City) in the next few weeks. Add to the fact that Fred Jackson looks to be done for the year, and this is a 31-13 Jets win.</div><div style="text-align: center;">BENGALS OVER BROWNS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Due to the Jets' unfortunate playoff situation, I will be vehemently rooting against the Bengals for the rest of the year. It's a shame, because the Bengals are a likeable young team that has a QB with a cool nickname (Andy Dalton as the Red Rifle) and one of the most exciting wide receivers in the league (AJ Green). That said, they're no way that the Bengals blow an easy home game against a team that barely outlasted Jacksonville last week. The Browns rank 29th in total offense, and show no signs of an upward trend without Peyton Hillis (the Madden Curse strikes again!! I wonder whether the Madden Curse or the SI Cover Jinx has been more successful over the years. I'm wondering whether to be glad that Jets don't usually appear on the covers or bummed out because there isn't a single player on the team remotely exciting enough to make one.) Long story short, the Bengals should win this game handily. </div><div style="text-align: center;">TITANS OVER BUCS</div><div style="text-align: center;">A lot of things just haven't gone right for the Bucs this year. LaGarette Blount never really got rolloing until it was too late, Josh Freeman threw too many picks, and the defense couldn't even perform average, much less keep up with all of the offenses' turnovers. The Bucs took the Packers down to the wire last week, so we know how good they can be. The Titans are the exact opposite. You know you're getting a team that's pretty much as close to the word "average" as you'd ever hope to get in the NFL. They come close to beating some good teams, win handily some weeks, look like just another team in other weeks, you never know what you're getting from the Titans. I'll always pick the average team over the box of chocolates team (You never know what you're gonna get. I probably shouldn't be quoting Forrest Gump since I've never actually seen it), especially when the average team is playing at home. Titans win 20-17.</div><div style="text-align: center;">PANTHERS OVER COLTS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Can we at least say that the Panthers are the most entertaining 2-8 team that we've ever seen? What other 2-8 team do you know of has a soon to be top 10 QB and a top 5 wide receiver? I'm gonna go ahead and answer that for you; none. If the defense were just bad instead of complete trash (allowing over 28 points per game after the team spent close to 70 million dollars resigning "vital" members of the defense. I think that the other 31 teams can agree that it was worth every penny), the Panthers could have easily been 5-5 right now. Meanwhile, the Colts are in full Luck mode. Not only do they not have the talent to consider beating another NFL team right now, they have no incentive to do so with a sure thing looming in the draft. The Panthers win 28-17.</div><div style="text-align: center;">RAMS OVER CARDINALS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Do I really have to talk about this game? No? Fantastic.</div><div style="text-align: center;">TEXANS OVER JAGUARS </div><div style="text-align: center;">I would be genuinely shocked if the Texans lose this game. I honestly don't think that the injury of Schaub will change much of anything. They have the number one defense in the league in terms of yards per game, Arian Foster is a monster, and they haven't had Andre Johnson for all this time. Can you imagine what would have happened if the whole defense, Foster, Schaub, and Johnson stayed healthy throughout the season? I'm firmly convinced that they would be undefeated if that happened. Meanwhile, the Jags are just building towards next year at this point. Remember when the Jags used to be the most exciting team in football with two great running backs and an entertaining defense (2007)? Me too. I miss those days. Fortunately, the Texans have all of that and more. This is the lock of the week, 35-10 Texans.</div><div style="text-align: center;">RAIDERS OVER BEARS</div><div style="text-align: center;">And this is what I meant in my preseason power poll about the 2010 Bears. Those Bears possibly had the luckiest season in the past decade. No significant injuries, terrible schedule, good turnover differential, won too many close games that they could have easily lost, went 11-5 and got the 2 seed in the NFC (fairly sure we're not seeing that again), got Seattle at home in the divisional round, and nearly beating the Packers in the conference championshpis after getting every conceivable break. You knew that the Bears' luck had to swing in the other direction sometime, right? Well, this is that sometime. I kinda feel bad for them because they were having a great season without the kind of luck that they got last year, and then Caleb Hanie has to ride in and save the day. You're not gonna believe this, but I don't believe in Hanie. Meanwhile, the Raiders get to play in the worst division in football and catch the Bears at the perfect time. Sounds like a 10 point win to me.</div><div style="text-align: center;">Raiders win 20-10.</div><div style="text-align: center;">SEAHAWKS OVER REDSKINS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Can I interest you in a game between sub .500 teams with absolutely no interesting subplots whatsoever? I can't? Fantastic.</div><div style="text-align: center;">BRONCOS OVER CHARGERS</div><div style="text-align: center;">I believe in Tebow now. Not by choice. When you look at this game closely, isn't this exactly the kind of game that Tim Tebow always pulls out? A talented team that hasn't met expectations, can't finish games, and is prone to dumb turnovers and penalties faces off against the Broncos. The score is something like "13-10 Chargers" in the final three minutes. The Chargers have dominated all game, except for a special teams fumble and two picks by Rivers. To be honest, that's exactly how I expect this game to play out. And then Tebow drives the Broncos down the field for a game ending touchdown as Rich Eisen points out once again that "the standings don't have pictures on them". Has any team won in more perplexing ways than the Broncos have over the past few weeks? Has any team found more ways to lose a football game than San Diego? No and no. Broncos win 17-13.</div><div style="text-align: center;">PATS OVER EAGLES</div><div style="text-align: center;">One of the more interesting games of Week 12 is between two preseason Super Bowl Favorites. Personally, I can't think of any conceivable way that the Eagles win with Vince as the quarterback. All week long, all I heard from analysts and talk show hosts was "Here come the Eagles!" and "Should we start Vince over Vick for the rest of the year?" chatter. First of all, the Eagles would pretty much need to win out to approach the playoffs, and the Pats are hitting their stride late in the season. Second of all, here is Vince's statline from the Giants game.</div><div style="text-align: center;">Vince Young: 23-38, 258 Yards, 2 TDs, 3 INTs, 69.0 QB rating</div><div style="text-align: center;">Not quite sure that warrants "starting QB" talk yet. Also, the three picks against a woeful Giants' secondary is somewhat alarming. The Eagles defense will need to play the game of its life against Brady and the Pats offense. I think it can hold Brady to a reasonable amount of yardage, but BenJarvus Green-Ellis has a field day with over 100 yard and at least two touchdowns against a physically inferior Eagles' front seven. 30-24 Pats.</div><div style="text-align: center;">STEELERS OVER CHIEFS</div><div style="text-align: center;">Palko, meet Polamalu, Harrison, and Timmons. Timmons, Harrison, and Polamalu, meet Tyler Palko.</div><div style="text-align: center;">SAINTS OVER GIANTS </div><div style="text-align: center;"> The Giants have holes all over their offense right now. The offensive line is a mess with Will Beaty out, leading to the porous run blocking given to Brandon Jacobs. Jacobs will likely be in again on Monday Night after new broke that Ahmad Bradshaw did not practice yet again, raising severe doubt about his status for Monday Night's game. Another game in which a team was caught at the perfect time. The Saints are well rested, having just come off of their bye week. Expect the Saints to come out with their best effort of the year and the Giants to come out with their worst. Saints win 38-21.</div><div style="text-align: center;">I'll be back with Week 13 next week. Hasta le Vista everybody.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</div>Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-57760351147356684182011-11-08T17:18:00.000-08:002011-11-16T03:11:26.458-08:00The Manifesto of College Football ReformThe most addictive thing on the planet is power. Look through an average history textbook and you'll find plenty of examples. Power only causes a want for even more authority, more control. Such is the case in the college football system. There are so many problems with the current system that I probably can't list them all, but they have one unmistakable trait in common. One thing that anybody who has heard any reports about reallignment and/or read the first three sentences of this article knows. They all trace their roots back to a want for power. Re-allignment, the BCS structure, and rampant cheating in college sports can all be traced back to the power struggle between conferences, TV Networks, and various individual schools. Fortunately, there are common sense solutions to all of these problems that I've spent way too much time thinking about. Why? Because I love college football. I can't emphasize this enough. Nowhere else can a quarterback throw for nine touchdowns like Case Keenum did last week. Nowhere else can you show up at any given stadium, no matter how crappy the team, and be assured that at least 90 percent of the stadium are die hard fans (not fairweather fans, not "I'll only go if I can sit in a luxury box" wimp fans. If you watch a college game and an NFL game in succession, you'll see what I mean). Nowhere else can more than fourty teams enter the season as contenders for a National Championship. Unfortunately, the system is flawed because it is manipulated by agents, boosters, athletic directors, and others that are far more cunning than the nineteen year old athletes that they stand to make money from. Since all of these problems are directly related (except for cheating, which is a problem apart from the others), let's start with the BCS System.<br />
BCS BUSTED<br />
Ah, the BCS. The topic of so much debate over the years seemingly has no solution. A quick review of the arguments before we break down the inadequacies of the current system, the BCS is supported by a system of coach's polls and computer formulas that determine bowl games and, most importantly, which two teams should play in the National Championship Game.. BCS supporters argue that the current system is absolutely fine. They say that the National Championship should be between the best teams that play the toughest schedules and that it gives the regular season more weight because every season is like a playoff. BCS detractors argue that teams that aren't part of the Royal and Ancient (named after Augusta's members) of college football (TCU and Boise State in recent years) are unfairly treated. They say that a playoff is the only answer to the question of Who is the Best Team? After a while, so many columnists and bloggers have an opinion on the subject that we forget what we're even arguing about and end up simply insulting each other without coming up with solutions. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing I love more than a good trash talking session, but it gets to a point where it fails to be funny any more and ends up as annoying and counter-productive. <br />
My take on the BCS is that it had a little bit of the right idea. After all, it doesn't make sense that Boise State should be able to whipsaw through an easy schedule and emerge undefeated and play in the title game while Florida might lose twice to LSU and Alabama and end up playing in the ShakeWeight Bowl against Akron. However, it has been morphed from a noble effort to determine the most fair way to choose a national champion to a cash grab for the nation's top historical teams. This is how you end up with a team that went 0-12 in 2009 (Washington) earning more BCS money than a team that went undefeated in that same year (the Sugar Bowl Champion, Utah). According to an article written by Brian Murphy, each automatic qualifying conference takes home roughly 22 million dollars. A total of approximately 25 million dollars is split among the five non-qualifying conferences. See what I mean about a cash grab now? If greedy athletic directors or BCS officials recognized Boise State or TCU as legitimate teams that should play in AQ conferences, their pockets would suddenly start to feel a little bit lighter. There is absolutely a caste system in college football, and teams that are unfortunate enough to have just become good recently are still at the bottom. Not only should the cash grab be ended (remember, wealth and power are the two most addictive things on the planet), but it is an unfair way of choosing a National Champion. The result is that fewer and fewer teams are scheduling the "tough games" that supposedly give the BCS schools a huge advantage over non-BCS schools because they know that they can't sniff the National Championship with one loss. Inversely, teams like Boise State are constantly saddled with crappy schedules (so the computers and polls can again point to lack of schedule strength) with one marquee opponent thrown in (in hopes that they'll lose and the representation problem will be put to rest for another year). The BCS was an honest attempt at proving who was the best that was corrupted when unequal money distribution and the very notion of computers and coaches' polls were added.<br />
Every single "BCS sucks!" person wants a playoff. Everything should be centered around a playoff. Playoff, playoff, playoff. First, let's ask ourselves two quick questions. The first one is; how would playoffs for the top teams work? It's a heck of a lot easier to schedule one game than potentially three (for an eight team playoff), plus there's the issue of logistics. Bowls are scheduled at a bit of a dicey time, with Winter Break and final exams looming within a few weeks of each other. It's very easy to schedule one game, but two or three with a week's break in between each? That's a logistical nightmare before you even get to travel planning and the like. Second of all, a college football playoff will be just like the BCS. How, you ask? With the BCS, there is usually an undefeated team that does not get to play for the National Championship. With a playoff, the undefeated teams can duke it out. OK, that's great. Now how do you propose chosing the one loss teams that get in to the playoff? We still have the same problem as before, just in a different form. So what's the solution? Keep the BCS. <br />
What? But Andrew, you said you'd come up with a new solution! Well, I did. Take a deep breath. I'm going to put the next part in italics because it's super important. Ready? Here we go.<em> We can have the BCS and a playoff at the same time.</em> How? Through strength of schedule reform. First of all, take any and all power that athletic directors have or ever considered having in terms of making the schedule out of their hands. Let them whine about it. They'll live. Then, the conferences will be fixed so that there are no good teams in crappy conferences that can't play any significant in-conference games (more on that plan in the realignment section). Then, establish a hierarchy where performance over the past few years dictates what kind of schedule you have to play out of conference. This way, teams like Ohio State can't schedule patsies in out of conference play to get easy wins. After I break up the SEC a little bit (it pains me to have to do it, but the SEC is so far above everyone else it's ridiculous. Something needs to be done), the talent level in between the conferences won't be that uneven. That way, good teams always play the toughest opponents from their own conference. As for out of conference, have different levels of schedule toughness. For instance, if you're Alabama, you would get the toughest schedule, we'll call it a Class 5 Schedule, because you've had a great deal of success in recent years. A class 5 schedule might dictate playing at four pre-season top thirty five teams (top twenty five seems a bit too extreme), including at least one top five team. Class 4 would be somebody like an LSU who is great now, but has only been very good in recent years, etc. College football advertises that every week is a playoff when it isn't, now every week would be a playoff. Also, take all votes away from coaches and computers. They will not be settling this debate. All votes should go to studio analysts who actually have time to watch every game and can judge for themselves who is the best. Not only would they not have a bias, they would absolutely have more general knowledge about every team in the country than most coaches. The answer to the BCS money problem will be explained later in the realignment section. Under this plan, the BCS people would still be happy because they get to keep their bowl system. Playoff advocates would be happy because strength of schedule wouldn't matter nearly as much any more and good non-AQ teams would get to prove that they belong. Look, this system is not perfect, but it's as close as you can get to a perfect way of determining a national champion fairly and equitibly. If anybody has a reason why this should not happen, I urge them to tell me why. Until then, I can see no good reason not to carry out this plan.<br />
REALIGN THIS<br />
Realignment is not a new college football phenomenon. Contrary to popular belief, NCAA officials do not all gather in one room with a giant roulette wheel, pull out random colleges, and spin the wheel to see what conference they end up in (although that definitely seems plausible given the events of the past year). No, realignment has been happening since the beginning of college football. Usually, it's a moderate change designed to strengthen conferences and make sure that everything is geographically in the right place. In that context, realignment is one of the best things to happen in your sport. However, this is an unprecedented type of realignment spurred by negative things. First of all, we have never seen this many teams jump ship to different conferences. It all starts with some college becoming ticked off that another college just signed its own network deal or that conference's commissioner says the Big 12 is doomed, it could be whatever. Some people, who I assume have no respect for the traditions of the game, say that realignment is good. It leads to a playoff, more conference championships, and more revenue. All that you need to do is block out everything else and keep focusing on those dollar signs. <br />
Then, there are the people that hate it, AKA Me. I know that this is technichally a complex issue with many different opinions and angles, but it's about as black and white to me as anything. The whole reason why we have conferences is to group teams by geography. If you're not going to do that any more, why have conferences? Better yet, why not just put Alabama, Ohio State, LSU, Oklahoma, USC, and all the other most prestigious teams in to one conference? Sounds crazy, right? Well, it's not that much of a stretch. We've already gotten over the biggest obstacle to this happening, which is people caring about what makes geographical sense. The initial exodus from the Big 12 never needed to happen. The exiting schools had legitimate complaints that Texas was getting preferential treatment, and they were right. However, Big 12 comissioner Dan Baby (real name: Dan Beebe) continued to do everything but give important speeches while making the Hook 'Em Horns sign. The NCAA refused to do anything about this, and now they seem genuinely shocked that everybody wants to jump ship. OK, the first realignment could have been easily stopped, but it at least made sense. Suddenly, Pitt and Syracuse are leaving for the ACC, which would be a great idea if they both weren't at least 300 miles from the ocean. This seems significant because, you know, it is called the Atlantic Coastal Conference. Why did that need to happen? Why exactly did the Big East need to break up? Why didn't anybody have the foresight to nip the Big 12 Problems in the bud before it grew unmanagable. Why? Why!?!?!?!?!?!?<br />
Here's the solution, and it's gonna be a doozy. First, seperate football and non-football conference alignment, since it's clear that top universities care 10X more about football than any other college sport, except for basketball in some schools. Next, restore everything to geographical order. If this were to happen, and I hope it will some day, the conferences would shake out like this (some conferences would have ten teams, some would have twelve, based on concentration of quality teams in a particular part of the country. Every conference would have a championship.)<br />
SEC: LSU, Ole Miss, Missisippi State, Alabama, Auburn, Florida, Florida State, Miami, Tennessee, Georgia<br />
ACC: Vanderbilt, Georgia Tech, South Carolina, Clemson, North Carolina, Wake Forest, Duke, NC State, Virginia, Maryland, Virginia Tech, Navy<br />
Big East: Rutgers, Connecticut,Cincinatti, West Virginia, Syracuse, Pittsburgh, Louisville, Kentucky, Army, Boston College<br />
Midwestern Conference (formerly known as Big Ten): Ohio State, Michigan, Michigan State, Indiana, Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Northwestern, Iowa, Purdue, Notre Dame, Penn State<br />
Big 12: Arkansas, Missouri, Kansas, Kansas State, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, Nebraska, Texas, Texas Tech, Texas A&M, TCU, Colorado<br />
PAC-12: Boise State, Arizona, Arizona State, USC, Cal, Stanford, Oregon, Oregon State, UCLA, Washington, Washington State, Utah<br />
Independents: South Florida, Baylor, Iowa State, BYU<br />
With a few exceptions (such as making South Florida go independent to reduce the SEC to ten teams), each move I made makes geographical sense. The independent teams are that way because there is simply not enough space in each conference for everything to make sense, so they are independent for the time being. However, I am including a clause that says if an independent team (or a team from a non-AQ conference, which includes every conference not listed above plus the independents) performs exceptionally well over a select period of time, then they can move up from a non-AQ conference to an AQ conference. The team that has consistently performed the worst over that same time period will fall down to a non-AQ conference. This way, good teams from the Mountain West, Independents, or even Conference USA can have a chance to play the top teams if they deserve it, while teams that do terribly in AQ conferences are relegated to the "minor leagues" for a while. This also solves the inequity in money distribution between BCS conferences and non BCS conferences. If you become good enough to be a part of a power conference, then you earn the BCS money that befits your status as one of the elite in college football. If you're terrible for too long in a power conference, then you don't deserve to get that BCS money. Not only were the conferences just un-realigned, but the money distribution was just solved too. Also, another way was just found for good non-BCS teams to compete with the top brass of college football. It's somewhat scary that university presidents haven't thought of this stuff yet.<br />
BCS BOOSTED?<br />
And now we've come to the skeleton in college football's closet. When the Miami scandal broke over the Summer, everybodyn seemed shocked. Every news entity and website started printing column and news features with ominous titles like "How Far Has it Gone?" or "The Untold Story of College Football's Underworld". OK, I might have made the last one up. But they were all creepy titles that could easily have been transplanted in to a political action thriller along the lines of "State of Play". I, on the other hand, was shocked that it took so long for everyone to notice. Cheating isn't anytyhing new. The most sever case was the use of the death penalty against SMU and the Pony Express backfield, but that's hardly the only case. Within the past decade, every team in the SEC except Vanderbilt has committed some kind of major rules violation. Many of them have committed several. Why? Well, let's start with school revenue. College football's total profit topped a billion dollars last year for the first time in its history. The largest cut of that revenue went to Texas, whose profit topped 65 million dollars (on a side note, TCU, the rose bowl winner, only made 20 million dollars in total profit. That's barely enough to break even). Inequity? You tell me. Meanwhile, college football players don't get paid. Only the players who are good enough to make it to the NFL have an incentive to play well, and that incentive is related to the NFL and not to their college. On the one hand, I think it's ridiculous that college kids should be paid to play a game. On the other hand, the school is making money off of them, They should get some kind of benefit.<br />
The NCAA has recently passed historic measures to combat the spread of cheating and boosterism. These measures call for giving each player a $2,000 stipend every year. I can already tell that's not going to be enough. The solution to this problem is very simple, players do not get paid unless the wealth is spread between all universities and a seperate pool is established for player funding. 2,000 dollars is chump change compared to the illegal benefits that sleazy agents and boosters supply players with. Unless we can find some type of revenue sharing method or other way that players can take home a significant amount, then the illegal benefits paid to the top players will far outstrip the stipend. I don't have the answers for how to attack the base of the problem, but I can solve the product of that problem; cheating. My plan would be very simple. The death penalty is not to be used unless the words "program wide conspiracy" or "felonies" are being thrown around. Instead, why not give players and teams half-death penalties? Making a constantly cheating team regret their decision by not allowing them to field a competitive team would cripple them, but not hurt the whole conference. For example, my punishment for Miami would be a 5 year bowl ban and a proviso that restricts them from contacting recruits rated by private agencies above three out of five stars (or whatever rating system they use). This ban can be lifted after three years if Miami has no violations of any kind in their sports programs. For the individual players accepting these deals, suspensions and fines are satisfactory for minor offenses. For major violations, their actions will affect their team and their future. For example, some offenses might warrant a bowl ban for the team or a two year long ban for a player. In extreme cases, an offense could warrant a player not being able to play football in the NCAA or NFL ever. Now no booster with half a brain would dare try to tamper with the athletes, lest he risk losing a valuable player for his own university or NFL team. This is a simple yet effective response to cheating in the NCAA.<br />
These are all simple solutions to huge problems, and they might not be the best. But at least it's something, which is very much needed in a college football climate where we have nothing in the way of long term solutions.Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-54132115578942109912011-11-04T16:16:00.000-07:002011-11-04T16:16:59.943-07:00NFL WEEK 9 SUPER QUICK PICKS<div style="margin: 0px;">I have too much homework to do this weekend, so I've gotta go through these really quick. For those of you who feel betrayed, don't worry. There will be a huge college football column coming in a week or so. For now, here are the quick picks.</div><div style="margin: 0px;">FALCONS OVER COLTS The Falcons are beginning to find their stride after a poor showing early in the season. There is nothing to be said for a team as sucky as the Colts right now, but it does show how much of an impact Peyton Manning had. 11-5 and division champs with him to candidate for 0-16 without him? Geez.</div><div style="margin: 0px;">JETS OVER BILLS I am definitely being a homer here, but I actually believe that the Jets can pull this one off. The Jets are coming off the bye playing a team that has thrived on turnovers and big plays. The problem with thriving on turnovers and big plays is that there are games where you don't get them. So far this season, the Bills haven't done so well when they don't get turnovers. As long as Mark Sanchez does not do anything stupid, this is absolutely a winnable game for the Jets.</div><div style="margin: 0px;">TEXANS OVER BROWNS Both the Texans and the Browns rank among the top seven in both scoring defenses and total defenses. Did we ever think that would happen? Ever? In a million years? Just nod your head no. The only difference is, the Texans offense is competent. The Browns offense, well, um, Colt McCoy speaks for himself.</div><div style="margin: 0px;">CHIEFS OVER DOLPHINS Ugh, the Chiefs have lucked in to some garbage victories this year. Carson Palmer's first game in Oakland, Phillip Rivers dropping the ball on the final kneel down (no joke), and the comeback win over the Colts. This is going to be another one of those years where everything breaks just right for the Chiefs (I would say the Raiders instead, but nothing good ever happens to the Raiders) and just wrong for the Chargers. Get ready for win number five in a row for the Chiefs over a tanking Dolphins team.</div><div style="margin: 0px;">BUCS OVER SAINTS This is one of the reasons that I'm only in the 75 percentile on ESPN.com. I overreact waaaay too much to the past week's performance. I know it shouldn't be this way, but I'm a fervent believer that a team is only as good as their last week's performance, and the Saints crapped their pants last week (especially the defense, who might have given up by the end of the game). Also, never underestimate a team coming off the bye. Bucs win.</div><div style="margin: 0px;">NINERS OVER REDSKINS The Niners are exactly the type of team that I would want if I were a head coach. These guys always do just enough to win, get their yards 4 or 5 at a time, never let up a big play, and control time of possession. And the Redskins are exactly the team that would give me a heart attack if I were a coach. Then again, Dan Snyder would give me a stroke before I even saw the team. Niners win big.</div><div style="margin: 0px;">BENGALS OVER TITANS I'm finally sold on the Bengals. It took some time, but the Bengals are finally being recognized as a legitimate team. I never thought I'd say this, but the defense (who would have thought?) is coming on strong, also in the top five in total defense. As for the Titans, they are a slightly better than average team that can't beat contenders. I'm not quite sure that the Bengals are contenders yet, but I'm willing to consider them semi-contenders if they can beat the Titans (it's a tougher game than you might think). And I never thought I'd say that about the Bengals.<br />
RAIDERS OVER BRONCOS Get ready for the worst game of the week! Also, get ready for the two "really terrible quarterbacks that get way more media coverage than they should because they were big names at one time" guys. This seems like one of those games where Tebow suddenly catches fire in the fourth quarter and starts spewing out lucky throws that somehow hit the target every time. However, I don't think that will be this game. I bought in to Tebow Mania a little bit (OK, that's a lie, it was a lot. It led me to ideas like "Hey, I think Denver could upset Detroit this week". Undoubtedly one of my most embarassing moments in my history of NFL Picks), but now I'm buying out. The Raiders win big.<br />
PACKERS OVER CHARGERS Does anything ever go right for the Chargers? Ever? I thought it was bad enough that Tebow and the Broncos almost beat them, but a fumbled snap on a kneel down? That just stuck a fork in the Chargers for the next few weeks. Let's just say that I don't like their chances going up against Aaron Rodgers and the Packers.<br />
RAMS OVER CARDINALS Rams win. Let's just move on from this game before I collapse on my keyboard.<br />
GIANTS OVER PATRIOTS Yes, I'm a homer. Don't judge me. However, I do actually have a reasonable explanation for this one. It boils down to the simple fact that the Patriots' pass defense is awful. I can't even express how terrible it is. It seemed like every single play, a different wide receiver was open for the Steelers. It was honestly the most terrible performance from a single unit on offense or defense since the Jets' travesty of a line in Baltimore. Also, Eli Manning's been having a pretty good year. No, really. He has. I'm not kidding anybody. Since Ahmad Bradshaw went down, the Giants are going to be forced to throw a lot. I say the Giants win a shootout 45-42.<br />
STEELERS OVER RAVENS Two teams going in opposite directions meet in a divisional clash. The Ravens lost to the Jags and nearly lost to the Cardinals. That's more than a little alarming. Again, I'm not jumping off the Ravens bandwagon quite yet. I do, however, have renewed confidence in the Steelers. This goes back to my Week 1 column about not bailing on your picks too early. Well, I was half right (I can be occasionally). The Steelers' defense stymies Joe Flacco as Pittsburgh gets a crucial division win.<br />
EAGLES OVER BEARS Don't look now, but the Eagles are starting to turn things around. I didn't really count their win over the Redskins, but a thrashing of Dallas last week was somewhat impressive. It will be a crucial test for the Eagles, a team with some fragile momentum, to take on the Bears. How the Eagles handle Matt Forte will be the key to the game. I don't think the Eagles can handle Forte, but they'll do everything else (running, and pass defense namely) just good enough to eke out a win and get back to .500. Eagles 24-23.</div>Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-35120695455101776872011-10-29T14:07:00.000-07:002011-10-29T14:25:12.196-07:00NFL Quick HitsI dont have the time to do a full game, so allow me just a few quick thoughts on each game along with my picks.<br />
COLTS OVER TITANS I'm beginning to wonder if 15+ years of Andrew Luck is worth degrading your dignity this much. In other news the Titans have been exposed as pretenders that have benefited from an easy schedule as well as a week two win over Baltimore in which the Ravens gave a C- effort after an emotional win over Pittsburgh. Still, the Titans win this one and Chris Johnson owners might finally get some production this week.<br />
SAINTS OVER RAMS I can't think of a team that's more helpless than the Rams right now. They can't even Suck for Luck because they already have Sam Bradford at QB. Can the Saints win by more than 40 again? No. But it is in play. Saints win big.<br />
GIANTS OVER DOLPHINS Wow, the early games really suck this week. The first three picks of the week involve over .500 teams playing the only three winless teams left in the NFL. Parity isn't dead yet, but it's at least in the hospital right now. Giants win big.<br />
PANTHERS OVER VIKINGS And the first semi-interesting game of the week is between two last place teams. I do like what I saw from Christian Ponder last week. No, he didn't unleash the "I just whipped a pass five yards over a wide open guy" face that he trademarked at Florida State, but he did come close in the last drive. I actually liked what I saw from him. Composed, made good decisions with the football (for the most part), and he didn't try to win the game by himself. Of course, I like what I'm seeing from Cam Newton way more. Panthers win 23-17.<br />
RAVENS OVER CARDINALS 4 awful games in the first 5! We're on pace for a record. The Steelers-Pats and Eagles-Cowboys games better be great to make up for this mess. The Ravens didn't show up yet again last week in an embarassing 12-7 loss to Jacksonville. Of course, Chris Berman (Definitely in my top three favorite broadcasters of all time) subscribes to the theory that one time is a mistake, two times is a trend, three times is a problem. I'm not jumping off the Ravens bandwagon yet, but I'm close. Ravens win 21-17.<br />
TEXANS OVER JAGUARS And we're 5 for 6!!!! Can Roger Goodell call an emergency meeting to completely reshuffle this whole week? Please? And while we're here, did anybody luck out more than the Jags last week? If they got the Ravens that the Jets had to play (Yes, I'm a homer), it would have been 38-7. Possibly higher. My point is, the Texans are gonna light the Jags up like a Christmas Tree. 31-10 is the final.<br />
REDSKINS OVER BILLS My first upset pick of the week is the Redskins over the Bills. I'm still not buying the Bills, they're a decent offense and a terrible defense benefiting from an average schedule (wins over Kansas City, Oakland, and Philly) and a lucky win over a marquee division opponent (a win over New England in which they trailed by 21 and Tom Brady threw four picks. I'm between 95 and 100 precent sure that's never going to happen again). I smell one of those "Easily winnable games that both teams don't show up for" games. 10-6 Redskins.<br />
BRONCOS OVER LIONS BANG!! Upset pick number two! I'm getting off the Lions bandwagon until Stafford is completely healthy and Best comes back. Until then, the Lions are operating with the worst running back corps in the league and a quarterback that's one sack away from being out for the season (Not joking, the possibility definitely exists). I don't believe in Tebow, but this should be another game where neither team shows up and the final score is something like 7-6. I hate Week 8.<br />
BENGALS OVER SEAHAWKS I'm starting to like the Bengals' offense. Dalton and Green are starting to develop timing and chemistry skills that are essential for an offense to work. The Seahawks, on the other hand, well uh, dont have that. T-Jax and Charlie Whitehurst wouldn't know timing if it hit them in the face. Bengals win by two scores. My god Week 8 sucks.<br />
NINERS OVER BROWNS Everybody is calling this game an upset special, and that's my queue to go against it. Also, I feel like people are calling this game an upset because there's nothing else to call an upset. I mean, did you see the Browns last week? That's possibly the worst showing a team has ever given in a win. Now they have to travel to the West Coast to play a Niners team coming off the bye. Niners win big. Ugh, Week 8 is still awful.<br />
STEELERS OVER PATRIOTS One of the two good games in Week Eight along with Eagles-Cowboys. It might be just me or my bias, but the Pats look relatively beatable this year. They dominated last year because they controlled the clock and obliterated everyone else in the turnover margin, not to mention they were great on Third Down. I don't really see that from this year's Pats. Are they good? Absolutely. But, I think that the Steelers finally break their losing streak to the Pats by keeping the chains moving and getting a few big turnovers. Steelers edge the Pats 27-23.<br />
EAGLES OVER COWBOYS I was never sold on the Eagles (refer to my column on them after the Asomugha signing as proof), but I've also never been sold against them. I never thought that they would be the indestructible super team that everybody thought they wuold be, but I've picked with them more times than against them this year. It's kind of like holding bad cards in a Poker game and trying to win big money just bluffing through the round. This pick is the equivalent of going all in with a pair of twos. Eagles win 20-17 after a game killing pick by Romo.<br />
CHARGERS OVER CHIEFS I'm still not buying the Chiefs. If they pull out a win over the Chargers, that would go a long way towards winning the AFC West and, who knows, I might even believe in them a little. However, I don't think that will happen. Chargers win 23-14.Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-77917211667727474082011-10-22T16:16:00.000-07:002011-10-22T16:16:13.216-07:00Welcome to Week 7Sorry for not writing a column last week, I had a lot of work to do. Also, I'm lazy. It's too bad, because I went 11-2 with my picks last week. I know it's difficult to believe, but it happened. Anyways, here are your picks for Week 7 of the NFL.<br />
LIONS OVER FALCONS I believe in the Lions almost as much as I still don't believe in the Falcons ( a win over the Panthers really did nothing to change my point of view). The Lions, for the first time since their Week 1 win over Tampa, did not play a complete game and they still almost beat the third best team in the NFC. That's an essential trait that a playoff team needs to have, the ability to win without playing their best. It's a skill that the Falcons obviously don't have (and might not develop for the rest of the season). Lions win 30-17.<br />
BEARS OVER BUCS Ladies and Gentlemen, it's the NFL in London! I always love the International series for a variety of reasons. The fans never quite know how to react to two teams they don't care about, the turf is a mess and slows the games down, and most of the time it's rainy. Actually, on second thought, I hate the International Series (at least in London). The Bears fixed a lot of their issues in a dominating win in Minnesota last week, and I wouldn't be surprised of the Bucs suffer a hangover after a big win against New Orleans. I'm picking the Bears in an upset.<br />
BROWNS OVER SEAHAWKS Do I have any confidence at all in Charlie Whitehurst? Uh, no. Any confidence in him being better than Tarvaris Jackson? It's a tough call. I guess my point in all of this is that if the QB you're starting this week has no value over T-Jax, things have gone horribly wrong for you. I think the Browns crawl back to .500 as Peyton Hillis guts out his injury to rush for his first 100 yard game of the season.<br />
DOLPHINS OVER BRONCOS It's TEBOOOOOOW!!!!! Geez, for all the antipathy towards Tebow in the offseason (they made him seem like a cross between Ryan Leaf and JaBustus Russell), things have certainly changed. I was on the bus home talking about fantasy football with Ray, and he spent 10 minutes trying to sell me on Tim Tebow being his starting fantasy quarterback for the rest of the year. No, seriously. That conversation happened. I couldn't believe it. The guy can't pass, and his biggest strength, according to NFL Scouts, is salvaging busted plays. Essentially, he needs the called play to fail for him to succeed. HE NEEDS THE PLAY TO FAIL FOR HIM TO SUCCEED. Does that sound like a quality starting QB to you? Throw in the fact that the Dolphins' D (who can still overperform against struggling offenses) can still get after the quarterback (as long as the O-Line sucks, in which case Denver is a godsend) and you have an underdog. Overall, this is just about as interesting as a Week Seven matchup between two teams with a combined one win is going to get. Dolphins win 23-14.<br />
TITANS OVER TEXANS I'm going with another upset pick this week. The Titans. Never underestimate the power of a team coming off the bye. They have a full two weeks to get healthy and work out any kinks that might still be causing problems. In the Titans' case, that means improving a porous secondary that surrendered five touchdowns to Ben Roethlisberger and the Steelers' receiving corps. The Titans also have to work on getting the running game rolling. The offensive line has not lived up to pre-season expectations, and Chris Johnson is having an anti-contract year (a self-invented term for when somebody signs a big contract and then "suffers" (cough, cough) a "dip in effort, I mean, production"). Without Andre Johnson, the Texans' offense is forced to run through Arian Foster to some extent, and the Ravens made them pay for it. The Titans take definitive control of the division with a big win in this one.<br />
JETS VS CHARGERS The Jets, like the Bears, fixed a few of their issues in a 24-6 win over the tanking Miami Dolphins (Suck for Luck is really up in the air between the Dolphins, Rams, and Colts). However, many issues still remain. The chief problem that still needs to be fixed is a lack of discipline on defense. Missed tackles and overpursuing was a huge problem for the Jets all night. They will need to be ironed out before facing the Explosive Chargers' Offense. Really, I don't have a lot of confidence in the Chargers. Their four wins came against teams that, combined, have just as many wins as the Chargers. In those games, dumb turnovers and red zone issues were huge problems for San Diego, and I don't expect them to get better. Jets win 17-14.<br />
PANTHERS OVER REDSKINS The weekly edition of "Game that there is nothing interesting to comment on". Well, except for one thing. If you're substituting John Beck in for Rex Grossman, something has gone terribly horribly wrong. I'm picking the Panthers to finally win.<br />
CHIEFS OVER RAIDERS Who assigns the values to NFL Players in trades? I've always wanted to know this. Who on Earth thought that Carson Palmer was still worth one, possibly two first round picks? Who? Not only that, but reports are starting to leak that Palmer might not even start this week. Nice job, Mark Davis. The apple fell about three inches from the tree on that one. I'm picking the Raiders to win this game just because I think the Chiefs are much closer to what we saw in Week One than what we saw in their past two wins. The Raiders get a win, but their playoff hopes as far as I'm concerned were dropped in to a pit as soon as Jason Campbell went down. <br />
STEELERS OVER CARDINALS The Cardinals' season has been both encouraging and depressing. We've seen some good things from Kolb and Fitzgerald, but not as much as we thought we would. The Cards have shown signs of being an OK team (going up big on the Giants), but they haven't been able to produce any wins (1-4, including a fourth quarter collapse to the Giants). On the other hand, the Steelers look like they're regaining their swagger after beating Jacksonville and reclaiming their position as one of the AFC's elite. The Steelers only have one or two tough games left on their schedule, so it's entirely plausible that they could finish 13-3 with the AFC's top seed. Steelers easily beat the Cardinals after a four pick day from Kolb.<br />
COWBOYS OVER RAMS It's happening again. The annual talk about "Hey, what's up with the Cowboys?" is in full swing, sure to be led on NFL Gameday Morning by Michael Irvin.<br />
Irvin: " (imagine in a loud, annoyingly raspy voice)THE COWBOYS NEED TO PLAY PHYSICAL TODAY! THE COWBOYS NEED TO MAKE BIG PLAYS IN BIG SITUATIONS!!!!! (Rest of speech unintelligible. Might be coughing up sandpaper stuck in throat)"<br />
Every single year, it seems like every analyst in America has a new opinion on the Cowboys. Personally, I lost interest in about every Cowboys angle after 2008. Romo's a choke artist, they're never properly rated (either so much talk about being overrated that they become underrated or vice versa), they win games that they should win, and they never fail to disappoint in big games. The Cowboys mop up the Rams, and then disappear next week against Philly.<br />
PACKERS VS VIKINGS Remember back in my NFL Preview when I said that the NFL is set against repeat Super Bowl Champions and that a team would have to be way ahead of everyone else to win again? I'm beginning to feel that the Packers are way ahead of everyone else. They're closest competition in the NFC right now (statistically speaking) are the Niners and the Lions. As much as it's fun to watch two likable surprise teams, the reality is they don't hold a candle to the Packers. Their offense is amazing, Aaron Rodgers might be the best QB of the next decade (unless Andrew Luck is as good as advertised), and the Packers might just go undefeated. I don't think they will (too many things need to go right, you can't have any significant injuries, and you have to be pretty lucky along the way) but I wouldn't be surprised if they did. At this point, there's not that much to be said for their opponent, the Vikings. McNabb is washed up and it's time to look towards the future. It's Ponder time in Minnesota, and I don't think he'll forget his first NFL start after the Packers cover the spread twice or thrice over against the Vikes.<br />
SAINTS OVER COLTS If only I were around in Eliminator challenge still (Sigh). What is there to be said for this game? The Colts have been self-destructing for weeks, and there's no point in stopping it now, not with Andrew Luck waiting in the next draft. The Saints win big over the Tanking Indianapolis Colts and regain the lead in the NFC South.<br />
RAVENS OVER JAGUARS This is quite possibly the worst situation that Blaine Gabbert could be thrust in to right now. A decomposing offense playing on a national stage against one of the best defenses in the league that also likes to use lots of confusing formations? That's slaughter. That's the perfect storm of sacks, mistakes, and blank stares on the bench as the ESPN crew shows discouraging stats. I'm looking forward to it. Ravens win big.<br />
Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-47556924179750762082011-10-07T14:16:00.000-07:002011-10-07T14:16:53.811-07:00Welcome to Week 5First off, I would like to give a very big shout-out to everybody reading this column via the scholastic play by play sports broadcasting camp mainpage, where this blog is among the three blogs of the week. I would like to thank the counselors there for supporting me and the blog as well as all the friends that I made there. I wish I would have watched Anchorman enough times to think of a quote to leave here, but I haven't. I'll just have to leave the Anchorman references to Jon Jaffe. Anyways, let's get to the picks.<br />
EAGLES VS BILLS<br />
Blowing a 20 point lead to the 49ers? I didn't know the Eagles suddenly played in Boston (sorry SBC Boston campers. Would it help if I said that Rug Burn Ball seems fun?). The Eagles have way too much talent on both sides of the football for another collapse to happen, but that's what we thought after the first two losses. Other teams have exploited the fatal flaw in the Eagles' defense, they are tremendously soft in between the tackles. We saw a little bit of this on their Week One win, where Steven Jackson busted off a long touchdown run before getting injured. The Eagles rank 30th in the league against the run, surrendering over 120 yards per game. Frank Gore absolutely <em>crushed</em> the Eagles up the middle in the final drive, finishing the day with 127 yards. The Bills blew another lead (through the first four weeks, four leads of 20 or more have been erased. The most times that has happened in an entire season before was four. If there were ever a tombstone for the four-minute drill and fundamental football, the 2011 season would be it) to the Cincinatti Bengals. Up 20-6, the Bills watched the Bengals rally back for a 23-20 win. I can't believe I just typed that sentence. Anyways, I like the Eagles' chances against one of the worst defenses in the league (25 points per game given up so far). The Eagles get back on track with a 30-17 win.<br />
JAGUARS VS BENGALS<br />
Have you ever had something where there was two choices and you would always pick the wrong one? That's kind of where I'm at with Cincy right now. I'm 0-4 picking games that involve the Cincinatti Bengals. At this point, I'm trying to figure out what my gut is telling me so I can go against it. My gut tells me Cincy for this one because Jacksonville is awful and the Bengals finally have some momentum, but I'm going against that advice. The Bengals are a young team that came through with a huge win last week, so you would expect a let-down facing a bad team on the road. Maurice Jones-Drew hasn't been able to get anything going as of late, and he's too good to stay quiet for this long (which is why I'm trying to get him on the cheap in my fantasy league). Expect Jones-Drew to have a big game and Gabbert to notch his first win as a pro as the Jags beat the Bengals.<br />
TITANS VS STEELERS<br />
Yep, I dont believe in the Steelers anymore. I just watched my AFC Super Bowl Pick get burned by Arian Foster (not really that bad until you remember that he was just coming back from a strained hamstring and Gary Kubiak told the media that he hoped to limit Foster to 15 or 20 carries. Eventually, he was willing to risk injury to his star RB just to take advantage of the success he was having). That's especially disturbing because I thought that would be the one problem that the Steelers would never have in my lifetime, a lack of physicallity (I think that's a word). The Steelers were destroyed at the line of scrimmage on both sides of the ball, and that led to big chunks of yardage for the Texans. Then we have the Titans, who are secretly pretty good. They dominated the Ravens earlier this year and Matt Hasselbeck looks like he has a chance to stay relevant for a few more years (anytime a QB starts after 40, we should call him a Favre. Can't you see some studio analyst saying "I like this kid's durability. He's a serious contender to be a Favre in 15 years"? Yep, me too.) after great games against the Browns and the Broncos (I mean, they are the Browns and Broncos, but still). Chris Johnson also looks like a threat to revive his season against a worn-down front seven. For my upset pick of the week, it's the Titans over the Steelers.<br />
CHIEFS VS COLTS<br />
I'm 2-7 this year picking games where both teams have under two wins. I can't even think of a good joke to make about this game. Colts win 27-17. Next.<br />
RAIDERS VS TEXANS<br />
This is a sleeper for Best Game of the Week status. It's also the fantasy clash of the week as Darren McFadden (the number 1 back) squares off against Arian Foster (presumed to be in the top 3 after coming back from a hamstring injury. Hopefully the trend that Foster started of posting injuries on Twitter wont last. I dont need to see groin injuries being posted online). I'm inclined to go with the Texans on this one because they finally look like a fundamentally sound team (making smart passes, generating a good push at the offensive line, everything. I think they're defense collectively generated a few pulses last game) and the Raiders, well, they're the Raiders. Texans win this game on Foster's legs by the score of 31-23. <br />
CARDINALS VS VIKINGS<br />
The Cardinals showed signs of life last week before their defense choked away a big fourth quarter lead against the Giants. One positive that did come out of the defeat was Beanie Wells. I can't stress how much Beanie has sucked over the past few years, but he seemed to start turning things around in the Giants game. Over 120 yards on 27 carries and three TDs is a solid day, and its downright great in comparison to the ineptitude (an SAT/pompous librarian approved word!) he has displayed over the past few years. Meanwhile, nothing seems to go right for the Minnesota Vikings. Squandering both 17 and 20 point leads, and then capping it off by losing to the Chiefs? Ouch. Carinals win 21-17.<br />
SAINTS VS PANTHERS<br />
I wanted to pick Carolina in this game. I really did. After all, I'm a firm believer in the Newton-Smith partnership that has blossomed in the early goings of the season. However, that would be a stupid pick. New Orleans has shown that their offense is a force to be reckoned with, even if their defense isn't on par with the rest of the league. Brees is an early nominee for MVP, and the Saints (along with the Ravens) are the team I can see standing up to the Packers in the playoffs. They have an identity and the talent to live up to it, and that's a commodity in today's NFL. Then again, you might not want to take the Saints if you're betting the spread (big favorites against Cam Newton? Not a good deal. By the way, notice how I've completely jumped on the Cam Newton bandwagon. My NFL Preview says that he has "the chance to be the biggest bust in the past decade". Now? GO CAM NEWTON!!! Although, the fact that he racked up 31(!) fantasy points against me last week had something to do with it). The Panthers have covered in every game so far this year. However, I'm picking the Saints for a 27-23 win.<br />
SEAHAWKS VS GIANTS<br />
The Giants are my Week 5 Eliminator Pick (I hate picking the Giants just as much as everybody else, but there are no other options for this week) by default. I hate having to pick Eliminator Challenge weeks by default and with everybody else (I always try to never go for the game that everybody is picking. There's a reason that 50,000 people don't win Eliminator Challenge), but this one seems like a lock. The Giants win by two scores. If they lose, I'm picking against them out of spite for the rest of the season.<br />
BUCS VS 49ERS<br />
Every week, the media looks for cute angles on the previous week's events (It doesn't just happen after Week 1!). Some of them are legitimate, most of them aren't. One of the angles that I heard was "The Bucs are the second best team in the NFC! This could be their year!" Geez, some people really need to switch to decaf. The Bucs are not the second best NFC Team. Or the third. Or the fourth. Or possibly not even the fifth. They haven't been able to play a complete game or convincingly beat a good opponent. Then again, neither have the Niners. This is a major letdown game for another young team like the Bucs. Coming off a tough Monday Night game, going to the West Coast, and playing a surprisingly frisky 49ers team? Count me in. 23-20 Niners.<br />
CHARGERS VS BRONCOS<br />
There isn't much hope for the Broncos anymore. After getting dismantled by the Packers, the Broncos have to trudge back home to play a traditionally unpredictable Chargers team. One thing, however, is always predictable. Check out the Chargers' previous playoff seasons. 2009 Week 7, Win against the Chiefs 37-7. 2008 Week 14, Win against the Raiders 37-7. 2007 Week 5, Win against the Broncos 41-3. In each Chargers season, they have an absolutely monster game against a terrible division opponent, usually in midseason (this has gone one for 5 or 6 years now). This feels like one of those games. Rivers is overdue for a great game. Chargers win by at least 17 (I already picked the Chargers in Eliminator. Crap).<br />
PATRIOTS VS JETS<br />
The one thing that I never, ever want to do is to pick against my favorite team. I did. The one thing that I would rather jump in to a shark tank than do is to make an Eliminator Challenge pick against my own team. I almost did that too. It's hard to overstate how much the Jets' offensive line sucked last week, but I'll give it a try. Sanchez drops back to pass, having had three sack-strips against him, two returned for touchdowns. There is a regular four man rush for Baltimore and, no joke, two of them CAME FREE. They didn't make a good move past the linemen. They were completely untouched as Sanchez ran away like he was fleeing the mafia as he threw the ball in to the ground. This happened with five offensive linemen. The running game hasn't been good, the offensive line has sucked, and there is absolutely no reason to believe that the Jets will win this game. The Jets' D will keep it close, but I'm wiping away tears as I pick the Pats to win this one.<br />
PACKERS VS FALCONS<br />
Whenever NFL Gameday shows a highlight bit of Eli Manning throwing for a touchdown, Deion Sanders yells "I BELIEVE IN ELI!!!" No, Seriously. I BELIEVE IN ELI!!!! Why is this relevant? This is what I've been yelling at the Falcons since I made them my Super Bowl Pick, only I've been yelling I DONT BELIEVE IN YOU, FALCONS!!!! I dont believe in them now any more than I did before. Bits of Denver Broncos defenders are still stuck to the bottom of Aaron Rodgers' cleat as he tore them apart for 6 TDs. Same bad defense, same great offense, same result. Packers win 37-23.<br />
BEARS VS LIONS<br />
I BELIEVE IN THE LIONS!!!!! It might have taken me two weeks longer than everybody else, but I finally believe in them. Facing a good team on the road, down by over 20 points, the Lions pulled it out again. I'm still shocked. Calvin Johnson is putting up the most dominating performance I've ever seen from a wide receiver in the NFL (Don't forget, I was born after Jerry Rice and Randy Moss' prime). Over the last few seasons, there has been an ongoing debate about this.<em> Well, Andre Johnson looks good. If Randy Moss can get it together, he could be the best. Don't forget about Fitzgerald.</em> Well the debate is over. Calvin Johnson has just settled it with 8 touchdowns in four games (the people who picked Johnson in fantasy football have to be high fiving themselves right now). And dont forget about the Lions' pass rush, now that Nick Fairley is back. Between the Bears' struggling offensive line and Jay Cutler's destructive tendencies (I love it when fans discuss their QBs like a bomb that could explode in a mushroom cloud of interceptions at any moment. Except when it's my QB. Then I hate it), this game has all the makings of a double digit win for the Lions.<br />
Thanks for reading and dont forget to read next time for Week 6 picks. I BELIEVE IN THIS COLUMN!!!Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-42377127457332287292011-09-30T14:51:00.000-07:002011-09-30T14:51:09.333-07:00Week 4 PicksBILLS OVER BENGALS I've given up on the Bengals' chances of being this year's "Bad team that benefits from a good schedule". They have let me down in three straight weeks (by beating Cleveland, and then losing to San Fran and Denver), so the confidence meter in Cincy isnt particularly high right now. Buffalo will have at least one good week against an awful Cincy defense before falling back down to Earth. This time next week, we'll be living in a world in which the Bills are 4-0. I'm preparing for the apocalpyse just in case.<br />
<div>PANTHERS OVER BEARS UPSET PICK!!! I never really liked the Bears this year (which means that I have something in common with everybody else who made predictions about this season). I think that the pass defense isnt good enough to handle Cam Newton. I also think that Jay Cutler is overdue for a "14-33 145 yards 1 touchdown 5 picks 6 eye-rolls 10 times screaming at somebody" game. Always enjoyable.</div><div>TITANS OVER BROWNS This has got to be the week that Chris Johnson finally gets something going, right? Through three games, he's averaging about 2 yards per rush, has not had a run of over 10 yards, and has not rushed for 100 yards for the season. He can't stay terrible for this long. It's impossible. He didn't even appear on the SI or Madden cover.</div><div>COWBOYS OVER LIONS I have picked against the Lions so far (except for their easy game against KC) and I have gotten it wrong. What does this pick prove? That I don't remotely learn from my own mistakes. I expect the Cowboys to pull out a 20-17 win in which the Boys keep moving the chains with Dez Bryant on the slant route and Felix Jones running between the tackles. If the Lions win, I will be officially sold on them for the rest of the season (barring injury of course).</div><div>VIKINGS OVER CHIEFS 0-3 vs 0-3! Welcome to the Toilet Bowl! Or the Something Has Got to Give Bowl. I expect the Vikings to finally win a game. The Vikings can't possibly blow as huge of a lead as they did last week against a Kansas City team that would struggle to beat a good college program. The Vikings should stop impersonating the 2011 Red Sox and hold on to their lead.</div><div>RAMS OVER REDSKINS Because it's time for Rex Grossman to start being Rex Grossman again. By the way, the NFC East just became a wide open race. The Eagles aren't locks anymore, the Giants and Cowboys never fail to fall short of expectations, and the Redskins are, well, you know, the Redskins.</div><div>SAINTS OVER JAGUARS Much like Rick Perry in the debate, the Jags' offense is constantly throwing up all over themselves.</div><div>EAGLES OVER 49ERS It's the return of VINCE!!!!! Also, the Eagles are pissed off and facing a terrible team. This is not going to end well for the 49ers.</div><div>STEELERS OVER TEXANS The Steelers' defense against the Texans' offense. A classic matchup. The Steelers' offense vs the Texans' defense? About as one-sided as a hanging.</div><div>FALCONS OVER SEAHAWKS Last week's pitiful loss in Tampa did nothing to improve how I feel about Atlanta. We're about one terrible loss away from me ditching the Falcons. By the way, I'm still talking about the NFC West. I'm starting to feel sick.</div><div>GIANTS OVER CARDINALS I cant believe that the Giants are looking like the favorites to win the NFC East at this point. If this happens, I'm going to use Neil Everett's Mayne Street answer "Trick question, there is no NFC East." whenever somebody asks me who won the NFC East.</div><div>PACKERS OVER BRONCOS LOCK OF THE WEEK. Should I even waste words on this one? You're right, I shouldn't. Next.<br />
PATS OVER RAIDERS This one is going to be closer than a lot of people think. I wouldnt be at all surprised if the Pats are upset in this one. Tom Brady will still throw for between 450 and 600 yards, but still. McFadden is a monster, but he has to drag the Raiders like every SNL Weekend Update writer has to carry Seth Meyers. Pats win a close one 28-24.<br />
CHARGERS OVER DOLPHINS It was mentioned by a reader in Bill Simmons' column last week that the movie Dolphin Tale was definitely a good sign for Miami on Sunday. After seeing their pathetic performance against the Brown, the Dolphins remind me of the Dolphin in the movie getting a prosthetic tail, only the tail abrubptly falls off and they sink immediately. In a related story, I picked them as a mini-sleeper this year. I tossed that pick out the window about 2 seconds after Week 3 ended. Rivers and the Chargers win easily.<br />
JETS OVER RAVENS Although I try to be objective, I can't hide the fact that I am a HUGE homer. I dont think that I've picked against the Jets in years. Although I think that Baltimore will win, the Jets can pull off an upset here. If the Jets can get back their old identity and ditch the run and gun 300 yards per game throwing approach, they can be real contenders in the AFC. Meanwhile, Baltimore is a volatile Vegas Craps table. Is there a lucky dice thrower that can't lose (See weeks 1 and 3) or one that might as well be holding a black cat (See week two)? You never know what you're going to get (they're much like a box of chocolates in this respect). We finally see the average Ravens and the best Jets (Rex might have triggered an earthquake with his postgame speech after last week. Too bad there's no footage). Jets win 23-20.<br />
BUCS OVER COLTS I can't believe how much Monday Night Football has disappointed in the first few weeks. Instead of Jets-Pats and Saints-Falcons, we get crap like this and Giants-Rams. Good times! The Colts showed signs of life last week, but their first win won't come against Tampa Bay. The Bucs win 26-17.</div><div><br />
</div>Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-2240590649029010662011-09-23T08:57:00.000-07:002011-09-23T08:57:09.070-07:00Some Thoughts About Who's Who in the NFL (Or Slice's cop-out really short column) <br />
We have two weeks in the bag in the 2011 National Football League Season. Now we approach the pivotal Week 3. Weeks 3-5 are like middle school/ beginning of high school for football teams. You start figuring out what your identity is and how you stack up against everybody else. As we head in to these weeks, watch for teams that don't have identities that have winning records. You can't survive in the playoffs winning each game a different way. More on that later. Anyways, it's time to figure out who the upper echelon is, who wont get there this year, and who will never approach it. I'm not doing a picks column this week (if you want my picks, friend me on ESPN.com and you can see my Pigskin Pick Em page. I went 12-4 last week, so I'm not too bad. At least this is what I keep telling myself.) because I want to do a different kind of column this week (Real reason: I have too much work to do a picks column, I want to go see Moneyball/Bucky Larson this weekend, and also I'M LAZY.)<br />
<div> PLAYOFF TEAMS THAT I'M WORRIED ABOUT</div><div>I'm not counting any playoff team that's obviously terrible (Colts and Chiefs) because, uh, you don't need me to tell you that they're terrible. I'm here to try to figure out which teams that could falter that aren't so obvious. Right now, I'm worried about the Jets, the Falcons, the Chargers, and the Saints. The Jets and the Falcons (my favorite team and my Super Bowl pick) can be grouped in to the same category of good teams with no identity. The Jets have the "Ground and Pound" philosophy since Rex Ryan came and have ran it with a great deal of success. However, the offensive line is starting to give out. Nick Mangold is injured for a few games, Wayne Hunter is awful, and we learned in the preseason that Vladimir Ducasse is just as terrible. Shonn Greene is not an elite back, but he can be good behind a competent offensive line. Now, it's not apparent just what the Jets are. Sanchez seems to be improving, giving us the notion that this could be a passing team in a few years. However, the defense and running game look questionable in the early goings (I'm not sold on a great performance against the Black Sheep McCown Brother. Also, I would like to correct last week's column. McCown started Weeks 1 and 2, not Gabbert. Maybe I was just too depressed to think of a McCown brother starting in the NFL). Meanwhile, the Falcons' defense is in infinitely worse shape and the offensive line can't protect Matty Ice. I would be concerned if I were a Falcons fan. Do I regret picking them for the Super Bowl, even though they pulled out a win against the Eagles last week? Um, yes. Yes I do. The Chargers and Saints have identities that simply dont work. The Saints have the "We're not going to bother playing inspired defense, we'll just have to outscore you" identity. That does not work. EVER. The Seahawks beat them last year and revealed the Saints' secondary troubles, now the Saints are showing all of us that they have learned nothing from last year. The Chargers have perhaps the most talented team in football, but the Chargers keep shooting themselves in the foot. The Chargers had seven possessions inside Patriot territory through the halfway point in the third quarter and had only seven points to show for it. The Chargers committed three turnovers and failed to convert a fourth and goal from the one yard line. On a master list of "Types of teams who don't win playoff games", non-fundamentally sound teams are number one and all offense no defense is number 2. Anyways, watch out for these teams to stumble in the upcoming weeks.<br />
7UP<br />
1. New England Patriots and Green Bay Packers: Teams with established quarterbacks and veteran leaders were in the best position to survive the lockout.<br />
2. Darren McFadden's Fantasy Stock: It's through the roof at this point. I expect a great year from McFadden. Imagine what could happen if the Raiders' line were decent.<br />
3. Detroit Lions: I never expected the Lions to be this good. However, I would buy Lions stock cautiously, two of their top players are injury risks. If Stafford and Calvin Johnson stay healthy, this is a dangerous team.<br />
4. Drew Brees: Brees might be on his way to regaining his undisputed "Best in the league" status after two unbelievable games. Too bad New Orleans' defense is made of those crash test dummies.<br />
5. Retro Uniforms: They're still hip!! The Jets' ugly 1950s color scheme unis propelled them to a demolishing of the Jags. I'm convinced that every struggling team should come up with a random alternate uniform to turn their season around. Trust me, it will work.<br />
6. Bucky Larson References: HE'S BORN TO BE A STAR!!!!! RATED R!!!!!!!!<br />
7. The AFC East: Three of the seven 2-0 teams are in the AFC East (Bills, Jets, Pats). The divisional games and level of competition will be as heated as ever between the Jets and the Patriots, and relevant for the first time ever between the Bills and Jets/Pats.<br />
<br />
7DOWN<br />
1. Reviews for Bucky Larson: "A part of my soul died while watching this movie" Haters.<br />
2 Colts and Chiefs: Ouch. This is the first time I've ever seen two playoff teams fall this far. These two teams are not only bad, they are life-alteringly terrible. As in "They have a serious chance of going 0-16" terrible. It's borderline funny at this point, and we're only in Week Two.<br />
3. Guys starting ahead of 2011 Rookie QBs: Blaine Gabbert is getting thrown in to the fire after the Black Sheep McCown brother predictably sucked. Matt Hasselbeck is proving that he isn't completely over the hill, and Donovan McNabb is still in his football Mid-Life Crisis. Not a great time for these guys.<br />
4. NFL Sunday Ticket: 300 dollars per year? Really? I can get myself a nice new iPod for that. Or a really crappy car. Or keep it and say that I have about as much money as Bucky Larson made in three weeks (two more Larson references to go before I break the record). Anyways, I'll save my money and settle for a few games per week.<br />
5.The Brady Rule: I can understand wanting to protect the quarterback's legs, but this has gotten ridiculous. A 15 yard penalty after Raheem Brock was pushed in to Ben Roethlisberger's legs? Really? Soon we'll have defensive players having to ask for permission before they can sack the QB.<br />
6: Jamaal Charles: At least he can look at the framed photos/ Youtube videos of last season. I was kinda sad to see him go. Until next year, Jamaal.<br />
7. Too much Homework: It sucks. Sadly, you'll probably be seeing more of these really quick articles because of the too much HW actor during the week. I will try to put in a longer piece time permitting, but it looks like I'll have to keep these shorter for the foreseeable future. Oh, and one more thing. Wait for it....... Wait for it....... BUCKY LARSON BORN TO BE A STAR RATED R!!!!!!!!!!<br />
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</div>Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-28276783737320185832011-09-16T19:03:00.000-07:002011-09-19T17:56:47.333-07:00Week Two NFL Picks<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
If Week One was any indication, we're in for a wild NFL season. Cam Newton took the league by storm, throwing for over 400 yards (albeit against a decrepit Cardinals defense) and looking like he has the chance to be an elite QB in a few years. The Dolphins and the Patriots engaged in an epic "How many times can we blow a coverage in a single game?" contest, leading to both quarterbacks throwing for over 400 yards, including a franchise record 512 yards for Brady. As a long suffering Jets fan, I can personally attest to the fact that Tom Brady never stops finding ways to punch you in the gut. Even when he isn't playing you. More depressing still, my two Super Bowl picks (the Atlanta Falcons and the Pittsburgh Steelers) lost by a combined score of 65-19. If you're like me and your picks did terribly (or well) just keep repeating the following. DONT FREAK OUT, IT'S STILL WEEK ONE!!!! You've got to go with your gut as far as picks go at least until after Week 3. Two cardinal rules of picking football games are to never panic over a team doing poorly unless there is solid reason to believe that it will happen again (Example: There is reason to believe that the Colts will do just as pitifully again because they don't have Manning. There is absolutely no way that the Steelers are going to turn the ball over seven times again or get blown out by 28 points.). On the flip side, you always want to be a little on edge when your picks are doing too well. Too many teams hit their ceiling way too early in the year, and then fizzle down the stretch. Your job during the first three weeks of the season is to stick with your gut and to figure out which teams are headed downhill and make sure to stop picking them the moment they don't look as fantastic as they did in the first few weeks. So, without further ado, here are the picks for Week Two of the NFL Season.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-BNyy44FRfo0/Tmqd9MgTumI/AAAAAAAAAIA/lpelSS6p8Sc/s1600/Buffalo+Bills.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-BNyy44FRfo0/Tmqd9MgTumI/AAAAAAAAAIA/lpelSS6p8Sc/s1600/Buffalo+Bills.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-9ksTU2WOmZo/Tmqd8OxPUjI/AAAAAAAAAHU/Ud890W96xvI/s1600/Oakland+Raiders.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-9ksTU2WOmZo/Tmqd8OxPUjI/AAAAAAAAAHU/Ud890W96xvI/s1600/Oakland+Raiders.png" /></a></div>
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<b><u>BUFFALO BILLS VS OAKLAND RAIDERS</u></b></div>
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The Bills are a team that I would put on my "peaking too soon" list. The Bills dismantled the AFC West Champs last week, but nobody believes that they're as good as they played that day. Still, I see the Bills beating the Raiders this week. Ryan Fitzpatrick looks dialed in right now, having thrown for four touchdowns against the Chiefs. The Raiders gutted out a tough win last week, but it was against a mess of a Denver team. I wouldnt be surprised if the Raiders pulled another one out, but I expect the Bills to go to 2-0. By the way, I saw some camera shots of the few Bills fans that were in Arrowhead Stadium last week. They were just standing with their mouths wide open and this look of disbelief in their eyes. <em>The Bills have thoroughly stunk for so long that their fans actually can't believe something good happened to them.</em> At least for now, the Bills look like a mini-sleeper at the very least. Ryan Fitzpatrick decimates the Raiders for three touchdowns. Bills' fans should take a picture of their 2-0 record, because it wont last very long with New England, Philly, and the Giants all in the next few weeks.<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8E45emhCpwY/Tmqd6lCtSlI/AAAAAAAAAGM/tCV_7cM6foA/s1600/Chicago+Bears.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-8E45emhCpwY/Tmqd6lCtSlI/AAAAAAAAAGM/tCV_7cM6foA/s1600/Chicago+Bears.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ddw3H0gzFeI/Tmqd7yq4YXI/AAAAAAAAAHE/sefg49GAgW4/s1600/New+Orleans+Saints.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ddw3H0gzFeI/Tmqd7yq4YXI/AAAAAAAAAHE/sefg49GAgW4/s1600/New+Orleans+Saints.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>CHICAGO BEARS VS NEW ORLEANS SAINTS</b></u></div>
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I'm going with the Saints in this one because they absolutely could have beaten the Packers with a few breaks here and there (most notably making a concerted effort to tackle Randall Cobb during his 108 yard kickoff return). The Bears had everything go perfectly for them in a 30-12 dismantling of the Falcons. The Saints' secondary got shredded by Aaron Rodgers, and I don't expect a much different result when they go up against Jay Cutler. However, the Bears' secondary really wasn't excellent during the game. If the pass rush didn't get to Matt Ryan and force him to make mistakes, he could have made some plays. White was open a few times, Tony Gonzalez got seperation, there were a lot of things he could have done. The Saints' offensive line is much better than the Falcons, and I would go as far as to say that right guard Jahri Evans is the best in the game (only allowed two sacks through 16 games last year). Drew Brees will dissect the Bears' secondary while Mark Ingram gets more carries and gradually becomes more and more involved as he learns the playbook. The Bears will keep the game close, but lose on a killer last minute interception from Cutler. I'm going with the Saints in a 34-30 shootout.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uIXJepR6mgQ/Tmqd7VCDGXI/AAAAAAAAAGs/-WPZwKRUcZ0/s1600/Indianapolis+Colts.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uIXJepR6mgQ/Tmqd7VCDGXI/AAAAAAAAAGs/-WPZwKRUcZ0/s1600/Indianapolis+Colts.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Jkklbzhe_tI/Tmqd6yHqyyI/AAAAAAAAAGU/Ebo1savNnuY/s1600/Cleveland+Browns.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Jkklbzhe_tI/Tmqd6yHqyyI/AAAAAAAAAGU/Ebo1savNnuY/s1600/Cleveland+Browns.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>INDIANAPOLIS COLTS VERSUS CLEVELAND BROWNS</b></u></div>
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It's shocking how far the Colts have fallen since 2009.<em> 2009 Colts fan: I can't believe that Jim Caldwell took the starters out, we could have gone undefeated! 2011 Colts Fan: I cant believe we allowed that big punt return, we would have only been down 20 at halftime to the Texans if that didn't happen!</em> As an interesting side note, the over/under is 10.5 on the number of eye blinks for Jim Caldwell all game. The guy might be statue or perhaps a cadaver that's been propped up. I'm not even sure if he has a pulse. One thing that I am sure about is that the Colts won't lose this game. Once you start losing to a team from Cleveland, then it might be time to put your current roster in the paper shredder and start over. I can't picture the Colts losing at home to the Browns. Cleveland accumulated over 100 penalty yards (In a related story, I've never watched a game in which a team that had over 100 penalty yards won.) and made several stupid mistakes on defense (I keep picturing somebody from Cleveland trying to call the play in the huddle, and then watching AJ Green run in to the endzone from the corner of their eye, and then scratching his head wondering what happened. Pat Shurmur, my friend, you have your work cut out for you) in a 27-17 loss to the Bengals. No,really. A team lost to the Bengals. That wasn't a typo. No matter how depressing the brief Kerry Collins era is, I just can't see Indy, with all the veteran leadership on that team, losing to Cleveland. The Colts pull it out in a 24-14 win.<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-sNj2YO055NY/Tmqd7k8f4_I/AAAAAAAAAGw/_nKvSyuH0X8/s1600/Kansas+City+Chiefs.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-sNj2YO055NY/Tmqd7k8f4_I/AAAAAAAAAGw/_nKvSyuH0X8/s1600/Kansas+City+Chiefs.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xBtDABSHruQ/Tmqd7BuLJwI/AAAAAAAAAGg/XQM9D4Z5vJY/s1600/Detriot+Lions.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xBtDABSHruQ/Tmqd7BuLJwI/AAAAAAAAAGg/XQM9D4Z5vJY/s1600/Detriot+Lions.png" /></a></div>
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<b><u>KANSAS CITY CHIEFS VS DETROIT LIONS</u></b></div>
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And the Chiefs are decomposing already. I would have at least thought that the Chiefs would flirt with .500 for about half the season before their downward spiral, but it looks like Kansas City is wasting no time kicking off the trend. Detroit, in stark contrast, is on a big upward trend. The Lions survived against Tampa Bay in a 27-20 thriller in the most underrated game of Week One (Big plays, lead changes, nearly a last second comeback by Tampa Bay, it was a good game). The Lions laid out for everybody to see just how much of a liability Tampa Bay's secondary was. Nobody in that whole defense had the size or the athleticism to match up with Calvin Johnson, so he looked like the token dominant tall guy in a high school pickup basketball game. Why am I telling you this? Because Kansas City is worse. Not even a little worse. Much worse. Eric Berry is gone for the season, which puts a defense that already experienced what it's like to be in way over your head in an even more overmatched position. The only hope the Chiefs have of beating opponents is to outscore them. I don't know if you've noticed, but I can't remember the last time an all-offense, no-defense team even approached the Super Bowl. You're not gonna believe this, but I don't think it's a coincidence. The Lions win 31-20.<br />
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<img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-b_lb1J6iZHI/Tmqd7fYHSvI/AAAAAAAAAGo/LU1fsIlv0Uw/s1600/Green+Bay+Packers.png" /><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><img src="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-ItHXhvNE9Vs/Tmqd6nL4WPI/AAAAAAAAAGI/LuYq6hhDgjc/Carolina%252520Panthers.png" /></div>
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<b><u>GREEN BAY PACKERS VS CAROLINA PANTHERS</u></b></div>
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The principle of not overreacting to teams also applies to players. Cam Newton had a great first game, but will it carry over to a much tougher Packers' team? Sure, there's reason to be excited about Newton, but expect a much more limited role this week. The Packers' defense got shredded by Drew Brees last week, but I don't expect that will happen again with a rookie quarterback and only one or two big play options for Newton to throw to. Although this Carolina team will be exciting to watch throughout the season, I say that Aaron Rodgers and the Packers score almost at will in this game. A rookie keeping up with Aaron Rodgers in a shootout against a much better defense than anything he's ever seen? Not in this lifetime. Packers 42, Panthers 20.<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-a-95SrRecRY/Tmqd9JaCRnI/AAAAAAAAAH8/doaNpQk-Zko/s1600/Baltimore+Ravens.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-a-95SrRecRY/Tmqd9JaCRnI/AAAAAAAAAH8/doaNpQk-Zko/s1600/Baltimore+Ravens.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-MVj3k-S-nNA/Tmqd878QtXI/AAAAAAAAAHw/r-3jHf5qHWE/s1600/Tennessee+Titans.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-MVj3k-S-nNA/Tmqd878QtXI/AAAAAAAAAHw/r-3jHf5qHWE/s1600/Tennessee+Titans.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>BALTIMORE RAVENS VS TENNESSEE TITANS</b></u></div>
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Before I make this pick, I need to adress something about the Ravens' performance last week. I kept hearing talk all week about how "the Ravens finally know how to win" and even "they're my Super Bowl pick right now by a mile". Let's all take a deep breath and agree that the Ravens are nowhere near as great as Pittsburgh made them look last week. Come on. Deep Breath. Inhale. Exhale. Good, we're on the same page. That being said, Baltimore is a very good football team that may or may not have taken a leap in Week one, but I'm afraid that's all that can be said about them at this point because, again, IT"S WEEK ONE!!!!!!!!! However, I expect the Ravens to run roughshod over the Tennessee Titans. The Titans have an underrated defense, but there's really nothing there that I can't see the Ravens handling. Ray Rice looks better than ever, Joe Flacco made sharp throws and great reads all game, and Anquan Boldin's route running is just amazing to watch. The only way I can see the Titans getting close in this one is if Chris Johnson has several of his long overdue "By the time you see me I'll be a good 10 yards past you" runs where he just hits a gap in the O-Line and apparently turns in to a human Ferrari for the rest of the run. Even if he has three of those (see the highlights from Week 2 of the 2009 Season Titans vs Texans if you want to see an example of what I mean), I still dont think it will be enough for a Titans' offense (led by an anywhere from 70 to 90 percent washed up Matt Hasselbeck) to carry the Titans by the Ravens. Ravens 31 Titans 10<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ApZ3Mp_Hi38/Tmqd8rHnp5I/AAAAAAAAAHs/919FfEIQR4o/s1600/Tampa+Bay+Buccaneers.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ApZ3Mp_Hi38/Tmqd8rHnp5I/AAAAAAAAAHs/919FfEIQR4o/s1600/Tampa+Bay+Buccaneers.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-D76iQlF1AM4/Tmqd7_tL2eI/AAAAAAAAAG8/ll-tV955TTw/s1600/Minnesota+Vikings.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-D76iQlF1AM4/Tmqd7_tL2eI/AAAAAAAAAG8/ll-tV955TTw/s1600/Minnesota+Vikings.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>TAMPA BAY BUCS VS MINNESOTA VIKINGS</b></u></div>
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Both teams looked awful on opposing sides of the football. The Bucs' secondary gave up big gains and generated no push at the line of scrimmage all day. We've already covered their inadequacies. But what about Minnesota? We all know that Adrian Peterson is pretty much a sure thing every week, but where is the passing game? Donovan McNabb passed for, no joke, 37 yards all game. I don't play football, but I'm occasionally the QB for short pass plays in gym class. I threw it a little bit ahead of the fastest kid in the class on a 5 yard drag route, and he took it in from 50 yards out for the touchdown. In that game, I just passed for more yards in one play than McNabb did for the whole game. Kind of scary, isn't it? My question here is this. You have a great O-Line and quite possibly the best RB alive, WHY DON'T YOU USE HIM??? Throw more screens! Run checkdown plays for him! Any of those options beats McNabb (By the way, you know what McNabb is like at this point? A person in a mid-life crisis. He's having the football equivalent of a mid-life crisis. Instead of accepting his limitations and sticking to what he's good at, you could tell that he was just dying to try and scramble and throw deep passes like he was 23 again. All he needs to do is purchase a motorcycle or a convertible to complete the effect). Meanwhile, the Bucs need to get back to a balanced offense that pounds the ball with LaGarrette Blount and chews up clock to keep the defense off the field. I say that Tampa Bay rights the ship (I would like to accept the 2011 Worst Pun of the Year with that joke) with a 20-17 victory.<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Ih6_BeMkx4k/Tmqd7rYlrJI/AAAAAAAAAG0/MEUCldkIOYM/s1600/Jacksonville+Jaguars.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Ih6_BeMkx4k/Tmqd7rYlrJI/AAAAAAAAAG0/MEUCldkIOYM/s1600/Jacksonville+Jaguars.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FKy8VDzwKp0/Tmqd8MmI1QI/AAAAAAAAAHM/CQZKBvru9mU/s1600/New+York+Jets.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FKy8VDzwKp0/Tmqd8MmI1QI/AAAAAAAAAHM/CQZKBvru9mU/s1600/New+York+Jets.png" /></a></div>
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<b><u>JACKSONVILLE JAGS VS NEW YORK JETS</u></b></div>
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The Jets dodged a huge bullet at home against Dallas last week. I honestly dont know how to feel about that win. On the one hand, Sanchez took a big step forward and looked like he was developing in to the franchise quarterback that we thought he'd be. On the other hand, the Jets abandoned their Running and Defense Wins philosophy that led them to so much playoff success over the years. The Jets made the big plays that I never see them make, but they had to get a little lucky to put themselves in the positions to make those plays. Ultimately, I dont know what to expect from the Jets this week. Fortunately, I have a pretty good idea as to what I should expect from the Jags this week after they grinded out an ugly win over the Tennessee Titans. Quarterback Blaine Gabbert will have to face what might be the most complicated defense in the league after relying heavily on the running game in a close home win over one of the most unstable teams in the league. How do I think this game is gonna end up? Take a wild guess. Jets by at least 10.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-wZ0Dcx-jcOI/Tmqd9FsIoSI/AAAAAAAAAIE/AfcQwp7GXFQ/s1600/Arizona+Cardinals.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-wZ0Dcx-jcOI/Tmqd9FsIoSI/AAAAAAAAAIE/AfcQwp7GXFQ/s1600/Arizona+Cardinals.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zRjGfsn71lY/Tmqd8zLDzbI/AAAAAAAAAH0/0xfmWpP-S8A/s1600/Washington+Redskins.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zRjGfsn71lY/Tmqd8zLDzbI/AAAAAAAAAH0/0xfmWpP-S8A/s1600/Washington+Redskins.png" /></a></div>
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<b><u>ARIZONA CARDINALS VS WASHINGTON REDSKIINS</u></b></div>
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Along with all the chatter about how good the Ravens are and how much of a choke artist Tony Romo is (Noooooooo really?! I never noticed.) I heard some snippets about the Redskins. You've gotta love the token overreaction to Week One and you really can't blame columnists for looking for a juicy angle. but really? "Surprise team of the year." "A dark horse in the NFC." "It sure is a football team!!" OK, I made that last one up. Still, they're a bit overblown. Have people considered that the Giants could just be a bad team? Whatever people predict, I see a relapse for the Redskins at home against Arizona. Kevin Kolb is just the kind of passer that can pick apart a weak secondary like Washington's. That's not to say that the Redskins won't keep it close, but I see Kevin Kolb throwing for at least three hundred yards in a 30-27 win for Zona. Sorry for the lack of substance about the actual game, but I can't find anything interesting to say about this one. I'm sorry guys. Just know that I try.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zCWwymH-u9w/Tmqd8pjHYyI/AAAAAAAAAHk/UzgWi6l-lsE/s1600/Seattle+Seahawks.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zCWwymH-u9w/Tmqd8pjHYyI/AAAAAAAAAHk/UzgWi6l-lsE/s1600/Seattle+Seahawks.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VeezZ6pIzFM/Tmqd8NwTLzI/AAAAAAAAAHY/S7xl7YIhUh0/s1600/Pittsburgh+Steelers.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VeezZ6pIzFM/Tmqd8NwTLzI/AAAAAAAAAHY/S7xl7YIhUh0/s1600/Pittsburgh+Steelers.png" /></a></div>
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<b><u>SEATTLE SEAHAWKS VS PITTSBURGH STEELERS</u></b></div>
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Welcome to my Lock of the Week! The Seahawks let up two huge returns to Ted Ginn Jr last week in the span of less than a minute, turned the ball over three times, and just barely got over 200 yards of total offense (200 yards of total offense is football's Mendoza Line. One or two games beneath it is OK, but you've got a problem if you regularly have games where you get less than 200 yards). Meanwhile, the Steelers are absolutely ticked off about their embarassing loss to Baltimore. Taken as a whole, this game is like waving a steak in front of an angry lion. You can guess which team is the steak. Steelers 35, Seahawks 17<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4Zw7qSwyzs8/Tmqd6wo82dI/AAAAAAAAAGY/yZxAl-67Z4Q/s1600/Dallas+Cowboys.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4Zw7qSwyzs8/Tmqd6wo82dI/AAAAAAAAAGY/yZxAl-67Z4Q/s1600/Dallas+Cowboys.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XXBYI81fpos/Tmqd8fCopDI/AAAAAAAAAHc/d26pvZpu89U/s1600/San+Francisco+49ers.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XXBYI81fpos/Tmqd8fCopDI/AAAAAAAAAHc/d26pvZpu89U/s1600/San+Francisco+49ers.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>DALLAS COWBOYS VS SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS</b></u></div>
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And Tony Romo does it again! If he isn't already considered the Karl Malone of football, he's getting very close (I've always wondered if Romo just stops after three quarters in other things. Does he not play the fourth quarter in Madden? Does he complete three-fourths of his grocery shopping, then just walk out? We need a TV show where athletes are forced to live up to their sports reputation in everyday life.). Romo starts off the game very well, and then something changes. He starts getting that "It's just not in me" look in his eye and starts throwing passes that have no arc and fly off three feet away from his target. Other than that, Romo's just about the best clutch QB I've ever seen. However, the Cowboys should be able to dominate a hapless 49ers team that got two touchdowns off of Ted Ginn's returns. The Cowboys are almost a complete team. Besides the secondary (awful) and the O-Line (will get better as the season goes along), the Cowboys have just about everything you would want on a football team. However, the 49ers have become a popular upset pick (Popular upset picks never win. If they did, we would all be studio analysts. See where I'm going with this one?) due to the fact that the Cowboys choked away that game last week. People are forgetting things like "Isn't Alex Smith terrible?" and "Don't they play in the NFC West, where my high school's intramural flag football team would look decent" and most importantly, again, "Isn't Alex Smith terrible?" This one won't even be close. Cowboys win 30-14.<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-wYjj2eOJdKY/Tmqd66_Be_I/AAAAAAAAAGQ/qmicO6sIWdc/s1600/Cincinnati+Bengals.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-wYjj2eOJdKY/Tmqd66_Be_I/AAAAAAAAAGQ/qmicO6sIWdc/s1600/Cincinnati+Bengals.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-L0Gum4LEdG0/Tmqd7NuhrhI/AAAAAAAAAGc/OC_O9P7Mz98/s1600/Denver+Broncos.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-L0Gum4LEdG0/Tmqd7NuhrhI/AAAAAAAAAGc/OC_O9P7Mz98/s1600/Denver+Broncos.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>BENGALS VS BRONCOS</b></u></div>
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Uh-oh. Could we have a (gasp followed by shocked face)<em> sleeper in Cincy?</em> Their next few games (they only face one team with a wining record last year, and that team is Indy) are pretty much the biggest gift a football team can receive. All that's missing is the big red bow on top. If the Bengals play reasonably well and come up with some big plays, it's not entirely unfeasible that the Bengals could be 4-2 or 5-1 in their next six games. Far-fetched, but definitely possible. Meanwhile, the Broncos had a lackluster game against the Raiders last week, losing 23-20. The defense allowed 150 rushing yards to Darren McFadden, not a huge deal until you realize that a Honda Civic might not be able to make it 5 yards behind that mess of an offensive line. On another note, I would say that judging from the boos raining down on Kyle Orton throughout the game on Monday, we can write the Broncos off as another team that does not have home field advantage this season. The Bengals win 23-20 as Cedric Benson runs for over 150 yards.<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-dyq6YgmqXTo/Tmqd7rCNF7I/AAAAAAAAAG4/et10uWwPdi0/s1600/Miami+Dolphins.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-dyq6YgmqXTo/Tmqd7rCNF7I/AAAAAAAAAG4/et10uWwPdi0/s1600/Miami+Dolphins.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-bcPtNrctsVk/Tmqd7azS3lI/AAAAAAAAAGk/26TCJSCAt_c/s1600/Houston+Texans.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-bcPtNrctsVk/Tmqd7azS3lI/AAAAAAAAAGk/26TCJSCAt_c/s1600/Houston+Texans.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>MIAMI DOLPHINS VS HOUSTON TEXANS</b></u></div>
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Let's agree, just like we did for the Ravens, that the Texans are definitely not as good as the Colts made them look last week. And that the Dolphins are not as bad as the Patriots made them look last week. To be honest, I didn't expect the Dolphins to keep the game that close. I was expecting the inevitable 34-7 blowout that just happens whenever the Pats want to make a statement. Still, I'm not quite sure that the Dolphins' best will be able to beat the Texans. Miami's one fatal flaw, the atrocious secondary, will be exposed yet again as Schaub throws for over 400 yards. Arian Foster will go for 75 yards and a touchdown on 15 carries in his first game back. I'm calling this one a Texans' win by the score of 31-20.<br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-VkC2RxVx2v8/Tmqd8dJecPI/AAAAAAAAAHg/siKiGGDn_9Q/s1600/San+Diego+Chargers.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-VkC2RxVx2v8/Tmqd8dJecPI/AAAAAAAAAHg/siKiGGDn_9Q/s1600/San+Diego+Chargers.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-jgld5Y58DfI/Tmqd74-7y9I/AAAAAAAAAHA/bo6f24r7Yzk/s1600/New+England+Patriots.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-jgld5Y58DfI/Tmqd74-7y9I/AAAAAAAAAHA/bo6f24r7Yzk/s1600/New+England+Patriots.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>SAN DIEGO CHARGERS VS NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS</b></u></div>
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It seems like everything that can go wrong for the Chargers ends up going wrong. I'm not sure how often kickers get injured when they're untouched by the other team on the play, but it's gotta be something like once a year. The Chargers almost lost to a clearly inferior team at home because they're kicker was out and they had to go for it on 4th down in field goal range several times because Nate Kaeding wasn't there. I'm convinced that this kind of thing only happens to the Chargers. Meanwhile, nothing of the sort ever happens to New England (I just slammed my head on my desk repeatedly), who dismantled Miami on Monday Night. The Chargers definitely wont let Brady have the same degree of success that he had against Miami, but I really cant think of another football team that would let that happen. The utter smackdown that Brady layed on the Miami Dolphins' defense was borderline cruel and unusual. In a semi-related story, Tom Brady's Male Uggs commercial was also cruel and unusual, but that's a different topic. I wouldn't be surprised if the Chargers pulled it out, as the Patriots showed that their defense might have gotten worse since last season (how is this even possible?). However, I say that the Chargers fall a turnover short in this one as the Pats win 28-23.<br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-gxIKCgyI_QY/Tmqd7_XoJ9I/AAAAAAAAAHI/SoeID7sv46g/s1600/New+York+Giants.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-gxIKCgyI_QY/Tmqd7_XoJ9I/AAAAAAAAAHI/SoeID7sv46g/s1600/New+York+Giants.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SJZWDn76pQc/Tmqd8ps7E7I/AAAAAAAAAHo/UQYY-fjMYH8/s1600/St.+Louis+Rams.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SJZWDn76pQc/Tmqd8ps7E7I/AAAAAAAAAHo/UQYY-fjMYH8/s1600/St.+Louis+Rams.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>NEW YORK GIANTS VS ST LOUIS RAMS</b></u></div>
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Ouch. I'm not quite sure I expected the Giants to lay this big of a goose egg on Opening Day, not against the Redskins anyways. But they did. When your defense makes Rex Grossman (REX GROSSMAN!!!) look good, then it might be time to re-evaluate things. Just a suggestion. By the way, the Rams played the Eagles a lot tougher than most people give them credit for. The score was close until the fourth quarter, when the Eagles started to pull away. Really, can you blame the Rams for getting half their starting defense injured? Can you blame Sam Bradford when his receivers seemingly let passes sail right through their hands like they were made of glass or something? No, you can't. The Rams are another team that's much better than the box score would show. Sadly, I'm beginning to suspect that the Giants are not. An already beaten up secondary will get picked on some more on Monday Night as the Rams beat the Giants 17-7.<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3kk08wyMjJs/Tmqd8E0xQ8I/AAAAAAAAAHQ/WIlqWTkL0oY/s1600/Philadelphia+Eagles.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3kk08wyMjJs/Tmqd8E0xQ8I/AAAAAAAAAHQ/WIlqWTkL0oY/s1600/Philadelphia+Eagles.png" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">VS.</span><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-bp4OqUPqJFo/Tmqd84Bh-uI/AAAAAAAAAH4/TjcyRGiLb-k/s1600/Atlanta+Falcons.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-bp4OqUPqJFo/Tmqd84Bh-uI/AAAAAAAAAH4/TjcyRGiLb-k/s1600/Atlanta+Falcons.png" /></a></div>
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<u><b>GAME OF THE WEEK: PHILADELPHIA EAGLES VS ATLANTA FALCONS</b></u></div>
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And we're finally at the game of the week. About time. And here is my controversial pick of the week (It could be interperated as gutsy, moronic, depserately trying to support my Super Bowl Pick even though I don't totally believe in them any more, or none of the above. Whatever controversial means to you.). The Falcons upset the Eagles in a 38-35 shootout. Since you're taking the time to read this, I feel obligated to back that statement up. The Falcons have tremendous depth at not only receiver, but overall passing options. Lockdown corners such as Nnamdi Asomugha work best when they can focus in on one receiver and dont have to switch around every play. The Falcons force you to switch around every play because of their depth at the receiver position. Plus, I don't see any linebacker on the Eagles that is athletic enough to match up with Tony Gonzalez, meaning that he'll probably haul in at least 6 passes. The Eagles were gashed up the middle by Cadillac Williams last week, so what do you think Michael Turner will do to them? Not to mention the fact that this could be the week where the Eagles' questionable offensive line catches up with Michael Vick. We all know it's only a matter of time before it happens, and the Falcons' defense is in that "This is NOT happening again" mindset that defenses usually get in after bad games. I expect this game to be almost a doppelganger of the Saints-Packers game last week. Two good teams, questionable defenses, amazing offenses, great QB's, no shortage of receiving talent, it's all there. In the end, expect a Falcons win as Matty Ice scores one touchdown too many for Vick and the Eagles.<br />
That is the end of my Week Two picks. So long, enjoy Week 2, and see you next time for week 3 picks.<br />
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Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-7539478271036201832011-09-07T11:58:00.000-07:002011-09-09T16:50:26.487-07:00NFL Preview Part IV<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b><u>SUPER BOWL CONTENDERS: 6-1</u></b></div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FKy8VDzwKp0/Tmqd8MmI1QI/AAAAAAAAAHM/CQZKBvru9mU/s1600/New+York+Jets.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FKy8VDzwKp0/Tmqd8MmI1QI/AAAAAAAAAHM/CQZKBvru9mU/s1600/New+York+Jets.png" /></a></div>
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<u>6. New York Jets</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: Mark Sanchez finally has a breakout year and leads the Jets to a first-round bye. The new veteran additions at wide receiver serve as suitable replacements for Cotchery and Edwards (especially Burress, who pulls the wide receiver equivalent of what Michael Vick did last year of quarterback). The new rookies on the O-Line integrate seamlessly with the veterans. The defense is a force to be reckoned with, and Muhammad Wilkerson contributes double digit sack numbers. Darelle Revis and Antonio Cromartie maintain their position as one of the best corner combinations in the league (especially Revis, who at times looks dangerously close to "The other team's best receiver might as well not show up today" levels. ) The Jets finish at 13-3, and win the Super Bowl.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario: Mark Sanchez regresses in his third year (equivalent to dropping dead from a "being a franchise QB" standpoint.), forcing an overrated running game to carry the team behind an offensive line that struggles as the rookies take a full year to learn all of the different protection schemes. The Jets' 3-4 scheme can't live up to its full potential with Sione Pouha starting at nose tackle, and the Jets' defense takes a fall from grace not unlike what we saw with the Ravens defense. A strong schedule doesn't help matters at all. The Jets finish 8-8 and watch the Pats win the Super Bowl.</li>
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<li>Most Likely Scenario: Sanchez continues to develop in his third year, but doesn't break out until year 4. We find out if Sanchez is a game manager, or a game winner. Shonn Greene bounces back from his sophomore slump to run for 1,000 yards. The offensive line isnt as good as it was in past years, with veteran Damien Woody gone. Holmes and Burress form a fearsome tandem of WRs (my candidates for starters on the all-felony team) and create severe matchup problems for opponents. The defense stays in the top 5, getting no better nor worse than last year. The Jets finish the season at 11-5, grab the 5 seed in the AFC East, and go to at least the divisional round of the playoffs. In the words of Bart Scott, CANT WAIT!!!!!! Also, Bart Scott definitely joins Rasheed Wallace and others in the "I wouldn't want to be around him when he's pissed" Hall of Fame. By the way, I love how Bart Scott called out everybody who picked the Pats from ESPN after the game. I vote that every time there's a big upset, one guy from the team gets to call out 5 people that picked against them and insult them. It can't miss.</li>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-b_lb1J6iZHI/Tmqd7fYHSvI/AAAAAAAAAGo/LU1fsIlv0Uw/s1600/Green+Bay+Packers.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-b_lb1J6iZHI/Tmqd7fYHSvI/AAAAAAAAAGo/LU1fsIlv0Uw/s1600/Green+Bay+Packers.png" /></a></div>
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<u>5. Green Bay Packers</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: See: 2010 NFL Season. The best case scenario for the Packers is that everything that happened last year happens again, except that the Packers get a first round bye this year and can play their playoff games at home.</li>
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<li>Worst Case and Most Likely Scenario: Super Bowl Hangover alert!! We've seen this time and again with the Steelers in 09, the Saints in 2010, the Giants in 08, the list goes on and on. One might not think "They've got a big target on their back" is reason enough to not win the Super Bowl again, but it is. When you make a Super Bowl pick, you also have to consider history. Last year was the first Super Bowl in a long time where two popular preseason Super Bowl favorites met. Most other years, it's been either one or zero preseason favorites. Super Bowl Winners that don't get better the next season or aren't significantly ahead of the rest of the league dont repeat as champs. The only ones to do it in the last decade were the Pats. They had a 21 game winning streak, so they were definitely ahead of the rest of the league by a large margin. The Packers dont give me that impression. I'm penciling them in for a division title and the number 2 seed. Worst Case Scenario is a divisional round loss to the three seeded Atlanta in a Playoff Revenge game.</li>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3kk08wyMjJs/Tmqd8E0xQ8I/AAAAAAAAAHQ/WIlqWTkL0oY/s1600/Philadelphia+Eagles.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-3kk08wyMjJs/Tmqd8E0xQ8I/AAAAAAAAAHQ/WIlqWTkL0oY/s1600/Philadelphia+Eagles.png" /></a></div>
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<u>4. Philadelphia Eagles</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: Super Bowl Winners. Eagles fans expect nothing less after one of the greatest offseasons by any team in NFL History. Michael Vick continues his amazing comeback by sustaining the level of play we saw from him in 2010. With LeSean McCoy in the backfield and weapons like DeSean Jackson, Jeremy Maclin, Steve Smith, and Brent Celek, the Eagles offense takes the number one spot. Defensively, Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie and Nnamdi Asomugha give the Eagles the top shutdown corner in the league and one of the top 5 playmaking corners in the league. Asante Samuel's conversion to the safety position goes off without a hitch. uddenly, the Eagles have no real weaknesses on defense. Andy Reid turns in to football's version of Casey Stengel, substituting players in different defensive packages masterfully. The Eagles shake their terrible (and that's an understatement) history to finally win a Super Bowl.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario: Michael Vick gets injured for the year after constantly having to scramble away from the rush coming from his left side. While this might seem a bit extreme, it might happen. The Eagles' O-Line (especially the left side) wet the bed in pre-season against base formations. There's no reason to expect them to get better in the regular season. Also, the Eagles could be victims of both the Heat Theory (everybody believed in us a little bit too much) and the disease of more (everybody on the offensive side of the ball wants to be number 1 and starts in-fighting. Not unlike what happened in Cincy to implode the Ocho-Housh tandem. That, and the fact that they were more washed up than Brett Favre was last year at the time. I think that bears mentioning.) Defensively, the Eagles need a defensive tackle or a linebacker to overperform, otherwise their front seven (besides the defensive end positions) isnt scaring anybody. Asante Samuel wants to go back to playing corner after he decides that he does not like safety. He starts to complain about it (This isn't far-fetched. Remember his whining after the Eagles demoted him to third corner/safety? You're telling me that can't happen again if the Eagles lose a few games in a row?) Amidst all of the chaos, the Eagles finish with a wild-card spot and get knocked out in the first round. The most likely scenario? Right in the middle. 12-4, a first round bye, and a loss to the Atlanta Falcons in the NFC Championship Game. I'm hoping Philly fans don't break all the windows in my house after this pick.</li>
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<u>3. New England Patriots</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: Tom Brady continues to be Tom Brady, the running game with the Law Firm and Danny Woodhead (or as Joe Theismann called him, Danny Woodcock. Deion Sanders was rolling on the ground laughing for about 5 minutes. I love those guys) finally hits its stride this year (the one thing that was missing from every great Pats team). Ocho experiences a Moss-like revival with Tom Brady. The offensive line and the defensive line improve drastically with the additions of bigger veterans to fill holes on a surprisingly non-physical team. The secondary comes in to its own this year, and Devin McCourty starts his climb up the "best corner in the league" rankings.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario: Brady starts going the way of Peyton Manning as football studio hosts across the country worry about what's wrong with him. The running game collapses due to inconsistancies in the offemsive line. Veterans that the Patriots signed prove to be washed up, and further weakens the offensive/defensive lines. The defense holds the Pats back yet again, ranking in the bottom 5 of the league in points given up and total yards. The Pats go 10-6, losing the division to the Jets, and are ousted from the playoffs in the wild card round.</li>
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<li>Most Likely Scenario: Brady is still Brady, the wide receiver situation improves minimally with the addition of Ocho, and the offensive line also gets only a little better. The defense really steps it up after another year of experience (youngest defense in the league). However, they lose in the AFC Conference Championship to the Steelers.</li>
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<b>Which reminds me.........</b></div>
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<b><u>THE SUPER BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</u></b></div>
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<b><u>PITTSBURGH STEELERS VS ATLANTA FALCONS</u></b></div>
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<b><u>BEGIN!!!!</u></b></div>
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Oops sorry I was thinking of Epic Rap Battles of History. My bad.</div>
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Let's do a quick Dr. Jack breakdown of these two teams to finish the mega-preview:<br />
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<li>Quarterback: Ben Roethlisberger, the most underrated QB in the league. He's a playmaker, a leader, and a rapist. His ability to escape sacks and scramble outside the pocket is amazing and he's got a cannon arm. The guy's been to the Super Bowl before (three times) and won it twice. He's been considered a winner, a whiner, a legend, an injury risk, a seedy bar regular, and a winner again. On the other side is Matt Ryan. Not nearly as much happening with him. Game manager, cool under pressure, definitely not taking anything off the table. However, there's a huge difference between not taking anything off the table and putting things on to the table. I'll go with Roethlisberger.</li>
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<li>Running Backs: Two running backs of nearly equal value. Rashard Mendenhall is a powerful running back that never seems to go down on first contact (the Jets learned that the hard way in the AFC Championship Game). Turner is a nice blend of both speed and power. However, Mendenhall is definitely more consistant than Turner. Both have had troubles with injuries. Since Mendenhall is working his magic behind an infinitely more sucky offensive line, I'm giving this one to the Steelers.</li>
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<li>Wide Receivers: Mike Wallace against Roddy White is pretty even (Both guys are deep ball threats that can completely screw up the other team with one big catch). Hines Ward vs Julio Jones goes to Ward by a mile, although that could definitely change depending on how Julio Jones does this year. Both the Steelers and the Falcons have great depth at wide receiver. The Steelers have Emmanuel Sanders and Antonio Brown, while the Falcons have Harry Douglas and Eric Weems. Tony Gonzalez definitely beats out Heath Miller in the tight end department. Even Gonzalez' blocking is underrated. Wide receivers go to the Falcons by a hair.</li>
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<li>Offensive Line: The Falcons are decent, the Steelers are horrible. Nuff' said. Advantage Falcons.</li>
</ul>
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<li>Defense and Special Teams: Again, the difference between taking things off the table and putting things on it. The Falcons defense is good. Ray Edwards is a good pass rusher, Dunta Robinson is the biggest name among a good secondary, the defense is just good, but not great. The Steelers defense is great. The pass rush will get to Matt Ryan early and often and disrupt what the Falcons are trying to do on offense. The Falcons will come close, but the defense will be their downfall.</li>
</ul>
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<u>The Pick?</u> </div>
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Pittsburgh Steelers: 31 Atlanta Falcons: 17</div>
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That is the end of the Mega Preview. Because I did too much writing this week, I'm taking Week 1 off. Be back next week with my first Picks column. Hasta le Vista everybody.</div>
Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-50804574905009085232011-09-06T16:38:00.000-07:002011-09-09T16:42:13.056-07:00NFL Preview Part III<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Because of the fact that I have stuff to do today (also I'm lazy. Not sure if you picked up on that yet), this is gonna be a four-parter. I'm only covering the playoff pretenders today. Super Bowl Contenders will be tomorrow. So if your favorite team hasn't been mentioned yet and you don't see them in today's piece, then congratulations, they're part of the NFL's elite group of teams in 2011 (unless of course something fluky happens and two or three teams that you see today can sneak in). Also, I am covering the playoff teams in order of how they will be ranked. The Rams will win the NFC West, and get the four seed, but they're still the weakest link in the playoffs. OK now that we cleared that up, here we go.<br />
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<b><u>PLAYOFF PRETENDERS: 12-7</u></b></div>
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<u>12. St Louis Rams</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case and Most Likely Scenario: Sam Bradford takes another huge step forward. Steven Jackson remains one of the best backs in the league. Then, the Rams need to..... OK never mind they play in the NFC West. 9-7 and an average team should be good enough to capture the divison title. Sorry for the lack of paragraph length, but large parts of me are dying now that I have to keep talking about a team from the NFC West.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: 6-10. The defense regresses in the face of a more difficult schedule this year (Philly, NY Giants, and Baltimore make up their September schedule). Sam Bradford experiences a sophomore slump (crossing my fingers that doesn't happen to me this year) and regresses from a pocket awareness standpoint. The Rams finish 3rd in the NFC West. And that, my friends, is the last time I'll have to talk about the NFC West for awhile.</li>
</ul>
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<u>11. Detroit Lions</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario and Most Likely Scenario: Matt Stafford sustains only a few minor injuries throughout the season. Jahvid Best has a breakout year and gives the Lions a running game that they haven't had since Barry Sanders retired. Rookie wideout Titus Young adds depth to a quality receiving corps. The defense, anchored (quite literally) by two behemoth defensive tackles (Ndamukong Suh and Nick Fairley) is much improved from last year. Quality young players take it to the next level on both sides of the football to propel Detroit to a 10-6 record and the 6 seed in the NFC.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: Matthew Stafford can't stay healthy over a full season and the dreaded word "bust" is thrown around. The offense falls in to disarray without a reliable starting quarterback. Nick Fairley can't stay healthy, taking away the Suh-Fairley combination that would have undoubtedly created matchup nightmares for pretty much every offensive line. The secondary stays the same as it was in 2010. The Lions finish 7-9 and third in the NFC North.</li>
</ul>
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<u>10. Houston Texans</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case and Most Likely Scenario: Matt Schaub, Arian Foster, and Andre Johnson all retain their 2010 form all season long. Owen Daniels is finally able to stay healthy for an entire season. The secondary is much improved with the additions of Jonathan Joseph and Danieal Manning. Rookie J.J. Watt comes out of nowhere and wins the defensive rookie of the year award. Mario Williams, Demeco Ryans, and 2009 defensive rookie of the year Brian Cushing help the defense skyrocket from its next to last ratings in 2010 all the way up to the middle of the pack. The Colts stumble with an injured Peyton Manning, allowing the Texans to finally break through and win the AFC South at 11-5.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: It all hinges on the Colts. The Texans are finally good enough to win the division (Yes, the classic "Just when I think I'm out they pulled me back in" team. The "Texans finally get to the playoffs" angle is in a tie for the most overused and incorrect pre-season pick with "Chargers win Super Bowl". Wait, why am I trying to make myself look stupid?) and the Colts are now just non-dominant (not sure if that's a word) enough to lose it. If Manning comes back perfectly healthy and the Texans secondary collapses, then it's back to 7-9 for the Texans and I'll look like double the idiot for ditching the Colts when they still had a healthy Manning.</li>
</ul>
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<u>9. New Orleans Saints</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario: Drew Brees is still Drew Brees, the running back situation doesn't fall apart like last year, and the offensive line continues to dominate. The defense stays pretty much the same. The Saints go 12-4 and win the NFC South and go all the way to the Super Bowl. Basically, everything stays the same from last year, only they get a little more lucky.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: Everything stays the same as last year, only they get more unlucky. Dumb losses (like the Browns' game and the Cardinals' game, where the Saints had two turnovers returned for touchdowns) sink the Saints to 10-6 and a potential near miss in the playoffs.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Most Likely Scenario: Again, everything remains the same. The Saints are the team with the least amount of turnover from last year to this year. Last year, the Saints had some terrible luck and still grabbed the five seed. In 2009, the Saints had great luck and won the Super Bowl. This year? There's no telling what they're luck will be, but it's gotta even out eventually, right? This is the year that the Saints get average luck. The Saints go 12-4, but lose the division to the Falcons.</li>
</ul>
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<u>8. San Diego Chargers</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario and Most Likely Scenario: We're invoking the NFL luck rule again here. I know that picking somebody to be lucky because "they're overdue for it" is illogical and incorrect, but that's how the NFL works. If a team is abnormally lucky or unlucky, it usually swings back the other way or at least to average. The Chargers had the number one offense and the number one defense (both in terms of yards gained/given up), but they allowed a whopping NINE special teams touchdowns. That won't happen again this year. It can't. There is simply too much turnover from year to year on the special teams squad to allow that to happen again. That's what happened with the 09 Steelers, and they made the Super Bowl the next year. The Chargers happened to have the misfortune of one of the crappiest coverage teams in recent memory. Assuming everything stays relatively the same, the Chargers should go 12-4 and win the division. The worst case scenario? Everything that happened last year. How did you like my one sentence worst case scenario? At this point, I'm practically screaming that I'm too lazy to think of intelligent arguments today.</li>
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<u>7. Baltimore Ravens</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario: Like their counterparts in the AFC East, the Ravens finally get over the hump and beat the Pittsburgh Steelers in the playoffs. Anquan Boldin flourishes in his second year with the Ravens' offensive system with Joe Flacco, a reliable quarterback who never seems to do anything stupid. The defense gets back to top 5 form. The pass rush gets to opposing QBs early and often in games. Ed Reed continues to be a dominant safety in the NFL. The Ravens find themselves primed for a Super Bowl run, but get eliminated in the AFC Conference Championship.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: Get ready for another token "I'm too lazy to write a good worst case" paragraph (Sorry, folks. I'll be better tomorrow. Wait, tomorrow is the last day of Summer. Scratch that, you'll get an even worse version of me tomorrow. I know, I'm sorry.) The Ravens get beaten by the Steelers again. I dont see this Ravens team not making the playoffs, but the worst case is they're not better then any of the teams in a top-heavy AFC.</li>
</ul>
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Alright, I typed that last paragraph with my head clunking against my desk and my eyelids starting to close and I have a fantasy draft in 20 minutes. Uh-oh</div>
Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-1328249032819992102011-09-05T18:22:00.000-07:002011-09-09T16:37:23.906-07:00NFL Preview Column Part II<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Welcome to Part II of the preview.<br />
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<b><u>SOMEBODY'S GOTTA BE AVERAGE: 18-22</u></b></div>
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<u>22. Minnesota Vikings</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario: Donovan McNabb regains some of the accuracy and mobility that he had in Philadelphia. One positive is that he got benched for Rex Grossman last year, so there's nowhere to go from that but up. Adrian Peterson continues to be one of the best running backs in the league (his vision and cutbacks are just amazing to watch) without the fumble problems are knee injuries that have been the lone stains on an otherwise promising career. A talented young nucleus of receivers led by Percy Harvin provide suitable targets for McNabb and, in the years to come, Christian Ponder. The defense regains the dominant form that it had in 2009, led by Jared Allen and a healthy secondary. The Vikings take advantage of an easy schedule to finish 10-6 and grab a wild card spot.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: Donovan McNabb proves once and for all that he is washed up, throwing more interceptions than touchdowns as the Vikings start the season 0-4. Leslie Frazier panics and inserts a not-yet-ready Christian Ponder at quarterback, leaving Adrian Peterson and Percy Harvin as the only assets on a depleted offense. The banged-up secondary gets torched, although the Vikings are still strong against the run. The Vikings finish at a dismal 5-11. Thankfully, Brad Childress isn't walking through that door.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Most Likely Scenario: McNabb switches over to his "savvy veteran" mode (Short throws, accurate, a few long ones, no scrambling, each hit reminding us that his ribs may or may not be made out of paper at this point). Adrian Peterson is still a monster behind a respectable O-Line (only gave up 17 sacks last year. What a shame. If only Brett Favre had to play behind the Raiders' O-line, he would have retired years ago.) The receiving corps isn't as bad as last year, although not as good as 2009. The defense returns to respectability. However, another great year from the Packers and a breakout year from the Lions prevent the Vikings from reaching the playoffs. The Vikings finish at 7-9.</li>
</ul>
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<u>21. Cleveland Browns</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case and Most Likely Scenario: Second Year Quarterback Colt McCoy provides hope for the future by throwing for over 3,000 yards and 18 touchdowns. The offense once again revolves around bruising back Peyton Hillis (I wouldn't want to attempt to tackle that man even if I were an NFL Player. It looks like you're trying to tackle a Hummer) who rushes for 1,300 yards. The Browns do not generate much of a pass rush from a defensive line that consists of mostly rookies. The secondary is anchored by Sheldon Brown and Usama Young. Linebacker Scott Fujita serves as the quarterback of the defense. The Browns take advantage of an easy first three months (Cincy,Miami,Tennessee,Oakland,San Fran,Houston,St Louis, Jacksonville) to get off to a 7-4 start, after which they fall back down to 8-8 after a murderous December (Baltimore twice and Pittsburgh twice).</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: Colt McCoy proves that he can't manage the offense, prompting every NFL junkie to look back at the stats from last year, see that he went 2-6 as the starter, and then the floodgates open. Criticism starts pouring down on McCoy, while ignoring the fact that he might as well have Sarah Jessica Parker starting at wide receiver. McCoy's confidence is shaken Chad Henne style, and he goes in to a year-long (if not career-long) downwards slide. The rookies on defense for Cleveland prove to be busts that cant bull their way through offensive linemen like they did in college. The Browns tease their fans by always staying at 2-3 or 5-4 before free-falling faster than Charlie Sheen (Sheen references aren't outdated yet. I hope.) during their final five games to finish a disappoint season at 6-10.</li>
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<u>20. Arizona Cardinals</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case and Most Likely Scenario: Kevin Kolb lives up to his potential in his first sustained starting job. Larry Fitzgerald finally has a half decent quarterback to throw to him (We need to come up with a name for good receivers that are saddled with crappy quarterbacks. I vote for this to be called the Delhomme Zone. It's kinda like the Tyson zone, except for terrible QB's instead of incurably crazy and illogical people). Rookie cornerback Patrick Peterson turns in to a playmaker and a dangerous return man. The defense improves from it's ranking of 29th to about 24th with Paris Lenon and Joey Porter leading the way. Arizona becomes another all offense no defense team, finishes at 8-8, and finishes second in the dismal NFC West. Just know that a small part of me dies any time I have to talk seriously about anything involving the NFC West.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: Kevin Kolb turns in to a gunslinger that constantly has to play from behind because the defense keeps letting big plays happen. Beanie Wells continues to be Beanie Wells, and the offensive line does not help whatsoever. The secondary never fully recovers from the loss of Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie, and Patrick Peterson isn't experienced/talented enough to even attempt to fill that hole. The Cardinals fall to 5-11 and are a threat to move to L.A. in a few years.</li>
</ul>
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<u>19. Miami Dolphins</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario: Chad Henne improves enough to make Brandon Marshall relevant again and proves to be a late blooming quarterback. Reggie Bush and Daniel Thomas duplicate the success that Ronnie Brown and Ricky Williams had running the wildcat offense. Jake Long continues to anchor one of the best offensive lines in the league. Defensively, the switch to the 3-4 highlights the talents of Paul Soliai, a young defensive tackle that allowed star linebacker Cameron Wake (14.5 sacks last year) to come up the middle relatively unblocked. Breakout years from Vontae Davis and Sean Smith elevate an under appreciated defense to "best in the league" status. The Dolphins upstage the Jets, go 10-6, and grab the 5 seed.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: Chad Henne isn't a late bloomer and is just plain awful (the more likely scenario). Reggie Bush can't recapture any of his USC magic and does not date anybody that even approaches Kim Kardashian, kinda hard to do when you're a single football player in Miami. Brandon Marshall is the league's newest player to officially land in the Delhomme Zone. Defensively, the switch to the 3-4 system overwhelms the secondary, who can't win the one on one matchups necessary to make the 3-4 work. The Dolphins sink to 6-10 and dead last in the AFC East.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Most Likely Scenario: Henne improves from last year (not a hard thing to do unless you're name is Tarvaris Jackson). Reggie Bush and Daniel Thomas replicate most of the success that Williams and Brown had with the wildcat. Brandon Marshall and his cast of complimentary receivers raise their stats up from last year, but not by a large amount. The defense continues to be a force that will rank in the top 5 of the league. However, a tough schedule will limit the Dolphins to an 8-8 finish.</li>
</ul>
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<u>18. Kansas City Chiefs</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario: Everything unfolds in the exact same way that it did last year. Jamaal Charles continues to be one of the most explosive running backs in the league. Matt Cassel and Dwayne Bowe continue to be one of the most underrated QB-WR tandems in the league. The defense continues to be average. The Chiefs finish 10-6 and grab a wild card spot. The odds of all of this happening while moving from the easiest schedule in the league to the hardest is something like 4,000,000 to 1.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario and Most likely Scenario: The Chiefs take a bunch of steps backward, purely because of the schedule. Games against the Chargers (twice), the Jets, the Patriots, the Dolphins, the Colts, the Steelers, and the Packers will all contribute to a significant dop-off in overall production. The Chiefs will be facing an elite quarterback in six games on their schedule. The Chiefs only had to face three last year (and none of them were at their best). The Chiefs have enough easy games and winnable games to finish 8-8, but it will be significantly tougher than last year,</li>
</ul>
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<b><u>IF YOU AIN'T FIRST, YOU'RE LAST: 13-17</u></b></div>
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<u>17. Chicago Bears</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario: Another team where the best case scenario was pretty much realized last year. I shouldn't have to bother writing it down. Just look at the Bears' whole 2010 season and consider that the best case for this year. Specifically, there's no way that they win so many close games, get so many easy opponents, or get as many lucky breaks (Calvin Johnson's nullified catch, a weak NFC that allowed them to claim the two seed with an 11-5 record, and getting to play an emotionally drained Seattle team in the divisional round. They even could have made it to the Super Bowl if Jay Cutler didn't tear his MCL. The Packers had so many opportunities to put that game away, but they kept blowing it. I'm telling you, the Bears were LUCKY.)</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: 4-12. No joke. The Bears were a slightly more extreme example of the 2006 Jets. OK quarterback, great running game, a lucky win or two, a very easy schedule, and a win or two by pure chance. The only difference is, the Jets played a Wild Card game against a Pats team that should have gone to the Super Bowl (that was the year they collapsed in Indy). The Bears had the luxury of playing Seattle. The next season, that Jets team imploded in to a 4-12 mess. The Bears have an aging defense, an inconsistent quarterback, and nobody that tied them to that 11-5 record. You always know that the Patriots would never lose it the year after a Super Bowl win because they had Tom Brady and no team that had an elite QB like Brady should ever finish below 9-7 for any reason. I don't feel any of that with Chicago.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Most Likely Scenario: 9-7. I know, it's an optimistic prediction, but the Bears do have some winnable games on their schedule. As long as the front seven can pressure opposing quarterbacks and hold opposing running games to reasonable yardage, then the Bears can get away with another smoke and mirrors 9-7. The only thing that could really submarine the team is a porous offensive line (remember that 10 sack game against the Giants?) that didn't look any better in the preseason. Starting at left tackle (the most important position because it protects the quarterback's blind side) is JaMarcus Webb (feel the irony!!) that gave up 11 sacks last year. 11 sacks! They should just call him the Human Turnstile at this point. Anyways, I predict another good, not great, year for the Bears before the wheels fall off in 2012.</li>
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<u>16. New York Giants</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: Eli Manning throws less interceptions than his league-leading total of 25 in 2010. Both Nicks and Manningham have "Top 30 receivers in the league" seasons to make up for the loss of Steve Smith and Kevin Boss. The front seven will have to dominate almost to the extent of the 2007 team, which does not seem unreasonable considering the Giants have two players who had sack totals in the double digits. However, the Giants have a secondary that's very susceptible to getting injured. As long as everybody in the secondary stays healthy, the Giants should be just fine. The best case scenario for the Giants are that the Eagles tumble and the Giants, winning every game that they should win and even a few that they shouldn't have, go 11-5 and steal the division title from Philly.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario: The Giants' offense, hampered by the loss of Steve Smith and Kevin Boss, sputters. Eli Manning throws just as many interceptions as the year before and Ahmad Bradshaw gets stymied when opponents realize that it's very easy to turn the Giants' offense in to a one dimensional entity. The secondary breaks down, with long term injuries to Kenny Phyllips and Corey Webster. Because of these injuries, Michael Vick and Tony Romo are able to light up the scoreboard against the Giants, who finish with a 7-9 record (featuring an 0-4 mark against the Cowboys and Eagles). After the season, some members of the New York media turn in to cannibals and eat Tom Coughlin alive.</li>
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<li>Most Likely Scenario: Exactly in the middle. The Giants finish with a respectable 9-7 record, just missing out on a playoff spot against the Cowboys on the last day of the season. The offense drops from a top 5 offense to a better than average offense with an equal chance of knocking you out early and knocking themselves out early. The defense is solid, but not anywhere near the 2007 team. The secondary sustains several short-term injuries which cost the Giants a game or two. The season includes another heartbreaking loss to Phyilly on a last second touchdown pass by Michael Vick. Tom Coughlin turns in to a human volcano and actually explodes afterwards (I'm not ruling this out).</li>
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<u>15. Tampa Bay Buccaneers</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: A breakout year from Josh Freeman propels Tampa Bay in to the playoffs as the 5 seed. A strong offensive line and more punishing running from LeGarette Blount establishes the Bucs identity as a strong, physical team that can make big plays and get first downs on a regular basis. Rookies Da'Quan Bowers and Mason Foster excel in an underrated Tampa Bay defense. Young corner Aqib Talib and ageless wonder Ronde Barber make a great combination at corner, rounding out a complete defense.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario: Josh Freeman, despite all signs to the contrary, regresses in his third year. LeGarrette Blount proves to be a one year wonder, taking away a key element in Tamp Bay's offense. Da'Quan Bowers' bad knees prevent him from being a capable pro. Aqib Talib's off the field incidents (he is currently indicted on reckless endangerment charges) catch up with him, taking away another piece of Tampa's young core. Ronde Barber retires after the season and Tampa Bay becomes a less dramatic example of the NBA's mid 80s Rockets teams (a talented young nucleus that was well positioned for the future self combusts after troubles with the law, injuries, and overall bad luck).</li>
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<li>Most Likely Scenario: The offense takes another big step forward, advancing from the 19th ranked offense all the way up to number 12. The defense, however, prevents the Bucs from reaching the playoffs. The loss of savvy veteran Barrett Ruud is not only a severe blow to the veteran leadership, but it also takes away the perfect middle linebacker needed to play the Tampa 2 style that the Bucs have found so much success with over the years. The Bucs finish out the year at 9-7, and are primed to assert themselves in the division race for the next 5 to 6 years.</li>
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<b><u>SURPRISE PICK OF THE YEAR</u></b> </div>
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<u>14. Indianapolis Colts</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: Peyton Manning's injury does not cost him any playing time or cause any long term problems. The old guard of Wayne, Clark, Freeney, Mathis does not show any signs of age. Nobody on the offensive line gets injured, so Peyton Manning never has to coordinate protections or rush throws. The Colts take advantage of a semi-depleted AFC South to cruise to a 13-3 record and the number 1 seed in the AFC. Also, I look really stupid for picking the Colts to collapse.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario and Slice's Most Likely Scenario: Peyton Manning is never the same. Neck surgery is serious stuff. Something is going to be a little different for the rest of the season. Maybe his throws won't be quite as on point. Maybe he'll miss a wide open Reggie Wayne a few times this season as everybody wonders where Peyton Manning has gone. I'm not saying he'll fall off the face of the Earth, I'm just saying that he won't be as effective as before. Not only that, center Jeff Saturday is getting up there (he turns 36 soon), and the whole left side of the offensive line consists of rookies. That's kind of important since rookies make mistakes. A mistake from a quarterback leads to a turnover. A mistake from an O-Lineman leads to his QB being drilled by a vicious hit. Manning's body can only take so many more of them before it starts to give out. Not one of the Colts' important players are below thirty. Facing a younger, better prepared AFC, the Colts will still post a respectable 10-6 record. However, this is the year where the Texans finally break through to win the division. The Colts go 10-6, and get beaten out by the 10-6 Ravens and the 11-5 Jets for the Wild Card spots.</li>
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<u>13. Dallas Cowboys</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario and Most Likely: Romo suffers no lingering side effects from the injury and returns to form. Felix Jones turns in to the poor man's Jamaal Charles, a running back with impressive acceleration and good vision at the line of scrimmage. The offensive line does an adequate job of protecting Romo, who finds any of his big play wide receivers early and often in the season. The Cowboys achieve some form of competency on defense, an area where they have underachieved for so many years, and finish at 10-6, good enough for the dubious "best team to miss the playoffs" honors.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario: Tony Romo comes back from his injury and tries to win games by himself and ends up getting picked off when he throws in to double coverages. The new additions on the offensive line give Romo no protection at all. As a result, Romo reinjures himself and misses a large majority of the season. The defense remains just as putrid as it was last year. The Cowboys fall to 6-10 and last in the division. Jerry Jones fires everybody up to and including the night shift janitor.</li>
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Part III is coming tomorrow night with 12-7 The Playoff Pretenders and 6-1 The Super Bowl Contenders. Wait for it.........Wait for it............Wait for it......... <b><u>WE CAN BUILD ON THIS</u></b>!!!!!!<br />
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Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-79838791598094552042011-09-04T19:54:00.000-07:002011-09-09T16:26:28.782-07:00NFL Preview Column Part 1<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Football season is almost upon us. After an extended lockout (which everybody should just pretend never happened from now on) the NFL is open for business. So without further ado, welcome to the Mega Preview. We'll be going through all 32 teams and covering what the best-case scenario, worst-case scenario, and most likely scenario is. These scenarios are excluding any injuries (unless a specific team or player is more likely to be injured.) or any wild-card scenarios (Peyton Manning gets traded to the Bills, a player dies, or the cameras malfunction in Foxboro.) This part will be covering the Crown Turds and the We Don't have Ourselves Advancing Sections. Tomorrow will cover the Ordinary Teams and Playoff Pretenders sections. Tuesday will be the Playoff Contenders section. One disclaimer before we start; the rankings here are how I think the NFL Teams will be ranked at the end of the year. For instance, (Spoiler Alert!!!) I have the Rams making the playoffs and Indy missing them (I'll explain why later). However, I think that Indy is much better than St Louis. However, since I have St Louis going to the playoffs and Indy not going, St Louis will be ranked better than Indy. <br />
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<b><u>28-32: THE CROWN TURDS OF THE NFL</u></b></div>
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<u>32.Cincinatti Bengals</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: 6-10 is the best case scenario for the Bengals. I don't see them going higher than that. Ruling out a wild-card scenario (Andy Dalton, against all evidence to the contrary, turns in to Peyton Manning circa 2004) the Bengals are just such an incomplete team and have too many holes to go much of anywhere. The best-case scenario here is that they turn in to a frisky mini-sleeper, steal a win or two from average opponents, and have a win total that exceeds Cedric Benson's jail time (in years).</li>
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<li>Worst-Case Scenario: For future reference, I will not bother to do all three scenarios (best,worst,and likely) if a team's worst or best case scenario doubles as their most likely one. There are so many things that can and probably will go wrong with this Bengals team that I dont know where to start. The defense is a mess. Jonathan Joseph is gone. Andy Dalton looked closer to Ryan Leaf than Matt Ryan in the pre-season. The Bengals handled the Carson Palmer situation so eggregiously that Palmer would willingly retire from football over spending a year (or more) in football purgatory after the Bengals refused to dump him while he still might have some value. The Bengals are an all offense no defense team, minus the offense. Something tells me that a 2-14 season is looking pretty likely at this point. The Bengals also drafted Andy Dalton at the perfect time to knock themselves out of the Andrew Luck sweepstakes.</li>
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<li>A few bad signs: I was reading the SI NFL Preview issue yesterday to take some notes for the column. For each team, SI focused on one specific area of the team that is newsworthy, undervalued, interesting, etc. For the Bengals, they chose to focus on the motivational signs in the team locker room. Not only is it a bad sign when SI (which tried to put every single team in a good light) says to themselves "There is nobody on this team that's worth writing a single word about", but it also reveals something else. The Bengals are literally having to talk themselves in to this season. I thought this might be a bad sign.</li>
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<u>31. Washington Redskins</u></div>
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<li>Best-Case Scenario: John Beck turns out to be one of those quarterbacks that aren't good until their late 20s, Rex Grossman does his best Anyone besides Rex Grossman impression, and the ground game overperforms. Even so, the defense will have to exceed expectations in a Cincinatti Bengals 2009 kind of way. One of the toughest schedules in the league does not help. Best case scenario for the Redskins is also 6-10.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario: The quarterback situation turns in to a disaster and the offensive line collapses. The Redskins are still winless at the end of October. Daniel Snyder panic-fires Mike Shanahan. At least Andrew Luck will be a viable option in next year's draft.</li>
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<li>Bad Signs: When John Beck and Rex Grossman are in a battle to be the starting quarterback on your team, something has gone terribly wrong.</li>
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<u>30. Carolina Panthers</u></div>
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<li>Best-Case Scenario: Cam Newton turns out to be an excellent game manager, DeAngelo Williams takes pressure off of his rookie quarterback, and the re-signed veterans on defense (Beason,Johnson,Davis, and Gamble) all have career years. The Panthers finish 8-8 and turn in to a reasonable copy of the 2010 Bucs (a team that is positioned well for the future and is one of the most exciting teams in the league).</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario: Cam Newton turns out to be the biggest bust of the last 10 years (not as unlikely as you would think). Steve Smith far exceeds his 2009 record of 87 eye rolls and 46 exasperated expressions as Newton zips balls 5 feet over his head (a la Jake Delhomme). The defense goes in to a relapse as the veterans start coasting, knowing that it won't matter since they're protected by their new long-term contracts. A million different studio analysts say "Cam Newton can be good, but he is getting no HELP!!!" in roughly three dozen different ways. Newton ends up re-enacting the career of Vince Young (another college standout turned pro bust that Newton shows shocking similarities with.) The Panthers improve to 3-13.</li>
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<li>Most Likely Scenario: Cam Newton is a slow developer, but gets the hang of the offense by the end of the year. The Panthers finish 5-11 with two victories coming inside the toughest division in football. Williams has an average season, and the defense starts to move towards the middle of the pack in terms of points and yards allowed. The Panthers fill in some more holes in next year's draft and are set up to become fringe playoff contenders for the next year or two.</li>
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<li>Bad Signs: Half of the starters on defense last year were re-signed by the Panthers in the last two years. Because when you finish 2-14 and you're in a rebuilding effort, the one thing that you should always do is sign back the defense that let up over 25 points per game last year. That should do the trick.</li>
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<u>29. Buffalo Bills</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: Ryan Fitzpatrick turns in to a good quarterback that can direct the offense and take off running at any time. The exciting young players (Fred Jackson, Brad Smith, Steve Johnson, and C.J. Spiller) steal at least two victories from the jaws of defeat. The defense improves just enough that it's considered below average and not a flatlining liability. Shawne Merriman recovers from his slew of injuries and turns back the clock to the 2006 version of himself. Marcell Dareus turns in to the perfect big man for the 3-4 defense. The Bills go 8-8.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario The Bills discover that they can't make the playoffs with Ryan Ftizpatrick as their quarterback and feel stupid for sinking so low that they were forced to start an Ivy League quarterback. The young playmakers turn out to be busts (especially C.J. Spiller, who turns out to be one of those "All speed No vision" guys that fail in the NFL after dominating in college. Even if C.J. Spiller fails, the Bills can at least look forward to the Raiders overpaying him, triggering a pulse in Al Davis for the first time in centuries). Marcell Dareus turns in to a younger version of Albert Haynewsorth (a grumpy superstar with effort problems that tries to coast on talent). Shawne Merriman gets injured again and the Bills continue to be gashed up the middle by decent running backs. The Bills finish 3-13 in a tough division and are a serious threat to relocate to L.A.</li>
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<li>Most Likely Scenario: The Bills start a brief upward trend. Fitzpatrick is good enough to carry them for another few years, the Johnson-Smith-Spiller-Jackson combo turns in to one of the most secretly fascinating offensive combinations in the AFC, and the offensive line is able to hold its own. The defense improves, but not drastically. The Bills finish 5-11 and are still a threat to relocate.</li>
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<u>28. Jacksonville Jaguars</u></div>
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*This is the only Crown Turd that has potential to (Gasp!!) reach the playoffs.</blockquote>
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<li>Best-Case Scenario: Blaine Gabbert seamlessly converts from the spread offense to the pro (not as difficult as you may think.) In a related story, Blaine Gabbert has the most potential to be a good pro quarterback out of anybody in last year's draft. Then again, it's either him or the following options ;Vince Young clone, Jake Locker (cannon arm, mobile, not accurate, does not handle blitzes well. Reminds me of a guy that played for the Raiders recently. You can guess who that is.), Christian "I'm not even bothering to hide the fact that I'm completely terrified" Ponder, and Andy "Why did I get stuck in football jail (figuratively and literally)" Dalton. Maurice Jones-Drew keeps up his stellar performance (not very likely, the left side of the line could not be more cooked), and the five new defensive starters help the Jags become a team that can hold its own. Aaron Kampman comes back from the ACL Tear better than ever. The Jags take advantage of a Colts collapse, another teaser season by Houston, and a rebuilding year for the Titans to claim the AFC South division title.</li>
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<li>Worst and Most Likely Scenario: Maurice Jones-Drew is stymied by an offensive line that can't run block to save their lives. By Week 8, the Jags formally request to replace the O-Line with statues. Gabbert gets off to a slow start in his rookie year. The defense shows no improvement, and the pass rush is still non-existant. Aaron Kampman re-tears his ACL (not at all unlikely). Nobody steps up at wide receiver to give Gabbert any help at all. The Jags finish 5-11 and begin year two of rebuilding.</li>
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<b><u>23-27 WE DONT HAVE OURSELVES ADVANCING IN OUR OWN PLAYOFF BRACKET</u></b></div>
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<u>27. San Fransisco 49ers</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: San Fran breaks its infamous streak of 8 losing seasons. Frank Gore goes an entire season without missing a game (unofficial odds on this; 8:1). Alex Smith does a reasonable impression of any quarterback in the league besides Alex Smith, and a talented nucleus of receivers on offense (Vernon Davis, Michael Crabtree, and Braylon Edwards) make Niners football watchable. The transition to the 3-4 defense helps highlight the playmaking prowess of Patrick Willis and elevates him to "league's premier linebacker" status. The secondary holds its own after losing Nate Clements and missing out on Nnamdi Asomugha. The Niners take advantage of the weakest division in football and finish 8-8.</li>
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<li>Worst Case Scenario: Frank Gore injures his knee and misses a significant portion of the year (odds on this happening; 5:1). Alex Smith continues to be Alex Smith and keeps producing more groundballs than Derek Jeter in a slump. Braylon Edwards turns back in to a mopey drop machine and Michael Crabtree's stats fall significantly. Vernon Davis will still catch at least 6 touchdowns. The inexperience on secondary (especially after changing to a 3-4) is exposed constantly as the Niners replace the Texans as the team that every quarterback wants to play. The 3-4 turns in to a disaster, and Jim Harbaugh proves to be no better than Mike Singletary (no small feat).</li>
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<li>Most Likely Scenario: The receivers and running back Frank Gore turn Alex Smith in to a poor man's Matt Cassel circa 2008. The defense gets shredded as the 3-4 system fails without a reliable nose tackle. Departures in the secondary hurt the Niners. San Fran ends up turning in to a less extreme example of the 04-06 Cincinatti Bengals (Explosive offense and an opportunistic defense that creates turnovers and gives up huge chunks of yardage). The Niners finish the season at 6-10.</li>
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<u>26. Oakland Raiders</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: Darren McFadden matches or exceeds his totals from last year (nearly impossible with two rookies and a former second-teamer starting on the offensive line). A Raiders receiver notches over 700 yards (nobody did it last year, not even new acquisition Kevin Boss). The secondary survives the loss of Nnamdi Asomugha and the front secen steps up big time. The Raiders finish at 9-7 for their first winning season since Al Davis was alive.</li>
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<li>Worst and Most Likely Scenario: Jason Campbell continues to be Jason Campbell. Darren McFadden does not even gain 800 yards after being saddled with an O-Line that rivals the 05 Raiders and 03 Texans in the "If you're the quarterback or running back that has to line up behind this mess, consider ordering the premium health care package" department. The secondary does not survive in the wake of losing Nnamdi Asomugha and reverts to pre-Nnamdi levels. Rolando McClain is considered the lone bright spot, notching over 100 tackles, before announcing that he will leave when his contract expires to play for a professional football team. The Raiders finish 6-10 and finish once again in the cellar of the AFC West, after which Al Davis grows fangs and several Raiders employees go missing.</li>
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<u>25. Tennessee Titans</u></div>
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<li>Best Case Scenario: Jake Locker bucks the trend of strong-armed draft busts to become Tennessee's savior at quarterback. The offensive line lives up to its billing as one of the best in the league. Chris Johnson is able to shake the constant 7 and 8 man fronts that are consistantly thrown at him and maintains his status as the best running back in the league. A revamped front seven (featuring veteran leader Barrett Ruud, rookie Akeem Ayers, and reliable linebacker Will Witherspoon) forces opposing offenses to attack the secondary, where stalwarts Cortland Finnegan and Michael Griffin have career years. Cortland Finnegan fights Andre Johnson a second time and doesn't get the snot beaten out of him again. The Titans take advantage of weak years from either the AFC South, the Jets, or the Ravens to grab a playoff spot.</li>
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<li>Worst and Most Likely Scenario: The Titans sputter out of the gate to a 1-4 or 0-5 start. Desperately looking for a spark, the Titans turn the offense over to JaJake Russell, who eventually lays a worse egg than Brady Quinn on the 08 Browns. Opponents are not at all scared by the Titans passing game, leading to the first ever instance where a team puts 9 in the box on a regular first and 10 to stop Chris Johnson. The offensive line and the defense remain solid. The Titans finish 6-10 and Herm Edwards yells "THEY CAN BUILD ON THIS!!!!" at least three times during the season. Just know that the over/under for the number of "THEY CAN BUILD ON THIS!!!!!" references from any analyst is about 4.5.</li>
</ul>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<u>24. Seattle Seahawks</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario: Tarvaris Jackson turns in to a poor man's Michael Vick (unofficial odds of this happening; 450,000:1). The rookies on the O-Line protect Tarvaris and let him scramble. Earl Thomas anchors an average secondary as Seattle's only strong home-grown talent. The Seahawks take advantage of a sophomore slump from Sam Bradford, a subpar season in Arizona, and a stumbling 49ers team to claim a second straight division title at 7-9. In a related story, I'm not quite sure how I'd react if the Jets missed the playoffs at 10-6 and the Seahawks made it in at 7-9. Throw up? Write my local congressman? Handle it Rex Ryan style with a vat of chicken wings? Pretend it didn't happen? Too many possibilities.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst and most likely Scenario: Pete Carroll decides that every pass play should involve five receivers standing next to each other in the middle of the field and Tarvaris just throwing it up for grabs. The Seahawks adopt this method and it improves Jackson's completion percentage (I hope I'm joking.) More seriously, Seattle adopts the West Coast offense and challenges Jackson to complete more than fifty percent of his passes within five yards (I'm not apologizing at any point for these Tarvaris Jackson jokes. If there were a halftime contest for football that was the reverse of the half court shot in basketball, maybe a throw through the goalposts from the 25 yard line, and I had to pick one QB to miss it for a million dollars, I would pick Jackson. Not only would I pick him, I would have already spent that million. He's that awful). Marshawn Lynch proves that his sensational 67 yard run against the Saints was one bright spot in a depressing career. The front seven gets pounded up the middle by bigger running backs. The secondary and the offensive line remain decent. The Seahawks finish at 6-10 and third in the NFC.</li>
</ul>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<u>23. Denver Broncos</u></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Best Case Scenario: Kyle Orton retains his form from a year ago and proves to be one of the more exciting quarterbacks in the league. Knowshon Moreno sustains his role as a touchdown vulture and gets in the end zone 10 times. Brandon Lloyd matches his production totals from last year, and Eddie Royal hauls in at least 70 passes. All-Star offensive lineman Ryan Clady keeps Orton protected from his blind-side. The defense is reinvigorated with the return of Elvis Dumervil and all-star rookie Von Miller. Veterans Champ Bailey and Brian Dawkins shake off the rust and lead the defense to respectability. The Broncos finish at 9-7.</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Worst Case Scenario: Kyle Orton regresses, leaving Broncos' fans to wonder if he will ever regain his 2010 form (Ditto for Brandon Lloyd). The rest of the offense dips in production, but not by a significant margin. The defense does not get any better with the return of Dumervil. Von Miller turns out to be yet another bust. Brian Dawkins and Champ Bailey have the Brett Favre Memorial "Uh, can I get a do-over on that whole coming back from retirement thing?" face going all season long as opposing quarterbacks harass the Broncos defense. Broncos fans lament that they could have had Cutler and Marshall in their primes if Josh McDaniel didn't tick Cutler off (Huge mistake on his part. If you have an established young franchise quarterback, why would you try to trade him? Quick Analogy: I have a girlfriend {huge leap of faith here people. Remember, an ANALOGY. As far as you know.} This girlfriend and I have been together for about a year. I start telling my friends that I want to dump her for another girl. She hears this news and starts to get angry. I pretend it never happened. Eventually, she just ends up dumping me. The lesson for all football coaches here is that if you can envision that a move you're about to make would make your longtime wife/girlfriend angry if you did it to her, you might not want to try it with your franchise quarterback. OK, the rambling analogy is over).</li>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Most Likely Scenario: Somewhere in between. Orton takes a small step back (as does the rest of the offense), but not significantly enough to cost them the season. The defense will definitely improve from its last in the league position, but not enough to put the Broncos in position to make the playoffs. Elvis Dumervil gets 8 or 9 sacks and D.J. Williams serves as a nice compliment. The Broncos go 7-9 and finish third in the AFC West.</li>
</ul>
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Today was a very long column. It could have been better, it could have been worse. But just remember that WE CAN BUILD ON THIS!!!!!! Part II coming tomorrow.</div>
Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-39484379189677219982011-08-16T14:49:00.000-07:002011-09-09T14:07:43.089-07:00Football Hall of Fame<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
This was originally going to be a baseball column. I was going to spend an hour researching stuff and reviewing all of the playoff contenders. That's going to have to wait until next week. Because I got a much better, much easier idea. I recently paid a visit to the football Hall of Fame in Canton,Ohio (nicknamed Franchise City by yours truly. Any chain restaurant or chain store can be found there. It sickens me.) The Hall of Fame is very impressive from the outside. It's a massive circular structure with a huge glass football on the top. It looks like you could fly a small airplane inside of it. You would expect that it would take days to go through (much like the baseball hall of fame). You would expect that you would learn every single important thing there is to know about football by the time you left. This was not at all the case. The football hall of fame took three hours to look through. THREE HOURS. You can't even get past the first floor of the baseball hall of fame in three hours! The most glaring problem with the football hall of fame was that it payed almost no attention to football in the 70s,80s,90s, and early 2000s. Imagine if the Baseball Hall of Fame did that. The amateur fan could walk through and learn everything there is to know about Babe Ruth, Honus Wagner, Ty Cobb, etc. However, if somebody asked that fan "Who is Hank Aaron and why did he matter?", he would have no clue. Sounds stupid, right? That's what the football hall of fame did. If a fan walked in knowing absolutely nothing, he would walk out and still have no clue who Dan Marino was. This thing needs to be cleaned out. Take every single display off the shelf. Maybe even set a torch to the Tom Brady jersey (I never promised that this column wouldn't be biased.) Start from scratch. Here's what needs to happen after that.<br />
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Rebuild or add on to the existing Hall of Fame. Don't whine about lack of funding. More than half of the Hall of Fame (including the Archives and the research stations) are off limits to the public. That's how we end up with a Hall of Fame that is anywhere from 25 to 50 percent of what it should be. We need more space, otherwise it's going to end up as only a few hours again. Another two floors or even another wing/new building is necessary to make the tour last a day.<br />
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My vision for the first wing of the Hall of Fame is walking through a series of rooms with each room representing a different era. I would break the rooms down in to 1900s-1930,1930-1950,1950-1970,1970-1980,1980-1990,1990-2000,2000-Present Day. The rooms can be condensed every decade or so, but every era of football history needs to be represented. Included in these rooms should be a chronological sequence of what happened in each era and why it mattered. Things like rule changes, great games, best players, equipment and other artifacts from that time period, and other noteworthy items should all be displayed in each era's room. Also, instead of having all of the Hall of Fame plaques (football players usually get busts instead of plaques, but plaques look cooler) in one room, each player/influential figure in the Hall of Fame should be place in his respective era with a brief explanation of what he did on his plaque. These rooms would take up the entire first wing of the Hall of Fame.<br />
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The second wing of the Hall of Fame would be the theaters. The Hall of Fame already has one theater, but that's not enough. We need to get at least 7 or 8 different theaters, each showing a different NFL production. One of the theaters could show a football movie, one of them could show Road to the Super Bowl (one of the few things that I would keep about the current Hall of Fame), etc. At least two of them should be 3-D to provide viewers with the ultimate football experience. The whole purpose of the second wing is to provide a visual and auditory aspect to the whole experience. The first wing is where you go to read about football. The second wing is where you go to see football. It would also be nice to have Rich Eisen on retainer for occasional film commentary. <br />
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Wing number three should be about the evolution of football related products, interactive exhibits, memorabilia, and eating. There should be sections on the history of football video games, how Fatheads came to be, and things of that nature. The interactive exhibits should include an XBOX 360 for Madden, a football trivia contest (note that the Hall of Fame has these two things, but the current trivia contest is so outdated that when they ask you to pick a "team" to play as, they include the Houston Oilers. They also still count the Bills as a team.), and a hanging rubber tire to throw footballs through. We could also have exhibits where you can relive moments from the NFL Season. If you want, you can have Cortland Finnegan punch you in the gut, James Harrison curse you out, and things of that nature. The rest of the floor should consist of a huge sports memorabilia store and three restaurants/bars (The Postgame Spread, Up the Gut Wings, and Romeo Crennel's Old World Pizza).<br />
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Wing number four of the Hall of Fame should be about the Top 10. The Top 10 lists should span everything in football that one can make a Top 10 for. Right off the bat, I would include the following, Best Games, Best Teams, Best Players, Best at Each Position, Biggest busts, Most one-sided Trades, Most significant moments in football history, Best Bloopers, Best Records, and biggest egos. We can even have players and well-conected broadcasters vote on things like Most Likely to Commit a Felony, Craziest Guy, Worst Tipper, and Least Liked Player. Accompanying each Top 10 section should be a television screen with a "Sportscenter Top Plays" style countdown with visual evidence and accompanying highlights to back up each choice. The centerpiece of this section will be the video library. At least 15 of those booths that they have in arcades where you step in and get your picture taken should be set up in the middle of the floor with an HD viewing screen. Visitors would have access to a touch-screen that could navigate NFL history and find any highlight from any game. I'm not resting until this happens.<br />
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So there is your Hall of Fame. The four wings of the Hall cover everything that one would ever really need to know about this great sport. The only other thing that I would include is occasional guest speakers and ex-football players. I'm open to other improvements as well. Specialized rooms that can be rented for fantasy drafts, a section devoted to influential non-players, a mock broadcast booth where you can announce great moments in NFL History, a huge artifact room with most of the archives on display (as well as an Unintentional Comedy Artifact Room including things like Cris Carter's muscle shirt that he wore on air last year, anything from the Miami-Buffalo game in Canada, an autographed football from the Eagles-Bengals tie game, and the camera that was found in the Meadowlands after Jets-Pats) and a video game based on NBA All-Star Weekend in Vegas (You lose if you get shot by Pacman Jones) are all projects that I would be open to for the future. Otherwise, there is nothing wrong with the Hall of Fame model that I have just created. All of the essential knowledge of football (and then some) can be absorbed. You would definitely spend more than a day here. And you would always walk out saying "That was awesome." One can only dream.</div>
Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-55257241372223672922011-08-04T20:28:00.000-07:002011-09-09T14:06:33.298-07:00Birth of Football's Dream Team...... or is it?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I never thought it would be the Eagles. I always thought it would be somebody else. We christened the 07 Patriots as a Dream Team, a prediction that they lived up to for 18 out of the 19 games they played. They looked, acted, and felt like the typical dream team. The 07 Patriots assembled what might be considered the best offense in the history of the NFL. Brady,Moss,Welker, and Maroney are some of the most recognizable names from that offense. Cameras would zoom in for close-ups of the opposing defense when the Pats were ahead by three touchdowns and the look on each defender's face said the exact same thing <em>"We can't stop these guys"</em>. Not only did those Pats play like a dream team, they felt like a dream team as well. They were hated by anybody who wasn't a fan of them (this role is now held by the Jets and Steelers). They went through a scandal that got blown out of proportion. Everybody wondered if somebody could beat them. And finally, somebody did. The point is, the Patriots felt like they were destined to have a Dream Team some day. Every Pats fan knew that if Brady got decent receivers, he could do amazing things. And he did. All of those elements combined made the Patriots the Miami Heat of the NFL. And I absolutely despised them. What does this have to do with the Eagles? Flash forward (What is the opposite of flashback? Flash forward? Un-flashback? I'm so confused.) to the present day. The Eagles pull off one of the best offseasons in recent memory. They swoop in and outwork the Jets for star cornerback Nnamdi Asomugha. Over the coming days, the Eagles sign Jason Babin and Cullen Jenkins to shore up holes on their defensive line. Star wide receiver DeSean Jackson ends his holdout. Suddenly, this team starts looking good. A little <em>too</em> good. Some talk of "Dream Team" and "Miami Heat of the NFL" starts getting floated around. Cowboys defensive coordinator Buddy Ryan (the brother of Jets coach Jabba the Hutt [real name, Rex Ryan]) took shots at the Eagles, calling them the all-hype team among other things. To be fair, the general public created most of that hype themselves. But the Eagles feel too likable to be a dream team. Star quarterback Michael Vick is a great story of how people can change and get a second chance in life. Nnamdi Asomugha won the NFL's humanitarian award multiple times. And the coach, Andy Reid, looks like the uncle that always falls asleep on the couch at Thanksgiving. Let's break this team down:<br />
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Quarterback: All set here. Michael Vick is arguably the best quarterback in the league. Vick is an accurate passer that also happens to be speedier than most running backs. He's an original prototype that hasn't been seen before in the NFL and it will probably be a long time before it is seen again. Another year of greatness just to prove that year one wasn't a fluke would be nice though. The Eagles also locked down Vince Young in free agency. He should provide a suitable backup in place of Kevin Kolb.</li>
</ul>
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<br /></div>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>Running Back: LeSean McCoy is a developing running back. He showed promise last year and is only going to get better. McCoy isn't the speediest back, but he makes people miss. His toughness is an underrated part of his game and he can always pick up the first down on those third and 1 scenarios that always hindered the Eagles in previous years. Ronnie Brown also signed on to split time with LeSean McCoy. Brown is another back that is better than a lot of people think. It will be interesting to see how Andy Reid utilizes them.</li>
</ul>
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<li>Wide Receiver: The number 1 wide receiver position is filled by DeSean Jackson, one of the most explosive wide receivers in the NFL and a shameless showboat. The number 2 receiver opposite Jackson is Jeremy Maclin. Maclin caught 10 touchdown passes last year and really benefits from the constant attention that must be paid to Jackson. Other decent wide receivers such as Jason Avant and Riley Cooper round out one of the deepest receiving corps in the NFL. At tight end, Brent Celek is everything you'd ever want. A good blocker to create daylight for McCoy. A reliable pass catcher. A big target in the red zone that can get open. The Eagles have weapons. And then some.</li>
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<li>Offensive Line: Not bad. The center and right guard positions could be shored up (ESPN lists the starters at these positions to be Mike McGlynn and Danny Watkins. If Mike McGlynn and Danny Watkins are even being considered for a starting role on your O-line, then something has gone terribly wrong). The other three positions are OK. Winston Justice, Jason Peters, and Todd Herremans anchor a strong left side of the line. Fortunately, Michael Vick is the most mobile quarterback in history, so he does not need a great offensive line.</li>
</ul>
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<li>Defensive Line: Cullen Jenkins and Jason Babin should really help on the D-line. The Eagles run a 4-3 defense, so the defensive line are more important than the linebackers. The edge rush is there, but the inside run help is not. If the Eagles have one weakness this year, it's probably going to be that they can't stop the run. Their starting defensive tackles (Mike Patterson and Antonio Dixon) are average and their linebackers are pretty bad. Overall, I would give the defensive line a B. Great on the outside, not so great on the inside.</li>
</ul>
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<li>Linebackers: This is the only glaring weakness of the Philadelphia Eagles. The loss of Stewart Bradley really hurt this linebacking corps. I wouldn't be surprised to see the Eagles experiment with somebody like Juqua Parker at linebacker. Something obviously needs to be done, because the order of linebackers (in order of overall value to the defense) goes something like this; Erne Sims, Moise Fokou; Uh-oh.</li>
</ul>
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<li>Secondary: This might be one of the best secondaries in the history of football. The safeties are only average, but that does not matter when you have the depth at corner that the Eagles do. Nnamdi Asomugha eliminates the number 1 receiver of opposing teams. Most quarterbacks respect Asomugha so much that they simply don't throw to him. Since opposing quarterbacks don't want to throw the ball towards Asomugha, they have no choice but to throw it at Asante Samuel or Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie. Samuel and Rodgers-Cromartie are two of the best playmakers at the position in the whole league, and they will get plenty of opportunities to come up big this season.</li>
</ul>
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On the surface, they're the dream team. In my opinion, this year's Eagles are a more complete team than the 07 Patriots or the 85 Bears. Not necessarily better, but more complete. The 85 Bears didn't have a passing game, so you knew they were going to run it with Walter Payton when they could. The 07 Patriots had an underrated defense, but still only an average one. If you were a team that could pound the ball, take time off the clock, and convert third downs when they mattered (like the Giants) then the Pats were beatable as long as you didn't do anything stupid. The Eagles have few, if any, such weaknesses. Their weakness to the run is offset by their historic strength against the pass. Their only weakness that isn't compensated for is their inept coach, who thinks that it's great fun to run passing plays on 3rd and 1. The Eagles are complete. The Eagles have a great collection of talent on both sides of the ball. The Eagles have a secondary that can be considered the best ever. And the Eagles will not win the Super Bowl.<br />
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What? No Super Bowl? After all, that prediction seems contrary to everything I just told you. Let me explain. ESPN sportswriter Bill Simmons (one of the funniest writers on ESPN and registered shameless homer) received an idea from a fan about something called the Ewing Theory. This theory centered around the fact that when teams lose seemingly important players that have never won anything and everybody immediately writes them off for the next year, they inexplicably do well. This theory has manifested itself to some extent with the Eagles after losing Donovan McNabb last year. In my years of watching sports, I have also found the opposite to be true. I call it the Heat Theory (after the most obvious example of it). It's the opposite of the Ewing Theory. This theory is based on the fact that teams who are slated as heavy favorites or locks to win their respective league's championship long before the season ends often fall short. Examples in recent years include the 04 Yankees, the 07 Patriots, and the 2010 Miami Heat. An example of this theory happened in the NFC East last year, when the Dallas Cowboys season went up in flames after months of NFL experts predicting that this was their year. Inexplicable, right? Let's take a closer look. The Cowboys never had anybody on their team that won anything (unless you count Tony Romo's Choking Man award.). The Cowboys were largely a veteran team that was getting older (just to clarify, getting older for a veteran team is never good. It's great if you're a team like the Tampa Bay Bucs that has not yet reached your peak. Otherwise, it's pretty bad.) The Cowboys had changed nothing from the previous year when a quarterback who's ears still hurt from the Big Bang knocked them out of the playoffs. Taken as a whole, anybody who digged a little deeper than the impressive stats that were displayed in Sports Illustrated would find it hard to take the Cowboys seriously. And they would have been right. The scenario that played out with the Cowboys shares some common themes with the Eagles this year. The Eagles don't have people who have won significant things or have even been close to winning significant things. Only one important player on the whole roster (Asante Samuel) has ever been to a Super Bowl. This is especially important on a young team like the Eagles. This element isn't as vital on a veteran team that hasn't been there before but kind of instinctively knows how to deal with the pressure. The Eagles are not that team. This brings me to my second point; the pressure on this team is immense. It's Super Bowl or bust in the city where athletes are built up and busted down in a matter of days. Not only that, but some of the toughest teams in the league are gunning for the Eagles. The Giants (twice), the Jets, the Patriots, the Cowboys (twice), the Bears, and the Falcons will all get their shot at the Eagles. This Eagles team needs to experience "getting there" first before they experience the feeling of winning it all. For those who say that the Eagles already "got there" with the two wild card losses, no they didn't. Wild card is not close enough to where the Eagles are expected to go. The last time the Eagles came close was in 2008, and the 2011 Eagles are radically different from the 2008 Eagles. And then there's Andy Reid. Look at the four coaches who made it to the AFC/NFC Championship games last year. Rex Ryan, Mike Tomlin, Mike McCarthy, and Lovie Smith. They all gave you the impression that they knew what they were doing. Sure, McCarthy might have called some questionable timeouts (and that's an understatement), but he always gave you the impression that he was in control. Rex Ryan made some bad challenges during the season, but he also gave you the impression that he knew what he was doing. He also might have eaten a small piece of the Empire State Building. We'll never know for sure (Just to clarify; I am a huge Jets fan. I love Rex Ryan. But he's too much of an easy target to not joke about him. Let me state on the record that I will always like Rex Ryan for turning a terrible Jet defense in to the best in the league, establishing the team's identity as a smashmouth trash-talking team that is strong up front, and for giving the Jets an attitude that hasn't been seen since Bill Parcells. I will always respect him for that. After experiencing the Mangini era, we would have taken anybody that showed undeniable evidence of a pulse). So yeah. All of these coaches knew what they were doing and always looked like they had a plan. Now look at Andy Reid. His team had unfixed problems with short yardage situations for 2 years.<em> For two years</em>. During the 2008 and 2009 seasons, the Eagles repeatedly came up short on third downs, particularly within the red zone. For one of those seasons, he had Michael Vick. No team that has Michael Vick should have trouble in short yardage scenarios unless they're starting me at center. He's called more bad timeouts than McCarthy, more head scratching plays than Mangini, and more unspoken friction with McNabb than most people think. Flash forward to this year. Eagles-Packers. NFC Championship Game. The game is on the line. 4th and 3 from the Packers 4. 8 seconds left on the clock. Eagles need a touchdown to win. Do I trust Andy Reid to call the right play? Not in my lifetime. In a nutshell, the Eagles aren't winning the Super Bowl because the intangibles just aren't there. I know that this is a cliche phrase, but this team does not know how to win. But the great thing about football is that anything can happen. And although I don't see the Eagles winning it this year (although they are heavy favorites in my book for the 2012/2013/2014 Super Bowls if things progress as planned with this team), they certainly have the talent to surprise me. You expect the unexpected in the NFL. And as long as this still holds true, that's enough for me.</div>
Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5791315793574554003.post-75208545011843025972011-07-27T18:17:00.000-07:002011-09-09T13:48:14.284-07:00It's the Free Agent Pool. Jump In It<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
130-odd days. 19 weeks. Between 1000 and 2000 combined blank stares from Roger Goodell. But now it's over. A new CBA is officially in place for the next 10 years, ensuring labor peace for a long time to come. Football is back. Now that the lockout is over, months' worth of NFL's business as usual must be resolved in one month. The only thing lost in the work stoppage were the minicamps, OTA's , the Hall of Fame game, and months of free agency. The first three cant't be made up for. Free agency, however, can be made up for. We're about to see a process that takes a whole offseason, usually six months or so, be condensed in to three weeks. Free agent signings can be filed starting Friday night, but deals are in the works already. The Jets have recently resigned Santonio Holmes and are reportedly interested in Nnamdi Asomugha. The Titans have reached an agreement with Matt Hasselbeck, and the Vikings have reached a similar agreement with Donovan McNabb. But what about the people who don't have a deal yet? Where are they gonna go? That's why I'm here. Friday night is when the free agent pool starts to splash. I will be surrounded by multiple six packs of Gatorade, a TV with ESPN blaring, and a computer with fantasy football projections on it. Let the fun begin.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
KEVIN KOLB</div>
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Right now, it seems like Kevin Kolb would be heading to Arizona. The Eagles owe it to Kolb, who patiently waited behind McNabb, only to get injured and have Michael Vick take his starting job. Kolb deserves a chance to start, and Arizona has some weapons that Kolb can take advantage of. Larry Fitzgerald also deserves the chance to have someone with actual depth perception throwing to him. Every time Derek Anderson underthrew him or zipped one over his head at light speed, Fitzgerald would look like he was looking for an opportunity to break Anderson's arm so they could put Max Hall in the game. When your quarterback is so bad that you would be better off with an undrafted rookie in the game, that suggests a quarterback upgrade is in order. The only problem with Kolb is the Eagles' asking price. The Eagles want a high draft pick plus immediate secondary help, and I'm not sure that the Cardinals are ready to give that to them. The Eagles had counted on the Cardinals and the Seahawks to get in to a bidding war to drive the price up for Kolb, but Seattle has settled their QB situation with Tarvaris Jackson (Which is like saying that you satisfied your hunger by picking up a rock and eating it, but whatever.) Now that the Cardinals don't have a lot of competition for Kolb, they can try to wait the Eagles out for a lower price. My call is that Kolb eventually signs with the Cardinals for a 3rd round pick plus a corner.<br />
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DOZENS OF AVERAGE WIDE RECEIVERS PLUS PLAX</div>
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This might be the deepest free agent pool for wide receivers in the history of the NFL. The big prize (Santonio Holmes) is off the market, but there are plenty of other wide receivers to be had in this offseason. Sidney Rice, Braylon Edwards, Malcolm Floyd, Steve Smith, Terrell Owens, and Randy Moss are just some of the average wide receivers you can get for a decent price. This wide receiver free agent market is like the food on a cruise ship, unlimited quantities and average quality for a good price. Any team looking for a second or third wide receiver can easily find what they're looking for in this year's cruise food special. In addition to the cruise food wide receivers, Plaxico Burress has gotten out of prison and is mulling where to go next. I think that a team like the Rams or the Eagles makes a lot of sense. He can be a viable weapon for either team and take advantage of the third corners that will be covering him. There has been discussion of him going back to the New York Giants, but there isn't a place for him there anymore. I think that a Giants return would be akin to (wait for it...... wait for it......) shooting his career in the foot (I'm sorry, I couldn't resist.) As for the cruise buffet, it feels like half the league could pick up a new wide receiver. Teams that are loosing wide receivers such as the Jets and the Vikings are candidates to pick one up. Teams who don't have great receivers, such as the Chargers, could pick someone up. The Titans or Jaguars could help out their new rookie quarterbacks. The only teams that aren't in the running to help themselves to the cruise buffet are teams that are cutting players to get under the cap (like the Ravens) or teams that are set at wide receiver (like the Eagles or Packers).<br />
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NNAMDI ASOMUGHA AND OTHER CORNERBACKS</div>
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It's tough to say where Asomugha is going to land. The logical conclusion would be the team with the most cap space looking for secondary help would be the front-runners. If that were the case, then Tampa Bay and Houston would be leading the chase for Asomugha. However, this is not the case. The Jets are reported to be very interested in Asomugha, as are the Ravens and the Cowboys. The Jets are a mere one million dollars under the cap and don't have a lot of money to give Asomugha without restructuring a lot of deals and parting ways with Edwards and others. The Cowboys and Ravens just cut a lot of players to stay under the cap, so I can't even figure out a logical reason why any of these teams are included. The cap space is somewhat like extra time in soccer. The referee decides how much extra time to allow the game to continue with no rhyme or reason. I think the game is over, and then I see +4 minutes or +2 minutes pop up in the box. The cap is the same way. There are a billion different cap loopholes to exploit. These include, but are not limited to, backloading deals, incentive contracts, large signing bonuses, restructuring deals, etc. Before the past few days, I followed a very logical line of reasoning as to why the Jets could not get Asomugha.<em> Asomugha wants 10 million per year. We have 1 million per year left on our cap. Unless we frame Edwards and Cromartie for a crime, we can't get Asomugha.</em> I never even knew all of these loopholes existed. It's kind of like paying taxes, only with superstar cornerbacks at stake. In the end, I say that Asomugha lands in either Tampa Bay or Houston, with the Jets moving on to a different corner. As for the second-tier cornerback section of the cruise buffet, there are a lot of options. Jonathan Joseph is the next best prize in free agency, and there are no shortage of second tier corners out there to round out the list. Corners such as Chris Carr and Drayton Florence can be had for reasonable prices. I could see every team that expressed interest in Asomugha (that missed out on him) grabbing a corner. If the cap is a problem for the Jets/Ravens/Cowboys, there are plenty of other corners to be had. Only teams that are either set in the secondary (like the Packers) or teams that have a billion more pressing needs (like the Cardinals) are out of the market for a corner.<br />
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BRETT FAVRE AND CEDRIC BENSON</div>
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(Quick note before the final breakdown. I would have reviewed every free agent in detail if they were each unique, but they're really not. After Asomugha, the cornerback market is essentially the same. Ditto for the wide receiver market after Holmes. The rest of the free agent class ranges from good yet unremarkable to Tim Thomas level awful. Also it's too time consuming to review every free agent when 95% of them are forgettable).<br />
It's that time again. Turn the mics on, prepare a different team's baseball cap, fire up the chartered plane to Hattiesburg, and make sure to focus the camera in on the gray hairs in the beard. That's right, it's BRETT FAVRE time. I personally hate the guy for stabbing every single Packers fan alive in the back, but he always makes things interesting. Rumors are swirling about Favre returning to back up Michael Vick on the Philadelphia Eagles. I can tell you right now that's not going to happen. His ego is too huge and his likely price tag too ridiculous to allow a relegation to a backup role. His "silent ego" is in the model of a Gary Payton, somebody who didn't know when enough was enough and continued to act like a star well in to his 30s. I think that Favre signs on to start with whatever team ends the bad QB scramble without a quarterback and ends up panicking days before the season. I can see this happening with somebody like the Bills (no true QB) or the Jaguars (still looking for Blaine Gabbert insurance). <br />
Now that DeAngelo Williams is off the board, Cedric Benson is the marquee running back in a free agent class that has no depth at RB. Benson could end up going to any number of teams. Off the bat, I think of the Seahawks (could use a true running back) and the Ravens (Need replacement for Willis McGahee) as potential candidates. That wraps up the review of the cruise food free agent pool. Thanks for reading</div>
Commish Slicehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241753522248911962noreply@blogger.com0